The word: Lady

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Anyone else have a problem with the word lady? I know in most contexts it just means women but to me lady has different connotations then just women. Its like the word, "lady-like", it has a more feminine, gender specific connotations. To me its a word that frames the type of behavior I as a women should ideally exhibit. And I dont like that. It kinda bothers me when Im with female friends where theres all females, and they like to refer to themselves as "lovely ladies" or something. Most commonly on fb when theres an pic with all females, theres sometimes a caption about them being ladies and stuff. Idk, I just have a problem with this word, cause often Im not very lady-like. I do exhibit some of female like behavior, I dont feel refined and stuff nor do I care for any gender specific refining. Yet I have that label pinned on me cause Im female and decently groomed in a gender appropriate look. This has nothing to do with the way I actually am. Maybe Im reading too much into this word, I just dont care for it.

i dislike that word. a lot.

it is not flattering for a woman to be called a lady....

i have the same problem withe the word dame (also used in danish and dutch and some other languages)

it is ugly.

Lady makes me think of a woman from the 1800s.
I am not a lady, I am a female.

I like the word Lady in certian contexts, but it may be because I am used to how it is used in the context of third wave feminism. For example Ladyfest, which is an awesome women's rock festival. It was called Ladyfest intentionally, the terminology was selected consciously from the festival founders.

Maybe I know about gender politics, especially with language, but lady is often one of the most loaded terms there is in feminism, but most engendered terminology in feminism is pretty loaded. I mean especially if you are from the school of reclaiming words that were used for opressive reasons such as "girl", for example riotgrrrl and indiepop (which are closely connected) both reclaimed the word girl. I can go on and on with such examples.

The point being is I am not uncomfortable with the word, it is all right by me and I barely find it offensive. Female and Woman are both have the male/man as part of the root of the word. Lady does not it stands alone.

But the historic root of the word and its use also have issues. But one has to recognize that language is ever evolving and that meanings for words are rarely fixed in place, language is constantly redefined. For example, Lady Gaga, she is pretty outragous if you think about it, I would not consider a woman who wears meat dresses to be ladylike in the classical sense of the word. Rather she is participating is participating in redefining the word to mean independant woman (if not a bit more).

I think it depends on the context.
If it's condesending I hate it.

I only have a problem with it when a woman claims she wants to be treated like a lady even though she isn't acting like one.

I have no problem with it, probably because of my renaissance reenactment requiring me to greet people as, "Milord or Milady." It sounds so proper and respectful to me. If it is used in a condescending tone, then no but then again anything said in that tone would be unappealing.

To me, a "lady" is the female equivalent to "gentleman". Perhaps both words are over-used and have lost their impact, but in general I appreciate being considered a "lady", which to me simply means that you treat people right and act with a certain amount of class.

I have more of a problem with 'Sweetie' or 'Dear.' If you're not my parents' age or older, you don't get to use a diminutive on me without being considered condescending.

Yeah ... same with "honey" or "darlin'", although it does depend on the context. Being called a pet name by a lover in the throes of passion is quite different from being called the same thing by some guy at the office.

oh yeah I remember my swim coach used to call all the girls dear constantly, didnt really care for it, especially the way he used it



yeah thats true, how often do we hear men being referred to as gentlemen? Not as often as women are referred to as ladies. To me: this gives a greater expectation for women to act refined.

How many times have I heard my friends use the term "lovely ladies" quite a bit. I think the male equivalent would be "handsome gentlemen", I dont hear that term used that often and when I hear that, its normally by older people.

I reject it for myself, but there are some women who actually fit the mold. My maternal grandmother was a real, southern lady. My paternal grandmother, still living, is the Texan equivalent, which is pretty much the same thing except that it also involves marksmanship, jewelry and hair are larger and more conspicuous, and briscuit is emphasized more than fried chicken. From the time I picked up a tuba, which is physically hard, I knew it was not going to work for me and aspired to being a kind of female gentleman, which is less the male equivalent of a lady than an entirely different construct from when gender roles were more divergent.

I concur.

I also agree.

I dislike the word "lady", because in common and contemporary usage it is always either dismissive or rude. Think of someone saying, "She's quite the little lady" or a man talking about his "old lady", or someone saying, "get out of here, lady!"
It is slightly less loaded in the plural, as in "Good night, ladies."

I'm pretty neutral with the word lady. It can be used in a condescending matter, but it usually isn't nowadays. (At least where I live.)

I have a lot bigger problem with adult women being called girls. I hear this too often, but nobody ever refers to adult men as boys unless it's a joke. Just listen to someone talk about a woman's accomplishments some time, and you'll notice it if you pay attention.

I don't particularly like the word females either, because I've read too often in scholarly journals about how a 'man has multiple females chasing after her' or something along those lines. The equivalent to man for professional writing is woman, not female. Female just indicates the gender of an animal. I'd prefer not to be lumped in with female frogs when being referred to. But that's just me...