Interest in the planning, but not the doing

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Speaking just for me, as an Aspergian, this is not where my fear of failure demonstrates itself. I have that, oh my, yes! but not in this imanifestation. This is like I already had the fun, the feelings, the experience I wanted from it and that was enough for me. It is more like I did it my way, and got what I wanted out of it, like a hobby you don't do for any kudos or outside admiration, something just for me. I get what I want out of it. A lot of times, not everytime, but a lot of times, if I pursue the expedition to its physical manifiestation, I am disappointed by not 'feeling' in any physical sense.
So now I just have little hobbies where I plan fun things I never do and enjoy it. Then I go and do things I don't plan and have a ball. The really fun part is no one is second guessing why I am doing anything.

your mileage may vary,

Merle

I've always had the desire to be a rock star or sci-fi author, but never had the gumption to pursue it..

I love planning and theorizing and would LOVE to start putting such things into action, the problem is that the things I like to plan and theorize are "big ideas" that I am really not in a position of putting into action. It's kind of hard for a piss poor college student to force the world to follow my whims, no matter how much I'd like to put my ideas for, say, an environmentally friendly and oil-free infrastructure, or my ideas for a global federation, into practice. However, I'm always open to being appointed World Dictator.

I think I've been doing this all my life, in fact i was in a way waiting for someone to bring this up. I went crazy about the idea of learning guitar, took lessons for a month, and now 3 years after abandoning that poor instrument in some corner of my house, if I had to play, i would have to begin all over again. Learning french was another obsession, but i never got close to learning more than 10 words and dumping the paper in between the pages of some school book. And there are so many more including learning dance by attending only a single class, keeping a diary, etc. I just feel I've been making a noise about things but not really acting on them, and somewhere down the line I may treat the important activities of my life the same way, like my career. Sometimes i think i should just shutup and stop expressing desires of doing anything, and rather get my act right, do what i want to do and then speak!How i hate being so dormant about things!