Afraid of looking like someone who everyone hates

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Because of my lack of enthusiasm to do anything with my hair, I'm always afraid I look like someone who the public hates. Where I come from, most rough slobs who end up in prison by doing bad things and get their faces shown all over the newspapers seem to have a ''skanky'' sort of appearence. They are unattractive, don't have a hairstyle, don't wear any make-up, and have this flat expression on their face. One of them is the mother of Shannon Matthews, Karen somebody. I think people who live in the UK will most likely know who she is. The public all think she is disgusting of what she done, and her face used to be all over the newspapers at one point and even on the news. And sometimes I worry that I look like her, since I have the same colour hair as her, with it just tucked behind my ears and hanging long, and I don't wear no make-up and I have this pale, miserable face - and sometimes I wonder if people think I'm this woman when they walk by, which is why they look at me funny, then realise I'm not her, and so look away again. Even when I'm on the bus, people in the street look in the bus at me as though they're thinking, ''oh, I thought I saw Shannon Matthew's mother sitting on that bus - what's she doing out of prison?!'' because I don't see them look at anyone else in the bus, I just seem to catch their eye - even though I see other people gawping out and would think it's easier for them to catch pedestrian's eye, but apparently it isn't, so the only reason for that is I look like Shannon Matthew's mother.

It is bugging me so much that it's now time for me to pluck up the courage to get my hair styled. I find having a blank hairstyle is easier to maintain, but not so easy when you walk down the street because you get spotted and mistaken for these unattractive criminals, so I've just got to look my hairdresser straight in the eyes and say, ''can you please give me some suggestions of which hairstyle to have but nothing too extreme, just enough to make my impression a bit better.'' And maybe they could give me some ideas and I can go away and have a think about it. I have started wearing lipstick, which seems to make a lot of difference. I'm already slim and I always wear nice clothes so I don't need to change that.

I have long hair also, and it is easier to just leave it down and brush it. I know exactly what you mean by the skanky look. I think that to look skanky, you need to also have the appearance of a lack of personal care. If your hair is clean and brushed, then that is not going to fall under "skank". Theirs is usually dirty/stringy, or unbrushed. Also, you can go without makeup without looking skanky, and I think facial expression has a lot to do with that. Looking alert and friendly goes a long way toward not looking skanky. Clothing that fits and is clean and not too "down at the heels" is another factor. Jeans and tshirts that don't look like they have been worn for days, or are wrinkled and that do fit can help prevent the skanky look from coming in to play.

One thing I do with my hair when I leave it down, is I put on a pair of sunglasses, then put them on top of my head. It holds my hair back nicely and it's quick to do as I leave the house. There are lots of quick and easy updo tutorials on YouTube that you can look at. Most of the time, I have found with an updo, if you take five or ten minutes in the morning to put it up and spray it, you don't have to do anything to it for the rest of the day.

As for makeup, if your skin is nice then just a little powder, some lip gloss and one coat of mascara can give you a more finished look. That takes less than five minutes and no makeup skills at all. YouTube tutorials for makeup are also good if you want to put on more, but don't know how.

Something else I have noticed about skanks is nails. Your nails don't have to be done, but they should at least be filed if they are long so they are shaped, or if you don't want to do that you should cut them. Nothing says skank faster than chipped up nail polish or on hands with no polish, nails of different length that aren't at all shaped, or dirty nails. One must do about nails that I'm guilty of not doing is if you paint your toenails, make sure you take it off as it gets chipped or your nails start growing out, especially if you are wearing sandals or open toe shoes. I'm bad about forgetting my toenails and it looks terrible to leave it like that. By chipped, I am not talking about a small chip here and there, I'm talking about chipped so bad that half of it's gone off of each nail.

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I'm giving it another shot. We will see.
My forum is still there and everyone is welcome to come join as well. There is a private women only subforum there if anyone is interested. Also, there is no CAPTCHA.

The link to the forum is http://www.rightplanet.proboards.com

How do UK folk feel about the hotel inspector (Alex Polizzi)? I've just realised how much I look like her and I'll not get my hair cut shorter whilst she's on TV so much. She used to pop up in the middle of other programmes, in the bottom right hand corner of the screen, almost like a translator for deaf viewers. That was quite spooky for a while, seeing 'me' on TV.

What about cutting your hair shorter if you don't like to style it? It's cheaper than going to a stylist. Also, once you get your hair styled, you will probably have to do some work to keep the style looking fresh, so getting it styled is not going to be an easy way out.

Do not wear makeup! It can cause acne by clogging your pores, much of it is tested on animals, and some of it even consists of ground up insects (assuming you don't want dead bugs on your face). It also wastes a huge amount of your time to put on and can make you look worse if you are not skilled at using it. Getting enough water and sleep, eating a healthy diet, and avoiding stress can improve the condition of your skin, which can make your face look more appealing.

I feel it like in the sense, i feel like i try to always please everybody, fearing not being liked for some people, ..