If looks could kill..

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Me mum once said to me when I was about 12 or 13: "Men dont have to be strinkingly hansome to be considered desirable, they can have other characteristics that make them attractive. But women are expected[by society] to be beautiful...".
I interpreted that statement to mean that women are held to a higher standard than men and if they arent beautiful they are not valued. Now that Im grown up I realize that my intepretation was backwards, it is MEN that are held to a higher standard by society and women certainly do have pretty high expecations of men.But given how picky and judgemental most women are towards men, I have to ask: Why is it so unfair that women are judged by their looks? Especially when there are so many ways to alter how you look for a given sum of money.But what it boils down to is that Women arent as concerned with physical appearance as men are, but I Dont see how that implies that they(women)are held to a higher standard.

It's unfair that both are judged by their looks. I think it's stupid to pay a lot of money to look better if you look perfectly normal; that kind of sugery should be reserved for people who are disfigured, transgender, etc...
I don't think it's that women are held to a higher standard. I think it's that they're held to an unhealthy standard. The females are expected to be very underweight, whereas men are expected to be strong, which is healthier. That's why it's unfair to the women.

As someone who studies body image and the media's influence on your self esteem, I have to agree. I found out that as a woman with AS, we are sometimes especially vulnerable to pressures to be "pretty", and it can have disastrous results. For a while, my "special interest" was exercise and dieting in order to fit a certain body ideal. With my intense concentration and determination, it went overboard. Not to mention, I act in ways that are seen as "unfeminine", and when I was criticized for this by men, I felt terrible about it, and attempted to overcompensate for my "unfeminine" behaviour by applying too much emphasis on external beauty.
Now I've recovered from all that, and I hope other women, both on the spectrum and neurotypical, can escape the dangerous cycle perpetrated by so much emphasis on external appearances.