Female Adult Assessment

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I am going in for assessment, I know I have ASDs--whether I tip some sort of diagnostic scale or not at my age. I keep reading that Aspergirls are very good at masking and passing as normal--until we reach midlife and feel awful about ourselves: false, worthless and unwilling to pretend to be normal any more.

I'm worried that this all important assessment won't capture what I know to be true about me. Professionals aren't trained to capture ASDs in females, let alone females who are full grown and have a lifetime of developing coping mechanisms. This assessment has become everything, because it may get my husband and children to accept the facts about me enough to undergo assessment as well (so that we can employ productive rather than destructive coping strategies). Meanwhile, I'm belittled and hissed at and told none of this can be true--but I know it is.

Tell me, how many of you Aspergirls were diagnosed as adults? Would you be willing to share your story of assessment/DX and help me prepare for how this might go? Good, bad, ugly...I just want to mentally arm myself against the possibilities. Thanks for your help.

I'll let you know how it goes when I get the report results. I had an assessment a few weeks ago -- four hours of testing -- and the neuropsychologist told me at that time that he thinks I just have poor social skills rather than having Asperger's or another form of high-functioning autism, but the DARS office just called me and scheduled an appointment with a councilor rather than just sending me the results, so I'm not sure what's going on now that the scoring is done. He had suggested pragmatics therapy, so maybe they want to arrange something along that line.

I do know that the neuropsychologist was looking for the stereotypical flat affect and voice -- that's why he said I just had poor social skills rather than an ASD, even though he acknowledged my sensory issues and lack of eye contact.

I just recently (within the past year) became aware of the details of AS. And immediately identified. For the next six months or so, I explored the details, the recounts of others, and poked around to the other diagnosees that are related or similar before deciding that it did indeed apply to me.

It took me some time (and outside assistance) to pursue a formal diagnosis - and I have been to that all important first 'interview' with the shrink.

She actually brought two other people into the room. Her assistant (I think he was actually in-training, whatever that's called) and some other woman who's role I didn't really catch and who I for the most part discounted for some reason. I think she may have been announced as a 'counsellor'.

In any case..
They asked about my family doctor. Somehow the topic of how difficult it had been to get a referral came up. Why I felt I hadn't been diagnosed earlier in life. What made me think I had Aspergers (I have a load of reasons, but I drew a total blank and could only name two) and not really much else. They asked about testing I'd had done in the past, about family members and could they contact them. If i'd ever hurt (or thought of) hurting myself or others... Drugs, alcohol, etc. Medications.

I'd suggest going with a list of why you think you have it.
Most doctors hate self-diagnosers (at least around here) but I got the strong impression she would have preferred a prepared list. And I'd been all along planning to bring one.

My suspicions were confirmed when she asked for a written list as homework.
I'm still working on it - right now it's 8 doublesided pages of scribble at various angles and squeezed into emty corners... not terribly presentable.

They don't make a diagnosis on one visit. Be prepared for that.

Edit: OOps. i wound up in the girls' room again. Silly homepage links.

Thank you, I'm hoping they get it right for you. I've learned that females tend to express themselves better and not have as flat an affect as males. This stands to reason, as this is true in the general population as well.

I hope that if this is the only reason you don't get a diagnosis that you will point out the work of Rudy Simone (Aspergirls), Liane Willey (Pretending to Be Normal) and Shana Nichols (Girls Growing Up on the Autism Spectrum). What I'm reading is that most females get misdiagnosed because of some very false assumptions that we should look just like the guys when we present.

Sometimes I want to go get an assessment as an adult just because I'm curious if they'll get it right or not.

I can pass fairly well for NT today in most topical social interactions but I really drove my parents insane when I was younger.

I'm sorry to say but I generally find most in the position of diagnosing neuropsychiatric disorders, to be unqualified in doing so today. I find clinicians who don't really even know how to properly differentiate between OCD and behaviors that might be obsessive and might be compulsive but are not due to OCD at all, and that is probably the easiest, most clear cut disorder in the neuropsychiatric field to identify. So I'm very doubtful that most of them would even be able to properly identify AS, much less AS in a woman.

If I were going for a diagnosis today I would see someone who has extensive background in diagnosing women with AS. I would not choose a run of the mill person who does not specialize in AS.

I was originally diagnosed in 2003 as having "signs of Asperger's", which I felt was unacceptable because it wasn't a Yes/No answer. The psych admitted he had no experience with AS (I was referred by Voc Rehab), and didn't want to make a commitment. Again, unacceptable, but I managed to find work on my own and let it be.

This last year it got on my nerves enough to scour my area for people who have enough experience with Autism to possibly give me a true assessment. It took some doing, because I'm 45 now, and I've definitely developed many coping strategies. I finally, after a couple of consultations that led nowhere (they were more interested in my depression, which turned out to be caused by menopause), found a FEMALE counselor with strong experience in Autism. She came to the conclusion that I am, in fact, AS, albeit "well-adjusted" (coping).

I do think the fact that she is female helped. As a woman, she is more aware of "typical" female traits, and was better able to identify my differences in thought process.

Of course, that's speculation on my part.

I got my diagnosis january 2009, age 35 by then.
It was a department that is specialized in diagnosing adults for AS.
They have a focus on research, not on therapy. I had to deliver lots and lots of papers and tests, including statements of my parents, because the development as a kid is so important.

The result was AS, but well adjusted, so well, that the doctor did not even recommend me for therapy.
I think it is important to find somebody with experience in the Autism field and/or even diagnosing adults.

I am so glad that there is a recent post about the same concerns I'm faced with recently.

I am finally taking the initiative to get diagnosed. I had the same fears going into my first psychiatric (rolled my eyes immediately, want a psychologist, not a shrink) evaluation.

Of course, I have other emotional issues which impede a direct consultation for learning disorders, ASD, and so on. I want the practical stuff! Not the feely stuff. I was immediately discouraged after the meeting, that I drove myself to Barnes & Noble. I read Barthes until I felt better about conceptualizing the idea of 'Asperger's' as a mechanism to carry on. I am not one to summarize or qualify anything. So I took offense to this psychiatric nurse suggesting that I am just "f****d up". Not her words, but mine. It has taken me two years to come to terms with AS. Give me a break, please.

She actually suggested medication. That I hire a tutor (see: person) to help me with academic concerns. And that I consider becoming a "book critic". Seriously?

I scheduled an evaluation with a specialized psychologist, who sounded much more up my alley, on the phone.