do you ever feel asexual?

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Thanks for clearing that up. Unless it turns out I am just extraordinarily picky, or some sort of sexual desire comes after I enter a real relationship with a man, then it definitely sounds heteroasexual would be the right description for me. "Homoasexual" and just plain "asexual" don't seem right.

I think, though, that I'm going to have to get a better idea of what's normal for a heterosexual woman, until I can come to a real conclusion, but I am starting to feel more certain of what it is. I think the fact that I had a clear preference kept me from really understanding that there was anything I could be than the normal heterosexual.

But the thing is, I'm almost 27, so should I have experienced sexual arousal in the presence of a man by now? (Or woman, theoretically, but like I said, I am very sure of a preference on the romantic level for men.)

No problem! I think just taking your time with it is the best option. I didn't even know about asexuality until I was 24. Before that, I wasn't sure if there was a medical problem with me or if maybe I hadn't found the right guy, even though I remember always feeling "asexual," despite not knowing what it was. Even as a kid, I had asexual feelings. Once I learned about asexuality, I then made sure that I didn't have any hormone problems (note: I have a high sex drive, actually, I just happen not to be attracted to either gender). After I tested all the paths, I decided that I am absolutely asexual and have carried that label ever since. So yeah, definitely check out all of your options if you can!



Thing is, sexuality is so different for everyone that no one can say you should have by now or not. Personally, I'd think that you should have experienced some sexual attraction by now if you were going to, but I might be incorrect. Who knows. You just might be one of the people who only feel it once you fall in love (which would be a bit more like demisexuality), or just possibly, you might be asexual.

www.asexuality.org might be a good starting point for you. Feel free to pm me if you want, too. I've already walked the road you are on now and maybe I can help somehow.

I've had crushes...strong ones, in fact, and always on men. And I could definitely imagine spending my life with one man. But, there is never any sexual arousal along with it. (Then again, I never actually had the chance to date a man I had a crush on.) I've had sexual feelings, but they're detached.

Yeah, you sound really asexual to me. That's exactly what I feel... minus the crushes. I'm a-romantic. But lots of asexuals feel romantic love without the sexual attraction and lots of asexuals feel detached sexual feelings.

Thanks for putting up with me.

I think it's kind of interesting, though, that I've known since high school that I have a religious calling (though I'm not sure what, yet). I've heard people talk about how they don't think a celibate's life is "natural," but I have no problem imagining myself living that form of religious lifestyle. My church does not require celibacy and has married clergy, but I do think it's a rather interesting conjunction of circumstances.

I'm so glad to help!

Dude, if you feel like celibacy is what you should do, then do it. Plus, there is not a person in this world who has a "natural" life. Everyone is unique in some way.

nope

I do not know what that means. but im 100% straight.

A GREAT deal of the time, if not most of the time.

As a teen I had sexual desires but I thought that I would be asexual because I was confused about my orientation, I wanted to be with boys and girls and it was overwhelming so I said eff it.

I am still the same way but my sex drive is out of control, I guess I was never truly asexual to begin with but sometimes I feel like it'd be easier. I'm not very interested in relationships, but I really need sex. I have done the friends with benefits thing,, which is nice.

I'm asexual

I felt that way for a really long time, but recently have undergone a kind of awakening (in myself, but haven't done anything about it) because of some really intense attention (not aggressive, just very openly coming on to me which hadn't happened in a while) from a friend. Who is still a friend and, at the time, was unaware of my issues with AS and some PTSD also. He's pretty understanding now, although the occasional comment does happen.

Not sure how or if I would want to pursue this, though...

I think I am mostly asexual. I've only liked like 5 people in my whole life enough to really care about sex. The girl I like now (totally hopeless situation) makes me wanna have sex. She's pretty much the only person I've ever felt that way with, I think because I have an emotional connection w/her.

You cannot be "mostly" asexual, just like one can't be mostly gay or mostly straight (unless they are bi... haha!). Asexuality is an orientation, not a lifestyle. You sound demisexual, not asexual.

A person who identifies as a Demisexual is, according to Rabger's model, a person who does not experience primary sexual attraction but yet still experiences secondary sexual attraction. Primary sexual attraction being sexual attraction based on outward qualities such as a person's looks, clothes, or personality. Secondary sexual attraction being attraction to another stemming from emotional connection (usually romantic) or status or how closely the person is in relationship to the other. http://www.asexuality.org/wiki/index.ph ... Demisexual

If you want to have sex with someone and are attracted to them, you are not asexual.

I'm in no way asexual - quite the opposite. Whenever I have a boyfriend I cannot get enough.
Sex to me is a great pleasure and a huge ego boost (being desired and all that). Also it's a way of getting extremely close to my hubby. I want to experiment, want it in many different ways and the same way hundreds of times.
It's odd for I never desire other men whenever I'm in a relationship, but I want my love all the time. I believe my emotions are too overwhelming, which leaves no space for other men to occupy. ^__^
Bah - I want my hubby now. <3

I AM asexual