Do people think you have AS?

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I know most of you are not ashamed of being Aspies and don't feel the need to 'pass" as NT, but do most people think that you could be autistic?

I am wondering how women decide to deal with these issue, as you are often less VISIBLY impacted by the disorder.

I have no diagnosis but people that I know closely may suspect AS, if they enough about the disorder. Most other people think that I am different or weird but "in a good way" (so they say lol, but I have had friends who I can tell genuinely appreciated my strangeness), it's probably possible for most people to tell that I have a little ADHD. I can be kind of spazzy sometimes.

As far as my autistic traits, which I definitely have, most people wouldn't pick up on that. I never do anything like stim in public, I've stopped correcting people for the most part and I try not to monologue, not because I think I need to appear less autistic but because it IS annoying and in the past before I even knew anything about AS I really hated that I did that.

I have the good autistic traits as well, great logic skills, an amazing memory, I learn fairly quickly and most people think that I'm very smart. It's just that most people don't associate THESE traits with autism, they just think I'm smart and capable. It's catch 22 because what is making me so awesome in some areas has pretty big drawbacks for me in others.

So I'm not trying desperately to hide my true self or anything, but I guess in some ways I feel like I need to. If I just let go and became my 100% natural, true self all the time, people wouldn't like me very much. They probably wouldn't even suspect AS, they would just think I was antisocial and a bit crazy. I'm not antisocial in the true sense of the word. I do like people, a lot, actually, but socializing with them is just not my first intention. I have to make myself do that, it will probably never come naturally. Once I do, I can really enjoy it but I don't think I would be very affected if all of my friends disappeared. I just don't know what I really offer people, you know? I would do almost anything for a very close friend and i have been a good friend in the past but I STIILL don't *get* it, not completely. Everyday socializing, small talk, updating people about my life, it just seems like a foreign concept to me.

I also don't have many of the cognitive impairments that people who know nothing of the disorder would aspect an Aspie to have. I do have some, just not really obvious ones, no trouble with voice modulation, I seem to be fluid enough in my movements and I'm pretty articulate most of the time. This would probably lead people to believe that I'm mentally ill, rather than just having a brain that's wired differently. AS is considered a handicap by many and I definitely appear very able most of the time.

So I guess I choose to try and be a little bit more *normal* than I actually am, but what about you guys? Is your AS something that is just apparent to most people, or do you get away with being considered quirky or fun?

I mean no offense to those that really struggle with ther AS and cannot just choose to appear normal when they want to . I am just genuinely curious about women with the disorder and how they choose to present themselves, since I know functioning in social situations is often easier for them.

I have no idea how I come across to people, though I'm sure I come across as odd. I'm definitely not one of those women with great social skills, I don't really know how to fake normal because I don't know how or I see some of the behaviours as very strange. I mimic a lot, but I don't always mimic the right things or use them in the right context. I think the best strategy for me has been to try to be as invisible and quiet as possible and if people don't notice me, they won't bother me or expect me to be social with them. I have a good memory and logic, but I have a hard time speaking and thinking on the spot so I've always been thought of as rather stupid by my peers in school even though I'd got better grades than them. I also stim, I try to stick to ones that aren't too noticeable but it's not really a conscious thing with me, and I can't really stop unless I divert all my attention to it. As far as how I present myself, I don't know, I try to be polite and quiet and try to keep up with everyone the best I can - though now I'm really curious as to what it looks like from the outside.

I have no idea if people can tell. NTs have told me online they can tell just by the way I talk and other aspies can hardly tell they say. They say I take things literal so that's how they can tell. It's funny really because to other aspies I usually sound normal but to normal people, I sound different. Maybe it's because they have more AS than me so compared to them I am more normal and compared to none aspies I am different it's obvious.

My husband can tell because he lives with me and I think when people see me all the time, they can tell. I don't know if people at work can tell. All I do is clean and how does that show? I also talk to people so I don't know if I am showing anything.

I'd say if people didn't know me, they may think I am rude or shy (which I am) but I do know people can tell right away I see things different, and they have said I am very smart. My office clerk thought I never listened because he somehow expected me to have a savant memory and be psychic and he thought I didn't use my common sense. Since then I have hated the word and took offense to it. Depending on how it's used of course. And one of the managers once told me I am so black and white.

MtDP, most human beings have never heard of AS and have no clear idea what Autism actually means, so how could they possibly just guess out of the clear blue?

I do visibly stim, and for that reason have been asked several times over the years if I was Autistic, but the people who asked were joking in every instance because, like the rest of the ignorant world, they thought Autistic meant 'ret*d with a repetitive body movement', and they could tell I wasn't mentally ret*d.

I don't think its a gender issue, at least not at this point. Even the handful of depictions in popular media lately haven't exactly made Asperger Syndrome a household word, so if people notice quirks and odd behaviors, they're almost invariably going to assume its just you.

Of course it does seem that when AS is depicted in the media, so far its always in a male character. Isn't it ironic that all the fictional autistic adults are male, but the one real life autistic adult receiving significant recognition is Temple Grandin?

If people knew what AS was probably half of them would suspect me, the other half would consider me too normal.

If people know what AS is, I'm the first they think about.

When I met my friend, he knew I'm not normal after 5 days with me. He asked what exactly is with me, maybe ADHD? I said I was dxed with it as a child, but I'm autistic. He said "ok" and that's all. He loves when I stim or rock. Sweet

People who know about it recognize it in me. People who haven't heard about it just say I am eccentric, quirky, weird, funny, smart, or cute.

The people who have lived with me, have had family members on the spectrum, or have been in education, especially, noticed. Those who hadn't heard of it before are saying learning about these traits has been extremely interesting.

Practically no one I know knows what it is, so they don't suspect I have it. Peers think there is something 'off' about me, it seems like guys especially. Or maybe they are just less afraid to say it. I mostly get called rude or bit**y, once got nervous wreck.

Even if someone knew about AS, I don't think they would suspect that I have it. I just seem a little shy and awkward, and some people have said they felt intimidated by how smart I am (though I 'm not a genius or anything).

Then again, when I have a meltdown, then I seem like a ranting crazy person, but I don't know if anyone would suspect AS even then, they probably just think I'm a jackass.