I've had it!

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My mom allowed me to slip up and order a frappe and a burger last night. I really want to be a lady. Ladies don't scarf down burgers and drink frappes. I want to eat salad, yogurt, tea and sparkling water.

I got all dressed up today to go to JCpenney. I'm wearing a white tank top under a white cherry print blouse, bootcut jeans, boat shoes(The brand is called Sperry). I put a lot of effort into my jewelry and makeup.

I'm obsessed with maintaining a feminine figure(I was SO unhealthy at 220-235 pounds) and I just want to ask my mom, would she rather have the vain, prissy girl I've become or some improper girl who wears band tees and sneakers?

Don't go starving yourself into one of those many hideous looking skeletons that are walking around out there. Eat healthy, but enough of it. And don't forget to get protein, fruit, and whole grains, or taters with skins, or sweet taters with skin, with meals. You can skip the whole grains in some meals by substituting beans or nuts for them, and also cut down on other proteins in the same meals, as nuts and beans have features of both proteins and grains in their make-up. Also, don't forget to eat stuff with calcium to maintain your bones, and to avoid osteoporosis.

I suggest you skip the sparkling water and just drink plain filtered water, or real juice. Carbonation leaches calcium from your bones and teeth, so sparkling water and sodas are bad for you, and sodas have sugar or toxic alternatives in them, and some of the colorants are toxic, too.

I think part of your problem is that the "healthy" meal you described really isn't that healthy, as it doesn't provide enough nutrients, or enough bulk, so it leaves you feeling hungry. Try adding a hard boiled egg, or some low fat hard cheese to the meal, and eat some meals with lean meats, like lean beef, poultry, and fish. Also add some bulky fruits like apples, pears, other tree fruits, or part of a bunch of grapes. These will also help fill you up.

Ladies do eat burgers. I've been to many a Junior League BBQ where the ladies eat burgers, also ribs. Junior Leagers are pretty much the ultimate ladies.

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I'm giving it another shot. We will see.
My forum is still there and everyone is welcome to come join as well. There is a private women only subforum there if anyone is interested. Also, there is no CAPTCHA.

The link to the forum is http://www.rightplanet.proboards.com

Ladies - strike that - Women eat whatever they choose to eat. Why are you blaming your mother for your choice in what to eat?

If you leave the mayo off the burger (scrape as much as you can off if it's already there), that will shave quite a few calories, and I've found that if it has fresh lettuce and tomato I never miss the mayo. You could remove the top bun and eat it open face and that would shave even more. I don't know what a frappe is, is that a beverage? You can always just drink water.

No one really wants to be fat, but it has nothing to do with being a lady, it has more to do with your body, your stress levels, and your choices. We don't choose our metabolisms or even our upbringing, but most parents do the best they know how, and if that happens to be not quite the right choice for a given child, all the child can really do is grow up and make their own choices.

I suggest you do your best to take charge of your choices, and don't lay blame where it doesn't belong. There's no use in blaming even yourself, anyway. When I do that it just sets my cravings on edge, makes me feel that I have to suffer to look good. I don't! I can choose to eat something light, tasty and healthy, and if someone else doesn't like it, that's their problem. But frankly I could not exist on yogurt, salad and tea. Sparkling water isn't very good for you anyway, the carbon dioxide in it acidifies the water.

To the poster above: a lot of people with AS live with their parents long into adulthood and are pretty much dependent on them for food, clothes, etc. Not all autistics manage to be self-sufficient. The OP doesn't say if she is or not. If her parents are the ones buying the food, she may not have much of a say about what she eats.

OP, I do not understand what you are trying to say when you say you want to be "a lady."

Do you mean you feel as though eating certain foods or being a certain weight will make you feel more "female?" If so, that is wrong. Your gender is determined by your DNA. It is not determined by your weight or diet.

Or perhaps you mean you want to be a lady in the sense of being more refined. If so, I don't really think diet has very much to do with that.

When it comes to being a lady in that sense, it's not not about what you eat, but how you eat it. A lady (in the sense of a gentlewoman) is defined by good manners. It used to be about breeding as well as manners, but I don't suppose anybody cares about breeding much nowadays. Therefore, you can eat a hamburger and still be a lady, as long as you are not burping, belching, talking with your mouth full, spraying crumbs everywhere, etc.

I've weighed 200lbs and I've weighed 100lbs (I'm 4'10" so 200lbs is morbidly obese). and I've learned one VERY important lesson... it's ok to eat a burger and to have a frappe every once in awhile. If you don't indulge then you wind up snapping and eating ALL of the burgers and ALL of the frappes. So sacrifice one burger and one frappe once a week (or every two weeks) so that the rest of the burgers and frappes can continue to survive and thrive without fear of a burger/frappe apocalypse...

^ That's such a nice post, and wise.

if you workout 3 times a week, lift weight, you wont ever have to worry about eating what you want.

so, just do that!

I eat burgers, pizza, hot wings and today, a little chocolate shake. I even spill food on myself and have been called nothing but a lady. It's all about how you carry yourself and your mannerism. If you want to be a lady, be a lady whether in jeans or dresses.