Advice for a 10 year old who has just started menstruating?

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I'm an advisory teacher supporting staff in schools to meet the needs of youngsters with ASD. A girl on my caseload has recently started menstruating. Her mother (nurse) has already had a discussion with her and so she is quite aware of a lot of factual information and how her emotional state may be affected. Does anyone have any advice I could pass on to her which would help?

Many thx

hello DebbyDo,
I started menstruating at 11 (on my 11th birthday!) so I understand completely. It is very young to learn how to care for myself, how heavy the flow and how it came around relentlessly 13 times a year. Had I to do it all over again, I would have done better if it had one of my rituals and would have planned for it (rather than being constantly 'surprised' every month).

So, if she is AS she might do well to make it a ritual and embrace it rather than it being and denying it.

Merle

P.S. and as synchronicity would have it, my last period was on my 55th birthday!

I started mine on my 12th birthday. I knew what it was when it came because I'd been told in school about it. I was so not bothered by it that I didn't even tell my mum until three months later when I looked in her drawer and she had no sanitary pads for me to use. And I used to go to swimming club twice a week, so I had to stop that because I knew I wasn't ready for tampons, and she would wonder why. And I didn't want ppl to know I was on, on the week I'd not go swimming (lol)!

I don't really know what else you could tell her.. if she's been told the facts, then she should, having ASD, think of it logically (going on my own personal experience). Just let her know if she has any questions or needs some help with it, you're there for her. But bear in mind she might not actually want you to know, let alone talk about it.

It sounds like she knows a lot of facts; just make sure you're available for questions. I was terrified and angry when I first started menstruating, but now I have a routine to go with it. I would suggest having her make it into a routine.

I started when I was 11. I didn't really take much notice (I had the flu at the time...) and didn't have a clue what was going on. When I was better and I had my second one, Mum showed me how to put the pad in and gave me a book about the subject. It was aimed at younger girls (don't know the name) and had a lot of pictures and was easy to read which is a big deal for me! Just be ready to answer ANY questions about it. Don't force her into speaking about it either because a lot of young girls are not comfortable talking about it for a long time. It took me 10 years to get brave enohg to talk to people about it!

I started when I was about 12. Around that time, my hygiene and self-care skills were the pits..I was so oblivious about my body...even though I read girly books and theoretically knew what to do and whatnot....My first few periods were so heavy that I was quarantined at my grandmother's house for the duration every month...and I just bled and bled...It took me a long time to learn not to be careless with hygiene...so some sort of tactful instruction in that regard might be helpful...though I am sure that not all AS girls had the self-care issues I had when I was young.

One book that helped me so much that I don't know how I would have gotten through those years of menustration and puberty without it is "The care and keeping of you:the body book for girls" that is made by American Girl Company. You can find this book at bookstores or even stores like target in the book section. This book was an absolute life saver and showed me basic things like how to insert a tampon, put on a pad, how to shave, why brushing your teeth and showering everyday is important, etc. I passed this book down to my younger sister and she seems to like it as well. You can order it directly from amazon or the American Girl website.

I started very early, and started confining myself to the house while bleeding.
A) In case of leeks
B) Because I hated it so much I wanted nothing associated with it and I wanted to stop life till it ended.

I am afraid this is just something I grew out of eventually. I ignore though dislike now. Only thing I can say is that it is great ye ARE looking out for her. Keep her active and going out and involved in life!

I started when I was 12 and started experiencing cramps early on. By the time I was 14 or 16 I got really painful periods, so it takes a few years to know if you're among the 10% that get the horrible pain.

I use a menstrual calendar to know just when my next period will be. After two or so weeks if I don't have pads in the house I buy them. I carry at least one pad with me at all times. When I do have my period I always take painkillers with me, wherever I go.
Before a cycle I lay off the salt, junk food and alcohol. At least a week before.
My weight goes up 5 or 6kg so I don't freak out about it because it will come off when my period goes.
Always drink water during menstruation.

Dealing with pain without painkillers:
Heating pad, elevate legs, exercise, drink water, stay in a cool place, eat fruit, loose clothing, etc.
I have to use heavy painkillers now so I don't do the above as often.

This is a great site for tracking monthly cycles so you know which days to prepare for: http://monthlyinfo.com

Sounds better than the book I was given ... my mom didn't bother to explain anything, just handed me a book about babies and giving birth (...!), skipping the vital bits in between. It had a cartoon bug explaining it all. No one mentioned bleeding, pain, mood swings, annoyingly happening once a month whether I liked it or not so I better get used to it until you are 50+ when all of a sudden it stops and then you will just WISH problems happened only once a month...augh. I don't think mom ever did explain what was happening, was mostly annoyed that I didn't already know ...? Maybe if I had friends I wouldn't have had to work it out for myself, but if your only friend is a barbie, who doesn't do those sorts of things, your knowledge base becomes somewhat limited. I didn't menstruate until age 12 I think, and it was a surprise, PMS was a surprise, etc .

I seem to get very nauseated with periods. That is a good thing to warn about too. I found for me mint chocolate usually does the trick (for whatever reason). Be hydrated, warm baths are a godsend some days, , etc - standard advice I guess.

Just being prepared by having a pad in a small purse in her backpack if she doesn't already carry a purse is a good idea. Most young women aren't regular for the few few years or so. Making sure she knows about deodorant and that she must use it everyday it's like bully repelent. That she knows how to care for her skin again part of the bully proofing. That and the fact that if some boy/man pushs her in to sex she can get pregent and that it's her body and her right to tell them NO. I've read over and over in this forum stories of girls with AS getting pushed or forced in to sex with older men. We have to becareful with these young women and try our damnest not to let it happen anymore.

I had to laugh at this because Im in my forties and I *still* am surprised every month! duh.

Oh wow. I didn't have any idea what was going on with me! Mine started at the age of 11 or !2 My mom didn't tell me anything! I hid it and felt like I wanted to die....literally! The mood swings and depression started around 12.

I despised anything that had to do with me growing up or becoming a woman. I hid everything, my mom raised 4 boys before me and I was 9 years younger than my closest aged brother, so needless to say (and growing up in an emotionally void household) this time of my life....and through high school also, was hell for me!

I got mine on the 4th of July in 1997. I was surprised but didn't freak out. I wasn't expecting it but knew I would maybe start when I'm 12 or later. My mom got hers on her 12th birthday. Then two days later, my period was gone and didn't come till the end of August or so and it was right before the first day school started. I was embarrassed having it and didn't want my brothers to know or kids in my school but couldn't hide it. I had a bloody accident in school so kids knew in my class and the fact my brothers saw my used pads in the bathroom and knew they were from me because Mom doesn't change her pads in there, she does in her own bathroom. Then it effected my hormone and I be very emotional and my parents had to walk on eggshells because anything they could say would put me to tears. Then I got put on birth control when I was 13.

Many thanks to all of you who took the time to post a response - I will pass your comments on to her Mum.