Should I tell him?

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My problem is this:
I had a terrible childhood. I was abused emotionally,physically and sexually. I was also raped when I was fourteen and have had only one relationship as an adult. We did have sex but I never enjoyed it. Mostly because I didn't like him that much ( I thought that I should at least try it) and also because I had and still don't have any idea what to do when I have sex. I just spaced out and waited for it to be over. I haven't had a relationship or sex sense. I have dealt with the abuse. I have talked about it with some of the people who abused me and even been apologised to. In every day life I'm calm laid back and strong. I thought I was over it. So imagine my surprise when it all came back to bite me in the ass. I started pming with a fellow on this site and things are going well. It's just that he wants to meat and obviously he is going to want to have sex at some point. I want to have sex! I do in fact have a very strong libido. But the thought of actually having sex terrifies me. I guess I could suppress my fear and just go for it but if I did I would most probably just lie there and space out. Nobody is going to enjoy that! Also, it would be embarrassing I mean I'm in my thirties and he probably expects me to have experience in this area. I had no idea that starting to date would open this all up again. That I would react this way. I really do want to have a normal sexual relationship. I really like this guy, so far anyway. So what do I do now?

It kind of depends on a few factors. Perhaps the most important one being how comfortable you are talking about it. Beyond that it sounds like you have some trauma to work through, and it might be that what you need is to talk about it, either indeed with the guy in question, or with a friend you know you can trust, or with a professional psychologist. In either case there's the risk of getting a bad one, but there's also the chance of a breakthrough. In a best case scenario, you and the guy can work through it together at a sensible pace. That is, if he's understanding. If he's not, well, then that's always good to know. But there's also the possible competence issue, which is where a good psychologist might come in handy. But make sure it's a sex-positive psychologist. (For a psychologist to have a religiously motivated bias against sexual liberation is somewhat rare, but not unheard of, and definitely something to look out for as it does sound like your goal is - quite reasonably - to feel more comfortable with your sexuality, and not less.)

Happy to be of help. And glad to hear it's going well so far. May it continue on that track, good luck!