Why good girls like bad boys

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Finally an answer: Bad boys (sociopaths) have very big egos and lots of self-confidence - even worse, if you add a little more than a just lick of intelligence to the sociopath, you get a rather "charming" psychopath. When a woman sees or "senses" a self-confident male, she sees "protection" but in the animal sense. Protection makes women feel sexually safe but in no way, shape, or form are they safe with sociopaths. That's why good girls go for bad boys. Another tool a sociopath uses to control a woman if he can't seem to make her feel safe, is a "place". He keeps on putting her in that "place" so he can control and take advantage of her. That place can be a church, an organization, a gang, some sort of group, etc... Use your imagination. Socio's got a lot of tricks up their sleeves. It's 2017, we're not back in 50,000 b.c. to where we have to sniff out a confident male to protect us and besides, it's would NOT even be that male that protects you, it would be the harem that you're just a part of. Never underestimate a tried and true friend. Never sacrifice her for a guy and his pee-pee. It will lead to If you want love , consider that awkward guy who blushes around you and makes an idiot of himself. Unattractiveness is a thing you can get used to. After a while, you won't even notice. Leave the sociopaths to the other sociopaths. Perhaps they will reciprocally kill each other.

Nice Guys threads count: 1,000,0002

You're oversimplifying things. Sociopaths look nice from the outside, they come over as charming and caring, but they slowly isolate and destroy a person. Once they've cut her off from her friends and family and made her dependent on him it's too late. She realises what he is and she's alone.

You'll find that it's often women who lack self confidence who end up with these guys. They've flattered that this man has actually taken an interest in them. Afterall, they keep getting told that "if a guy likes you, you'll know about it" This is the first guy who's really made an effort with her. She is bowled over and falls for him.

It's happened to friends of mine. They didn't realise what they were getting into. They are now divorced.

Maybe if the shy guys had shown some interest this wouldn't have happened.

The answer for shy guys then is to distribute more hugs & be vocal. Girls get ahead of themselves too, we should all stay in the habit of calling that out.

_________________
"Standing on a well-chilled cinder, we see the fading of the suns, and try to recall the vanished brilliance of the origin of the worlds."
-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos

Sociopaths also come in a dependent/needy/seemingly vulnerable and passive variety that appeal to maternal/caring feelings. I'd say this is a more deadly variety because they seem so harmless. They still use manipulation and control to the max, narcissistic conversation techniques that confuse their partners, gaslighting and all that horrible stuff.

Their sense of entitlement is huge and they don't feel guilty about their parasitic lifestyles. Maybe it sounds a bit more like a female sociopath, but there are guys like that too. They seek out strong, capable women who on the other hand are caring, nurturing, but also... naive and with hidden vulnerabilities that can be later exploited.

They don't seem like bad boys at all, more like this shy, cute and slightly lost person who needs healing/looking after.

I'm not exactly sure how / why the OP equates "bad boy" with "Sociopath"----when I think of a "bad boy", "Johnny", from "Dirty Dancing", comes-to-mind, and he, IMO, was, maybe, the OPPOSITE of a Sociopath, and very like the "bad boys" I've experienced, in that they "present" themselves as tough, because they are anything, but confident in themselves. I'd take a "bad boy" like Johnny, any day of the week, and twice on Sundays, cuz they're often pussy-cats, underneath, and know how to genuinely treat / respect a woman / others.

Conversely, IME, the "good guys" are more often the Sociopaths----having HUGE egos, and presenting themselves as good / confident, with an ulterior motive, to use and abuse.

Women like the idea of the bad boy persona...they equate "bad boy" with good times.

But women that really are involved with bad boys are most likely scratching their heads wondering when those good times are going to begin.

And women that submit to this treatment willingly ...well they are the same ones that are building that dungeon in their basement for their "bad boy" should he ever decide to leave.... (OK I watch Criminal Minds way too much)

^

I guess some people can reconcile & get on down with their bad selves.

_________________
"Standing on a well-chilled cinder, we see the fading of the suns, and try to recall the vanished brilliance of the origin of the worlds."
-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos

I liked someone relitively recently that some of my friends pegged as a bad boy, which isn't entirely fair because he has a lot of good qualities and I found him quite encouraging to talk to. He's not a sociopath, but he is immature and filled with angst. I could relate to the angstiness and I thought that maybe someone who doesn't measure up to whatever my friends decide is "good" would actually be more accepting of the real me. Maybe my self esteem was low at the time. Anyway, I feel like we equally messed each other around because we are both the same kind of broken.

Does that make him a bad boy? Does that make me bad? I don't think so, I think that we are just both human and just trying to do our best and it didn't really work out.

People can't generally be labelled bad and good.

I have noticed that it is very rare that two nice, like-minded people get together. Usually there is a combination of nice girl/bad boy or nice guy/mean girl. If two like-minded people get together, it tends to be two equally contentious people who get into loud, screaming, sometimes physical fights.

Listen to "Leader of the Pack" by the Shangri-Las---a prime example of a "vulnerable bad boy." He was so vulnerable that the died in a motorcycle crash. The girlfriend saw all through this "bad boy's" vulnerability. And she suffered because of it.