moms with AS

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When my kids were younger, I had to bite the bullet on the time alone thing. Now that they are teens it is a lot easier. They like time to themselves too. All I can say is...it gets better.

How many of you have Aspie or PDD partners? Our unborn son (our first child) is getting a double dose, so he'll probably be one of us too!

Have been following an interesting thread on shutdowns (how to recover etc.). One problem I have with shutdowns is the time I feel I'm losing: "I have things to do!" But in the past I could just tell myself that I could catch up later when I was feeling functional again. But now that I have a kid (16 months old) "later" is when the nanny is done for the day, and by the time the baby's asleep I'm too exhausted to get anything done. How have others dealt with this?

I am an undiagnosed AS 42 yr. old homeschooling mom. I have an 11 yr. AS son, 8 yr. & 22 mo. NT daughters. I basically have two spurts of catching up. We sleep late (8 am) and I clean house for an hour while the baby has a sippy cup. Then I cook breakfast. My other spurt is about an hour before my husband comes home from work. Many chores get undone (by the baby) but I just do as much as possible. I have learned to let the unimportant things go. Each child has taught me to not sweat the small stuff. I have never been scheduled and just do the best I can. I have never heard of anyone else letting the baby nap and not getting dressed so as not to disturb. I have done the same exact thing many times and was agitated at allowing the baby to control me and my plans. I hate shopping and also have to psyche myself up for it. I enjoy making list and planning but not going. I do not get much quiet time. I find myself zoning out on the computer or with TV just to cope because I never have a babysitter. My favorite times are when my husband takes my son fishing and us girls rent a movie(even better if the baby takes a nap!) I never wanted kids either. My first just happened and then the second was natural because I also wanted a daughter. The baby girl was a healing to our marriage after a near divorce. I believe my husband did not understand my lack of affection with AS (I cannot multi-task and was too focused on the kids) and I did not understand his ADHD overemotional snap reactions. God healed our marriage and here we are. He is a workaholic and does more than his share around here. I feel bad that he takes up alot of my slack but I deal with the children 24/7. I don't feel like a great mom but everybody else says I am. I thank God for all of my blessings. I am so thankful for this forum. I am not alone!

Wholesome, you pretty much summed up my entire life(at least as far as motherhood is concerned) in just a few sentences. You're not alone, by a long shot. This is just a guess, but do you have post its, and various lists of schedules, and things to do strewn about? I sure do. Love the list making, just not as keen on following through.

I don't have children...
I am engaged, and plan to get married next year. My fiance and I want to have a family. My mom won't even discuss the possibility of me having kids, it's not something we talk about... it is like she thinks I'm incapable.

I have a 16 yrs old daughter who has ADD and maybe some sensory integration issues. I also have a 3.5 yrs old daughter that is suspect for AS/PDD-NOS. I am self diagnosed as of recently. I also have found myself re-evaluating my life from the perspective of AS and finding that it explains everything.

I have always felt like everything that I do is "clinical". I have raised my children "by the book". Whenever there is an issue to deal with, I always consult the book rather than using my intuition. Everyone seems okay. However, my teenager hates to ask me questions because she says that my answers are too long and have too much detail. She also says that I am not sympathetic, but this could just be because she is a teen.


I started college when my oldest was born. I attended 11 years of college! My oldest was always in daycare and spent a lot of time with my mom because I was a single parent. I always felt "up for the callenge" when I had time to spend with her because I could mentally prepare myself for the sensory "assult" of picking her up from school or whatever. Now, I am a stay-at-home-mom with my 3.5 yrs old daughter. I just applied to graduate school because I need a break!! Don't get me wrong, I love my girls. I just don't have the nerves to be on call 24/7. Fortunately, my little one is suspect for AS and she spends a lot of time alone (by choice). She prefers to play in her room rather than interact. I have learned the signals that she may be interupting my train of thought soon and have learned to "prep" for the assult. However, from time to time, it is almost more than I can take! I need to be alone!! ! It is the only way for me to recharge.

Yes, well, I'm pregnant and soon to be a mom with AS ( baby due in May 8th 2008 ) Star Trek release date.
Hopefully she holds out until after the movie.

I love Star Trek. So do my kid's. The new movie should be good.

My baby is 31/2 and has an earinfection that started yesterday She has not been her usual fun self as all I'll say.

I'm grateful to have a husband that adores her and will take her to the store and enjoy an outing with just the two of them. And grandparents that originally almost faught over taking care of her so in that way I have been blessed. We had her when I was almost 40. I was always trying to make up my mind whether I wanted children or not and time moved on obviously.

Am currently struggling with 2 things in my life. One is I have sever Panic/Social Phobia so to get me to go anywhere and not rush to get out of the building is a major stressor. My husband hates it and I worry that my daughter is missing out on too much normal kid stuff. The second is I would like to have another as we both had siblings and I don't necessarily want my baby to be a one and only.
It's a tough decision as my husband's company has done many cutbacks which is happening all over. And I would be years older then last time if we could even get pregnant. I didn't have alot of energy (never did), but I didn't have any children with the first pregnancy. I would have an active little girl though if we tried for number 2. Also we are concerned about the type of education we want her to have so I would be pregnant and homeschooling in my 40s? So would I be crazy to attempt this????

Well thanks for letting me ramble tonite

i am a mum with AS.
it's been the hardest thing to do. and i do it.

I'm an AS mum with an NT daughter and an autistic son. Both my children are in their early 20s now. I'm divorced but get on well with my ex. My daughter is married with two children and my son goes to a special college. It's been hard work and I have only known about AS for the last ten years and this was after my divorce.

I feel that the hardest part of family life apart from childcare has been the socialising you have to do along the way with inlaws, partner's friends, people at parent groups and people in my family telling me what I should be doing and pulling my strings like I'm some kind of puppet.