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My older son who is 24 has met a new partner. She's 19 and rather nice - a sweet natured, home-body. My son is really taken by her and often says that he can't believe a girl who isn't a slut is interested in him. Her mom has called me on the phone to meet because she likes to get to know the families of the friends her daughter is keeping because her daughter is on the spectrum. She nearly fell through the floor when I told her that my family is on the spectrum. BUT this woman is already implying that they will marry and have a child...like right away. I don't like this. I want my son to date this girl and NOT be pressured into something unless he wants to be. I told him so and this is what he said that REALLY shocked me. I didn't
think a young man could have such insight!! Here's what he said: "Ahh, ma, don't worry, this girl's mom just wishes she could have another baby. She's too old to do it so she's looking forward to her daughter doing it instead." I NEVER saw it from that point of view. He said he'll date her and that he is currently dating two others and that it would be a miracle if someone moved him so much that he'd think of marriage and starting a family. He simply isn't even financially ready less alone emotionally ready for such a committment. He promised that he'd tell this girl that he does see other people and that he like her to do the same.

When my daughter first started dating her future husband, his mother put me off a bit, too. She started inviting my daughter along to major family events and basically behaving as if Shelli were a future daughter-in-law rather than the 16 year old high school sweetheart of her 17 year old son.

Granted, five years later and she is the new daughter-in-law, but her behavior still seems to me to have been a bit forward. Of course, my daughter tells me that I'm just too reserved.