The Gas-lighting of Women and Girls on the Autism Spectrum

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http://seventhvoice.wordpress.com/2014/ ... -spectrum/

The whole article applies to men too

Wow. This is exactly my experience. I think I might cry. I knew this on an intellectual level, but something about reading this article let me finally admit to myself that my suffering was not my fault. Thank you so much for posting this, guys. I'll be sharing it all over my social networks.

The byproxygaslighting being all there is left ;
Makes returning back quite attractive - the comfort of domestic abuse !
Now I've got three warrants of neighbors, even if people make things up you still stand accused ! !
I went to see the mayor about it but she thought I had no rights when it was possible that I was breaking some law of having my(sic, never something is mine but responsibilities yes then it's mine) hay not trimmed!
Now I fear she higher my taxes, I shouldn't have asked, that embarressed her obviously.

This applies to all females everywhere; the non-autistic ones just conform more easily and thus cope better.

You are very welcome. Glad to be helpful.

Definitely familiar. I still get nervous talking about what music I like unless I'm sure the other person likes the same music (and I will try to only mention known overlap) because at school the acceptable answer to that question was always only a very short list which didn't even completely correlate to what was in the charts at the time so was a nightmare to work out (and I probably wouldn't like it anyway).

An interesting possible insight into why diagnosis in girls is so low, doctors seem overly to keen to diagnose everything as depression, maybe this is amplified in women.

GL takes many forms, IOW you can't shake a stick at a lot of them.

Really powerful article, I hope it gets a wide readership here. While I agree that the processes of discounting the article describes are real - and so damaging for the women who experience them, maybe "systematic invalidation" or even "alienation" would be more apt terms to describe what is going on. Gaslighting now is used more in relation to NPD - its one of the favourite tactics of cluster B narcissists. On the other hand, narcissists are drawn to any profession that increases their power over others, so mental "health" is one area they do seem to be drawn to. So maybe gaslighting is apt - maybe all three terms are apt, it's a combination of invalidation and gaslighting that increases the alienation of many women on the spectrum who have suffered from professional abuse of power by mental health personnel.

Thanks for the post APOM. Diagnosis and its dangers - we have tried to have a comprehensive discussion of these matters in other boards and wow did those threads show some true colours... it really saddened me to see what some people wrote, how dismissive they were of the dangers that lurk in the diagnostic process, and the at times vicious smears at the self-diagnosed. I nearly left over it.

Sam Vaknin for what it is, but he's not wrong here, in my experience. When I went to see the docter for a possible solution for a safe place he said I was hysterical and after insisting I found out there was not such a thing in france, the only thing there is, is they will take away your children, there is no such a thing for woman at all. Even worse the social worker(a woman) informed me that leaving would take away all my rights.(which was untrue and actually quite mean)
With my first pregnancy I was very beaten up when a controling(for workabsense) docter advised me a safetyhome for abused woman(in holland) and my partner taken, a little later into a mental hospital for drug-induced psychosis, my 'father in law' found me an appt, partner released quite soon and excuses and promises and so on. But not any psychological back up or nothing, so there's the bomb still lying underground. Well going on for the good and bad, not too bad, he being truckdriver so not too present, but at times very tense. But then working less and eventually getting early retirement(=heathproblems), and strange 'friends' who admired him and saw me as some unclean doormat, than you just don't understand what's going on. When my mother was to die I went over for some days and when I returned the whole house was changed. Then my daughter went missing, and those 'friends' would turn their back on me and discussing with him how he felt about it.
And then I wasn't given the chance, it was deliberately taken from me, to go clear out my mothers appartment and later blamed that all that work caused his heartattack. Even when I left he got himself another incident, playing the victim of my cruelty!
I'm sorry for the personal story, again, but there a not so much safe places for those stories, and specially not in the professional sector. I even got refused at the psychopathforum, well I don't think he's that too, but it puts some kind of order in the events.

I hear you. I have heard this and far worse accounts from victims of the system.

This article describes my experience accurately. I like the term gas-lighting as there is an element of dismissal of one's mental experience and self-knowlege. And an attempt to force conformity based on it.

It doesn't 100% apply to me personally, but I know how gaslighting feels. I was diagnosed at an early age (5 years old, AND a girl!), but on top of that, I was abused as a child. Not only was I constantly dragged to the special ed room in Kindergarten, but I was also dealing with my biological father brainwashing and molesting me at the same time and later on telling me that what I remember wasn't even true. On top of that, I had to deal with bullying and trying to understand what was even happening in my life. *sigh* My childhood was crazy.

I am glad this article proved helpful and is going to be spread around.

The article is not about how it is done to autistic women per say but about the tactic itself and the after effects
http://counsellingresource.com/features/2014/03/25/gaslighting-revisited-a-closer-look-at-this-manipulation-tactic/

I can't tell what is gas-lighting and what is not, I don't know why it is called gas-light.
I don't think I am susceptible to gas-lighting, as I am unlikely to automatically believe what others tell me.
It is much more likely that I think they are crazy than thinking that I am.

the term came from the old movie "gaslight" where the husband was trying to drive his wife insane by doing things like gradually turning down the "gaslights" in their home, but denying that he was doing that.