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Does Sexual Intercourse Satisfy You?
Yes, sexual intercourse alone is satisfying. 47%  47%  [ 22 ]
Sexual intercourse if combined with oral sex is satisfying. 23%  23%  [ 11 ]
Intercourse is never satisfying. 30%  30%  [ 14 ]
Total votes : 47

androbot01
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31 Jan 2016, 10:48 am

For me, intercourse is never satisfying. Even with men I am attracted to. Oral sex is okay, but only with someone I like. I do have intercourse in my current relationship, but not because I enjoy it. But rather, because my friend-with-benefits is useful to have around and I fear losing the friendship if I didn't have sex with him.
I have given up on a satisfying sexual relationship, not because I dislike men, but because I just can't take someone seriously after they have had sex with me. It's like they have used me as some sort of waste receptacle.

How is intercourse for you guys? Does anyone else have intercourse for practical reasons? I figure most women probably enjoy it, but I am curious.



Amity
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31 Jan 2016, 11:11 am

It depends.
Nothing sexual can happen without an emotional connection to the person, and for it to be satisfying I have to be relaxed and in the mood. If all three are present, then yes it is generally satisfying.

Has intercourse ever been satisfying for you androbot?



androbot01
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31 Jan 2016, 11:15 am

Amity wrote:
Has intercourse ever been satisfying for you androbot?

No. I can't think of one instance. I find it intrusive and burdensome. It's just work to me.



HisMom
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31 Jan 2016, 11:56 am

Some friend, if he would stop being "friends" with you if you didn't have sex with him ! ! Is this something that he actually said to you or is it just an assumption on your part ? If he actually said this to you, then he's only using you for sex and will terminate your "friendship" anyway, if / when he makes a new female "friend".

What exactly are you getting out of this "relationship" that makes you so afraid to lose this guy ? If you want platonic friendships with males without them expecting to have sex with you, how about becoming friends with gay men ?


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androbot01
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31 Jan 2016, 12:57 pm

HisMom wrote:
Some friend, if he would stop being "friends" with you if you didn't have sex with him ! ! Is this something that he actually said to you or is it just an assumption on your part ? If he actually said this to you, then he's only using you for sex and will terminate your "friendship" anyway, if / when he makes a new female "friend".

What exactly are you getting out of this "relationship" that makes you so afraid to lose this guy ? If you want platonic friendships with males without them expecting to have sex with you, how about becoming friends with gay men ?

He has never outright said the friendship is dependent on sex, but over my 15 years of knowing him, I have found this to be the case.
He's the only friend I can rely on for several things. And if we cease to be friends I will be on my own completely. I've got my Mom, but at 73 she needs me to be a caregiver.
So yeah I value his friendship even though it necessitates sex. I use to have feelings for this guy when we first hooked up, but over the years less so. He's a "Peter Pan" - he'll never grow up. So it's a trade-off.
But even when I was married (many years ago,) my husband would always sulk and be unpleasant when I wouldn't have sex. So I did to keep him in a good mood.
I wish men didn't want sex so much, it makes them dependent and untrustworthy because they will try to coerce you into it. You never know if they really care about you.



cathylynn
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31 Jan 2016, 1:07 pm

at least half of women need direct clitoral stimulation to reach climax. if intercourse is not done in a position that a woman can manually stimulate her clitoris during it, she will tend to be sexually frustrated.



androbot01
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31 Jan 2016, 1:09 pm

cathylynn wrote:
at least half of women need direct clitoral stimulation to reach climax. if intercourse is not done in a position that a woman can manually stimulate her clitoris during it, she will tend to be sexually frustrated.

So why would one bother with the guy unless there were other practical reasons?



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31 Jan 2016, 1:27 pm

the brain is the most influential sex organ. if a woman is attracted to a man, due to being in love or physical attraction or whatever, her experience will be enhanced. plus, there can be something nice about just being close to someone.



0_equals_true
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31 Jan 2016, 2:10 pm

Personally, I don't think you should continue with the relationship.

Do you actually care about sex, whether it is satisfying or not?

Either way I don't think you should continue. I know you said you rely on this guy, but maybe it is fear of the unknown that is stopping you.



androbot01
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31 Jan 2016, 2:13 pm

0_equals_true wrote:
Do you actually care about sex, whether it is satisfying or not?

I'm not sure I understand. What should I care about with regard to sex. For me it is a commodity which I can trade for things I need.



0_equals_true
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31 Jan 2016, 2:20 pm

androbot01 wrote:
0_equals_true wrote:
Do you actually care about sex, whether it is satisfying or not?

I'm not sure I understand. What should I care about with regard to sex. For me it is a commodity which I can trade for things I need.


It is a straight question if you enjoy the idea of it, or are interested in it.

Trading things for sex, whether you intended to be that way is reciprocal. If in the past men have used coorecion that is one thing, this is another you are in part using them. Unless I'm missing something. At least there is some level of reciprocation, even if it not something that is in a typical relationship or even FWB.

Do you even enjoy their company?

However it is not something that sounds particularly healthy in your case. You don't sound too happy about it. You should stop.



androbot01
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31 Jan 2016, 2:24 pm

0_equals_true wrote:
Do you even enjoy their company?

Sometimes we talk about stuff and I enjoy that.



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31 Jan 2016, 2:43 pm

androbot01 wrote:
0_equals_true wrote:
Do you even enjoy their company?

Sometimes we talk about stuff and I enjoy that.


Especially with them? Or would you be happy to talk with someone else, if they were of interest?

Does this person see himself as FWB, or does did he have more serious intentions at some point?

If he really want a relationship with you and you don't feel the same way you should stop If you are in a mutual FWB situation (with the trade of in your case), and you aren't enjoying it, you should stop.

You are scared about stopping correct?



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31 Jan 2016, 2:48 pm

I'm not saying you are asexual, but you may prefer an asexual companion or just a normal friendship.

You can 'trade' companionship for help. It is part of a normal friendship. However you also have to be willing to do something for them. Not sex but something that would help them. that is how it works.

Believe me I don't understand the in and outs of reciprocal friendship for a long time, I figured it out eventually.

Nothing is totally selfless. However if it doesn't make you happy it is not worth doing.



androbot01
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31 Jan 2016, 3:09 pm

I guess it's a mutually beneficial arrangement. I'll take what I can get.



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31 Jan 2016, 3:12 pm

androbot01 wrote:
I guess it's a mutually beneficial arrangement. I'll take what I can get.


Ok but then you are saying you are happy with the arrangement. I wasn't getting that impression.

I get more that you are stuck in a rut.