Girls and obsessions/ social ineptness

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I keep hearing that Aspie girls/women are better at hiding social ineptness than Aspie boys/men and that they often mirror others to learn how to respond, and that females don’t get obsessive on subjects while males do.

This describes me very poorly and I wonder how many of the females here feel that they fit this picture. Do you have obsessions? Do/did you mimick others?

I am prone to both obsessions and ineptness...
Granted..i am not completely inept..I can often turn lots of people off, but sometimes I can surprisingly maintain..only to a degree...and I have some friendships with people who don't make me uncomfortable.
I have been prone all my life to obsessions...There have been times when I have been isolated under the weight of my obsessions...but also times when my obsessions have allowed me to have a sort of social life...like the period of a few years where my obsession was planning elaborate theme concerts....I would set a date at a venue, months in advance, with a theme in mind, and focus all of my energy on getting ready for that date...It involved talking to lots of people in bands...which was embarrassing 'cause I couldn't recognize faces...and had to re-remember who they were over and over again...

It was loverly..i remember one of the people in one of the bands said.."You're a bit neurotic, aren't you?"

From what they found out is girls with ASDs can carry multiple obsessions, or cycle through obsessions quickly, are often pretty typical for women, instead of carrying a single all encompassing oddball obsession.

I will say, while I can be socially inept, I am can be social. I am not sure if its reflecting, I am certianly an odd girl, but I am actually fairly social. It however does take me longer to get to know people and I have had public meltdowns which endangered friendships.

I'm all of the above. I have many obsessions that I cycle through, occasionally adding a few more to the mix when I'm inspired. I also have an underlying obsession with tv/movies and actors - my friends call me a walking imdb

Well, they did... when I had friends. Because I'm also quite socially inept. I can usually deal with one person at a time but the trouble begins once a group starts to form. Unless I know everyone in the group - there was one glorious summer when all the people I had known for years all became friends and we all hung out and it was great. Right now I'm having trouble with keeping in contact with the few friends I have. I go from extremes, calling all the time to not calling ever to see if they'll call me instead. Right now I'm always free and they're not so I never know when I should ask if they want to hang out, especially when I've asked a few times and they already have plans. I have told one in particular to let me know when he's free but he never does so I think maybe he doesn't want to hang out anymore

Anyway, that's more than I meant to write, I got side tracked with my sad social problems. Off to imdb to cheer myself up

I am both socially inept and somewhat obsessive. I become easily obsessed with people which often leads me to trouble. I am constantly unsure what to do in a social sitation. I know what to do in theory but executing it is difficult. I think my anxiety problems interfere with making me seem more socially inept.

That goes for me as well, except I don't cycle through them quickly. They can last for some years for me and they are always on my mind while they last, while special interests are eternally on my mind but not obsessively so. Sometimes I have several obsessions going on at once. Some only last a few feverish days.


Thanks for your responses!

I obsess over things for short periods of time, maybe a week or two. I need variety I guess! My social ineptness varies upon the situation and how comfortable I am with it. Out shopping I can usually blend in and be fine, quick conversation is fine. But if I'm in a situation where I need to have longer conversations with people that I don't know I usually just become mute. I have a very hard time with people that I don't know unless somehow we click immediately but that doesn't happen often.

Rings very true for me.

I get some obsessions which last only a few months and some which can last years. with varying intensity. So yeah, it's not just one big one for me.
I am quite inept, but can be really good at hiding it. It is mostly mirroring others. Works quite well.

I'm able to hide my ineptness by keeping most people as acquaintances. I kind of overdo my reactions when I have friends who share 'big news' with me. I only have 1 friend I regularly spend time with and we both have similar obsessions(I suspect she has AS, too).

Me too.

I'm socially inept.

I have no friends anymore, and the ones I do have I talk to on MSN a few times a week. I just can't connect with others at all.

I used to obsess over things as a child, like dinosaurs and cats. I'd learned everything I could about them. I also really liked memorizing end of the world scenarios and disturbing my classmates. Not many ten year olds know what a singularity is and how to describe it to other ten year olds. I was also very interested in ancient and foreign cultures. I remembered I tried translating the Rosetta Stone one class period, I think.

I also had this obsession with digging holes.

I'm socially inept, but I've learned to hide it as I've gotten older (I'm 41).

Also, I do have obsessions - some long-term ones, some shorter cycling ones. I get the impression a 'typical' male Aspie obsession will be something technical, though, whereas mine have been stuff to do with languages, history and philosophical stuff, and I've also had obessions with particular people. I've learned not to talk about these subjects unless it's appropriate.