Misogynists

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wow man that is one amazing analysis.. i concur wholeheartedly... you da man!

i think that the men & women are essentially speaking different languages... like the other guy said, males have one thing on their mind (sex, without which they'll become depressed and snap) and the females have something else on their mind (socialization, without which they'll also become depressed and snap)...

you said: "It's the complete imbalance. It seems like most of the blokes are so distracted by thoughts of sex, that nothing else functions in their brain, when they know the person they're in conversation with is female."

but this could have just as well come from a guy with a few words changed: "It's the complete imbalance. It seems like most of the women are so distracted by thoughts of talking, that nothing else functions in their brain, when they know the person they're in conversation with is male."

thing is, neither one is wrong... it's not right that men are constantly being given the stick, when this is what men are programmed to do... why is talking inherently better than f*****g anyways? it's certainly unnatural, seeing as how with the exception of humans, the entire plant and animal kingdom dispense with the talking and just get on with it.

While you are cheerfully blinded by T&A into chasing some high-maintenance, frivolous little airhead who isn't going to give you the time of day... the worthwhile women wait. You know that female "geek" who shares your interests? She waits. That gamer girl who whipped your ass on a console game the other night? She waits. That woman who sits a few desks away from you in Physics class, who cares nothing for social gamesmanship? She waits.

Yes, she could go to a bar somewhere, pick up some random idiot, and go home with him. And yet, she won't... as a quality female, she has standards and would not even consider cruising bars for drunkards.

And so, she waits.

There are many other women, who are far less flashy, far more genuine, and far more compatible with you. They wait, and they grow tired of waiting... eventually growing angry at your apparent inability to think with your brain rather than your dick. How much longer do you plan on keeping them waiting, while you think of bimbos and play with yourself? Wake up.

Long ago I was in that position myself, and my sympathies still lie with the lonely female geek I once was. It's a real shame that male geeks have to get burned so many times by bimbos before they finally learn.

Hazelwudi:

i'm in a bit of a special situation, so a lot of the things you say don't really apply to me... but i'm sure that all of it applies to the other aspie males out there...

specificially, i live in UAE, where 33% are women and 66% men... i kid u not, look it up in the guinness world records website... so basically most women are married or have boyfriends etc... this environment is bad enough for NT males; imagine what it's like for aspie males... the women just naturally gravitate to the men with the most money.

anyways, in my case atleast I have to ask.. WHY WAIT? for me, social situations are a minefield, and I would much rather the woman just take control instead of standing somewhere and waiting.. in fact, to avoid unintentionally looking the wrong way at people, i just keep my eyes on the floor most of the time and thus don't really notice people... many's a time when my closest friends or family just walk right next to me and i don't notice them

never in my entire life have i been approached by a woman and seriously hit on... and i'm 30 years old. i can vaguely remember two women who came up to me & talked to me for a bit (few sentences) and then just seemed to give up. it reminds me of that scene in spiderman 2 where spidey and his GF are in this restaurant and she's just desperate to be with him, even though he's refusing her repeatedly.... do such women exist? on this planet? in this universe?

mind you, i'm intelligent, caring, sensitive, multitalented, have a sense of humor, can and love to dance etc...

I don't want to be here anymore...! i want to go back to my home planet!

Oh gosh, I feel really embarrassed about this...

Hazelwudi, I was making the point about menstruation metaphorically. I feel very guilty now as you've put a lot of effort and information into your reply. Having said that, I HAVE learned some new things so your effort has not been wasted! Thank you for such an in-depth response.

The thing I find confusing is why women feel that certain topics should not be discussed with men. All men - end of story. I find that very strange, and in the long run I'm convinced that it causes problems in relationships.

This is not to say that men are any better at being candid. They're generally worse, for they CLAIM to discuss things but normally just make jokes or lie. Men are incredibly bad at conversations where they are potentially vulnerable:- the male ego is a very sensitive thing. Women are actually far better at discussing taboo subjects, when they allow themselves to.

My point, though, is that men and women who ARE prepared to open up and participate in 'sensitive' conversations should be allowed to do so. That way, everybody benefits from understanding each other's feelings and views. (That's also why I object to the wolf whistle comments, MrMark - they belittle the views of the women who post in the Men's Forum and prevent a proper dialogue from taking place. If you didn't butt in, you might learn something).

I think I've been quite lucky in many ways. I have a fairly 'female' brain (if the survey elsewhere on this site is to be believed) and my best friends have always been women. As an Aspie I've always been attracted to people who are 'alternative' in some way (which means they're generally very honest and open minded). As a consequence over the years I've been involved in perfectly matter-of-fact conversations about issues such as miscarriages, endometriosis, difficulties in breast-feeding, sex during periods, female ejaculation, the morning-after pill, chocolate bars as sex aids... you name it, we've probably talked about it. So it seems really weird to find that on WP (which is supposed to be an open-minded and fairly unconventional forum), men aren't allowed to get involved in any of these discussions.

Ok, so sometimes these things can get embarrassing, even for someone with Asperger's who hasn't got a clue what's "good manners" and what isn't . But they're equally embarrassing for both men AND women, and once you're beyond that everything is fine. Take STDs, for example. Women might find talking about a disease such as Syphilis to be embarrassing. Well yeah, ok, but do you think we don't? It's the same for everyone.

So what is the point of segrated forums? Someone asked on the Men's forum what should go there and what should go in the Mature forum and I said if you want to hear from women, post in mature, and if you don't, post in Men's. I'd really like to hear from the women who asked for a women's forum in the first place. Why did they feel they needed a Women's forum?

When you keep your eyes on the floor and just shut down in social situations, the social message you're sending is, "I'm uncomfortable and don't want to connect with you, so leave me alone." This is why the women respond as they do... via body language, you've told them you're not interested and to go away.

i definitely think that "womens only forum" is sexist... what next? a "white people only" forum? "dogs and indians not allowed"? etc etc..

what's going on in this "womens only forum" anyways? lesbian orgies no doubt...! *imagination lifts off into orbit*

yeah.. well there's no easy answer to this problem... i have this difficulty with eye contact a lot of the time, i'm only completely at ease among my closest friends... and i avoid looking at strangers directly because people have told me that i "stare" a lot (as opposed to "glances" "looks" etc).. and the best part is, i'm squint-eyed, but just a little bit.. and it's noticeable if i look directly at someone....

BTW hellznrg, love your signature, wish more people understood.

thanks MrMark Meister 2000 professional

yeah.. it's from a computer game Deus Ex 2... the game was sorta crap (didn't live up to its predecessor) but anyways in the closing scenes, this god-computer says the immortal words and i'm like... just frozzen in my chair dribbling and drolling like an idiot...! well ok not really!

The only thing I can think of is that it's a place solely for TOPICS of particular relevance to women. And therefore, if you're a man, you know you need to be particularly well-behaved and lay off the fart jokes. It's like being invited into somebody else's house - you are welcome inside but you respect their way of doing things; you don't trample mud into the living room carpet, take charge of the TV remote control or criticise the decor.

That's the sort of atmosphere I'd like to see here - one where men are allowed in, but must act with respect.

I have felt that way as well. I have also felt the opposite is true in the Men's room, hence my sometimes crude responses. It clearly says mature content does not belong there, tongue in cheek I think.

You're welcome.

Don't feel bad about it. Throughout my life, most of my friends have been male, and I'm quite used to having to field such questions. I think I could explain it in my sleep, lol.



I think some women are used to being ridiculed by men over certain topics? That seems the most likely explanation. I am not uneasy over it myself. *shrugs* You ridicule me, I'll ridicule you in turn, and you'll learn not to do it because being ridiculed in turn sucks! That's how I see it, at least.

I've been reading old threads, and I noticed the fracas which ensued over female orgasms in the men's forum. Biologically speaking, it generally takes women longer to reach orgasm than men. If you guys think it's a hassle, picture our frustration of it taking so damn long to get off! Have you ever fallen asleep while masturbating? Probably not. But some women do... I've heard tell of such things. Sad, ain't it?



Heh! In my experience, nearly everyone lies... either to make themselves appear stronger than they actually are, or to make themselves appear to be a "better person" than they actually are. Men usually do the former, women usually do the latter.

My sense of humor is much more typically "male" though, as are my interests and overall thought processes. I think that's why I get along with men better. Woohoo, gaming and toilet humor! *cheers*



To me, it's a win/win situation. If it is an honest dialogue, that's fine. If it degenerates into a verbal brawl, sometimes I quite like verbal brawlings... so that's fine too. Muahahah.



Heh, I'm the same way, only in reverse. Female, with a mostly male brain. I find cute things endearing... puppies and so on... sexually speaking I'm only ever attracted to males, and being long habituated to my own breasts, I really don't view breasts as a big deal. Those are pretty much the only three archetypically "female" psychological traits I've got.

Having had so many female friends, can you rationally explain the thing for chocolate to me? I don't have it myself, and I've yet to get a halfway decent explanation for it.



True.

There is a solution, but I'm not certain it is implementable in your case.

Look at it like this... most people are ignorant, uninformed, and fairly uninteresting. At best, they function as background scenery in other people's lives. Is this not what they are, at base... animated background scenery? This doesn't mean that it's perfectly ok to take a chainsaw to one, or something... background scenery or not, they're still living things. I'd no more take a chainsaw to one than I would go randomly cutting down trees, and for precisely the same reason.

Does it really matter what such people "think" of you? No. And logically, if you cease to worry about what they "think" of you, your social anxiety should decrease accordingly?