Has your personal style ever attracted the wrong people?

Post Reply New Topic

I love the color blue, so I dyed my hair blue. I also kind of like the Asian aesthetic. I feel comfortable wearing Asian clothing. I also have a slightly Asian looking face. This has made me a huge anime geek magnet. The problem with that is that I'm not into anime or geek culture at all. The only animea I can name are Naruto, Bleach and Pokemon(not sure if it's anime.) I haven't watched any episodes. I just think the anime aesthetic suits me. I don't dress up as any specific anime character. Does anyone else have this problem? Where the way you want to look conflicts with the people you want to attract? By attract I mean friendships and relationships.

My "personal style" makes the "wrong people" very angry, fortunately; they're not attracted to me.

Honestly, I don't find the OP's style to be strange at all.

I just feel that she's a bit self-conscious.

i present as lowkey grungy-goth and that can sometimes attract other people who wear dark tattered clothes and like bands which i probably hate but i wouldn't necessarily say these are the "wrong" people. i'm just not a fan of avenged sevenfold lol

That sounds better than attracting shutin anime lovers.

How are they shut-ins if they are outside?

What's wrong with people that like anime? I know loads of anime fans (some that might be referred to as 'otaku') that are actually quite well balanced as people. I went to uni with people that would make these beautiful hand crafted cosplay outfits of the characters in their favourite shows and the amount of dedication and talent that they put into this hobby was really impressive to me. The closest thing to cosplay I've ever done was dressing up as a zombie for Halloween.

I don't "attract" people like that, per se, but I do often find myself in those social circles a lot. I don't consider myself strictly "geeky", but I guess some people would call me a geek. Heck, I'm wearing a Weird Al shirt right now, so I guess I'm a daywalker.

I think all sorts of people from all sorts of groups feel comfortable around me because I don't immediately judge them. I think because I don't fret much over my appearance others feel more comfortable because they don't think I'm too high maintenance to try too hard around me. Also, I pretty much talk to everyone the same way so that helps.

I guess that's why people like that approach you. They feel safe around you, probably.

I've always attracted the kinds of people that I don't feel are compatible with my personality. I don't know if it's my style for sure, but there is something about me that attracts the wrong kind of people. You're not alone.

In school super awkward guys and the occasional special needs guys were attracted to me. Nothing wrong with either. I just need to meet guys on my level as far as functioning goes.

You probably come across as "nice". Girls and women who dress more modest and low key will give off this aura.

When I showed this picture of me on dating sites I attracted a way wider variety of men. That included generic bros, but also well balanced extroverted types. They were also a bit more ethnic.

I used to like jeans, tshirts and used flannel shirts like jackets. Most of the people I wound up attracting were stoners, drug addicts and drunks. I have no desire to do that kind of stuff. When I tried to fit in with girls in the 80s most of the styles were lacey and Madonna inspired and then all the sexual liberation crowd was trying to get me into that. I wasn't interested in sex. When I decided I would dye my hair purple because I like the color and because I like to wear dark clothing the goth crowd decided I was Goth. I like some punk bands but am mostly into jazz and orchestral music. The thing about the Goth crowd I didn't like was how they trivialized depression and suicide. Honestly I just want to be comfortable.I like shirts and slacks, no makeup and dressing plain. I am not making a political statement when I wear a hoodie, cut my hair short, dye my hair a different color, wear dark clothing or enjoy rainbow colored titanium earrings. I just like these things. I am not trying to copy any group's style or copy anyone I was previously friends with because my hair happens to be similar to theirs. I was yelled at by someone who apparently 'owns' the red hair dye color and felt marginalized by me deciding to dye my hair red due to the fact that it is closer to my natural color when I was young. Honestly I have come to the conclusion that most people are irrational and I need to protect myself from their creepiness.

So then dress that way more often.

I usually dress pretty metal-goth with a slight tinge of grunge, I get some odd looks in public but I'm not bothered.
Often I attract annoying people questioning me about my band shirts or hair who are very every day ordinary kind of people. It's usually annoying because they'll only be talking to me because they think it's funny and are trying to show off to their friends.

I CANNOT stand when people touch me though, like they'll touch my hair because it's a different colour or style and it's like OMG STOP IT'S WEIRD.

Frankly though I'm rather used to it after many years of dealing with idiots. I've even had people pretend to be my friend just cause they thought I was 'cool looking' and different so they could be narcissistic about it, like "look at me I have cool 'friends'" which honestly is the worst.

The best thing to do with these people is figure them out, see what their intentions are, if they are bad then remove them from your life.

Here is my experience. One time I had awesome dreadlock like[url]http:///[/url]
I did was for the most part stop wearing Rasta colors when I first got mine because I didn't want to be confused with a Trustafarian. As I became confident with mine I started wearing the colors even though I'm not a Rasta. I also read up and found out what dreads meant in other cultures including Rastafarianism, Indian Sadhus, Vikings, Scots, etc. I also tried to understand what the dreads mean to me in case I did catch flack.
While we are on the subject of stereotypes I've had 2 other interesting things happen to me. I used to work in an inner city youth program. Before and after work people would either ask me for drugs, ask me if I wanted drugs, or get real quiet as they thought I was an undercover Narc.

Last edited by B19 on 03 Dec 2019, 1:27 pm, edited 1 time in total.: spammer

Its very likely because in anime they have brightly coloured hair, like blue or green or pink.

I get hit on by middle aged guys so I don't know what that says about the way I look

Trophy wife material?

Just kidding, some of them tend to hit on everything (mid-life crisis and what not), sp don't take it to heart

Maybe