Why are people so weirded out by "Quiet" people?

Page 2 of 3 [ 34 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3  Next

LightNights
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

User avatar

Joined: 10 May 2008
Age: 43
Gender: Female
Posts: 26

18 Feb 2009, 5:51 am

KevinLA wrote:


Emotions and friendliness pour out of neurotypical people.


:lol: no they don't, not friendliness anyway! :lol: :lol: the people i was at school with didn't pour friendliness..they didn't even trickle it!

this ia a really good question, and one i still ask myself. after all, it's good to have lots of different persona;ities around. i don't see anything wrong myself in being quiet so i can't understand other people's problem with it. :? :? :? :? :?

i suppose they need to learn to accept difference.



DeLoreanDude
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 10 Oct 2008
Age: 42
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,562
Location: FL

18 Feb 2009, 5:54 am

Eggman wrote:
Because they are pwnable n0obs


That's one way of putting it :lol:

It's because if you don't always need to be socialisng then you're different so that must mean that there's something wrong with you :roll:



tweety_fan
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Oct 2007
Age: 40
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,555

18 Feb 2009, 5:57 am

maybe they think quiet ones are up to something evil.

other then that i don't know.



MONKEY
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 3 Jan 2009
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 9,896
Location: Stoke, England (sometimes :P)

18 Feb 2009, 6:11 am

They think you are plotting something (I wish), or that you don't like them or they think you're anti social and hate everyone.
Apparently that's the sort or impression I give off. oh well


_________________
What film do atheists watch on Christmas?
Coincidence on 34th street.


KenM
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 15 Oct 2005
Age: 56
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,491
Location: Mass. USA

18 Feb 2009, 6:16 am

Because when they see you not going with everyone else being a sheep and following blindly, they get scarred and need to show it, so it makes you an easy target. If they attack another sheep, they will get cast out themselves.



Sora
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 15 Sep 2006
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,906
Location: Europe

18 Feb 2009, 10:36 am

I don't like it too much if people are quiet. If people do not interact, I can't tell what they're thinking. Also, they really really bore me and annoy me because they often act weird by avoiding interaction as if they're scarred or something.


_________________
Autism + ADHD
______
The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it. Terry Pratchett


i_wanna_blue
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 9 Aug 2008
Gender: Male
Posts: 11,113

18 Feb 2009, 10:45 am

CleverKitten wrote:
I don't understand it. I will just be sitting in a corner, reading my book, not bothering anyone at all, and then I hear girls whispering "She's weird", or "I don't like her", "She is creepy".
I can tell they are talking about me because out of my peripheral vision, I can see them pointing and looking at me.

I have never even talked to them before, so how do they come to all these conclusions?! 8O


What is so horrible about being quiet?


Tell me about it. In school I was the weird one just because I kept to myself. It's like people take offence if you don't show them that they are important (its not like they're showing me any importance). Man, being quiet in my world is like handing everyone an invitation to pick on you. :x



b9
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 14 Aug 2008
Age: 52
Gender: Male
Posts: 12,003
Location: australia

18 Feb 2009, 10:49 am

Quote:
Why are people so weirded out by "Quiet" people?


lots of people have faults in their personalities that they dread being discovered.

they like other people's silly comments to drown out and cover over their faults.

if they are left feeling embarrassed (because no one in their group is as stupid as them), they will look desperately around for someone who seems more off track than them.

if they find one, they point, and deflect the attention away from their own weakness.

that is the dirty floor of average personalities i think.

i am tired and severely impeded now in my communicativity, so i may make no sense. i will only know after i have slept and replenished my mind and read this again.

(although i rarely return to posts i have left "droppings" in.)



Acacia
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 Dec 2008
Age: 43
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,986

18 Feb 2009, 11:03 am

Quiet is deviant in a loud world.


_________________
Plantae/Magnoliophyta/Magnoliopsida/Fabales/Fabaceae/Mimosoideae/Acacia


MegaAndy
Toucan
Toucan

User avatar

Joined: 24 Jan 2009
Age: 32
Gender: Male
Posts: 255

18 Feb 2009, 3:23 pm

not the norm thats all



aspiescan
Butterfly
Butterfly

User avatar

Joined: 16 Feb 2009
Age: 41
Gender: Male
Posts: 15
Location: Santiago,Chile

18 Feb 2009, 11:27 pm

i think am very quiet too and to many people not like that atleast where i am , in work too they found rare that not smoke,drink,drugs or even get an girlfriend, not know why, just not feel the need of that things.



FlamingYouth
Pileated woodpecker
Pileated woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 30 Jan 2009
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 191

19 Feb 2009, 12:06 am

CleverKitten wrote:
I don't understand it. I will just be sitting in a corner, reading my book, not bothering anyone at all, and then I hear girls whispering "She's weird", or "I don't like her", "She is creepy".
I can tell they are talking about me because out of my peripheral vision, I can see them pointing and looking at me.

I have never even talked to them before, so how do they come to all these conclusions?! 8O


What is so horrible about being quiet?

I've been there several times. Boy, is it frustrating! I just think most people expect everybody to be social and talkative. And, a lot of high-school aged people or younger aren't mature enough to understand that there are differences in brain-wiring, and not everybody is equally social. Plus, these people have flaws of their own, and they figure that picking on somebody will make them feel better, and the quiet person is usually the easiest target, unfortunately. At least that's my best guess.



AnnePande
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 13 Jul 2007
Age: 47
Gender: Female
Posts: 994
Location: Aarhus, Denmark

19 Feb 2009, 9:19 am

I wonder a bit about something.

Why is it so important to NTs that people talk a lot, when they are supposed to be so good at nonverbal communication?? :lol:



AC132
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 23 Jan 2009
Age: 50
Gender: Female
Posts: 69
Location: UK

19 Feb 2009, 12:54 pm

I worked in a lovely office once, opposite a really nice NT girl who I'm still friends with. We would sometimes have that game where the first one to speak is a loser.

I wouldn't have a problem not speaking to people for a week, it's not an issue for me, but my friend was useless at this game. Two or three minutes of silence and she was getting fidgety, a few more and she was bursting to speak and then she would crack, it was as if she absolutley had to speak. She said she couldn't help it, the words were bubbling up inside and she couldn't keep them in anymore. Silence doesn't bother me, I don't feel compelled to fill gaps in conversation with chatter or humming or anything.

It seems to be an oppressive thing for them, which makes NTs feel uncomfortable. Maybe when they see someone actively seeking out and liking the thing they find so uncomfortable, they focus on the person, as if it is the loner doing the oppressing and the weirding, rather than it actually being their NT reaction to the silence. Or something.


_________________
You can't storm the barricades whilst eating a Kit-kat


flurry
Hummingbird
Hummingbird

User avatar

Joined: 27 Jan 2009
Age: 55
Gender: Female
Posts: 18

19 Feb 2009, 1:08 pm

Sora wrote:
I don't like it too much if people are quiet. If people do not interact, I can't tell what they're thinking. Also, they really really bore me and annoy me because they often act weird by avoiding interaction as if they're scarred or something.


i can't see why avoiding interaction would be considered weird especially if you are considering that they may 'be scarred or something'. it could also be, presumably, that some people's social development isn't quite as advanced as some others... huh?



Callista
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 3 Feb 2006
Age: 42
Gender: Female
Posts: 10,775
Location: Ohio, USA

19 Feb 2009, 1:25 pm

I think it's fear of the unknown.

When people can't predict you because you're quiet, they will be more afraid than not, because they don't know what you'll do or what you're capable of.

This is more likely to apply to males than females, since females are socially allowed to be shy, and a quiet female will be interpreted as "shy", which gives the observer a context in which to see her--unlike a quiet male, for whom there is no fixed definition.


_________________
Reports from a Resident Alien:
http://chaoticidealism.livejournal.com

Autism Memorial:
http://autism-memorial.livejournal.com