Eye Contact

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Has anyone been able to overcome the eye contact thing?

Welcome to Wrong Planet.

Partially yes....but not until I was around 30 years old. Practice on someone you feel the most comfortable with - even a relative.
You may not be able to maintain it and it can be scary at first. Try for a few seconds at a time. Once you can do that, practice on other people. If you can't do it at all, perhaps try wearing sunglasses while you practice.

Still trying to overcome it.

Sometimes difficult but easy for others.

I can actually make pretty good eye contact most of the time.
When I was first diagnosed my eye contact was terrible.
Tell yourself that you don't have aspergers and it will be easier.
When someone looks at you then you should look into their eyes.
That's really the only time eye contact is important.
Use a mirror to practice with yourself.

I'm trying to "sort out" my eye contact problem at the moment and have been given a "trick" to practise: look at the person between the eyes- it will seem like you are doing eye contact even when you are not.
The only problem now is the how often question- I can't just stare at them can I?!

Just remember that you don't have to maintain eye contact the whole time, just on and off otherwise you look crazed. It ain't easy but you can do it if you practice.

Eyecontact when people are talking to me is not that much of a problem anymore, I think i tend to "stare" too much sometimes tough. The biggest issue for me is how people stare when I am speaking to them. I get so distracted when people are smiling and nodding to what i am saying (women seem to be doing this more than men). It freaks me out and I try to find a way to finish my sentence quickly.

Honestly, I've never had a problem with eye contact. It just comes naturally to me.

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Last edited by comawhite on 01 Feb 2012, 11:32 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I never noticed it until I was sitting in my manager's office and there were three people sitting in front of me and I had to tell myself to focus.

I work at a Subway. I look at the customer when they first step up to me, but as soon as I have something to do I don't look up from the beginning of the sandwich to taking their money and handing them the finished product. I'm quite awful with it and I tried to fix it a few times, but decided I didnt get paid enough to look people in the eye.

Once my dad picked me up and gave me a ride and I didn't notice he had shaved off his beard until we reached our destination and I got out of the car. I kinda staggered from the surprise and then it was really awkward.

Not really, though if someone earns my trust I am usually able to at least give them some eye contact.............but if I don't know someone its severely uncomfortable to make eye contact.

I started doing it pretty good in my teens and by my 20s I did find. I had read somewhere that maintaining eye contact shows assertiveness, and I wanted to be assertive, so that was one of the things I worked on. As it is now, if I am in a verbal confrontation with someone (not screaming or insulting match) they will be the first to look away.

Most of the time I can make eye contact fine. If I get stressed, or get into an involved conversation I end up pacing and staring at the floor. It's the only way I can focus on getting the words out correctly.

Yep. Many places I've read it seems that it is actually not recommended to keep eye contact all the time, it's awkward for both parties. During the few seconds I look away every now and then, I've conditioned myself so that I can get rid of any nervousness or stress in that short period of time before continuing eye contact again.
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I stare. I had it drilled into me as a child to look at people when they talk to you. One of my things in my diagnosis is "too intense gaze". I stare but I don't actually look at eyes and stare at peoples noses.

It doesn't help that I forget to blink when really excited and talking about a special interest.

It was a shock to me when I realised after a few weeks of dating my boyfriend what colour his eyes are.