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LabPet
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29 Mar 2009, 2:12 pm

redplanet wrote:
My son who is severely autistic has the most beautiful eyes I've ever seen on a child. I know most mums would say that but nearly everybody comments on them - they are a perfect oval shape with long lashes, blue and sparkling. He always looks like he's part of some magic fairytale, wishing on a star or something like that.


I like your description (Lab Pet has green eyes) - and I noticed your post since I've had a few (mostly children, once a mentally ret*d man, etc) tell me I look to be from a Fairy Tale. One kid fairly recently asked me, "Are you Cinderella?" One asked me "Are you real?" So I do take stock in what you just posted. And your son must be very special. (redplanet: You might watch my video clip, in signature line, where my (lack of) eye contact is explained).

And, for later posters, like Hala, totally agree about that lack of eye contact thing: Precisely! Lab Pet doesn't do eye contact.
:ninja: < Just wear a blindfold. Tada: dilemma solved!


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Asterisp
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29 Mar 2009, 2:43 pm

I do not know if it are the eyes, would it not be the total picture and people only name the eyes?

But to look at my eyes, the look a bit flat. They do not sparkle like some peoples eyes. But that could have to do with their colour, they supposedly are brown, but not a nice dark taint but a light one almost blueish. Maybe my eyes fit my personality, since I am not the most sparkling and outspoken person around?



stros
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01 Apr 2009, 7:27 pm

Hala wrote:
djinnNtonic wrote:
Is a lot of this staring/not making eye contact just unconscious behavior that needs to be unlearned or is there more to it?

I believe that it is more than something that can be unconditioned. When I look people in the eye I feel as if my brain is receiving too much stimuli and that it "shuts down". I have to look away not only to briefly fade the extreme discomfort of eye contact, but also to stop my brain from freaking out long enough so that I can attempt to reply to the person's questions or statements. Eye contact can definitely be improved but in my experience this is very much a conscious change, I don't think the underlying discomfort or aversion to eye contact can ever be eradicated. This is just my experience though.


Unfortunatley people associate "autistic eyes" with being crazy. Therefore, people who are internally weak, feel intimidated, and they won't like b/c of that...my opinion



MeTaLiNmYvEiNs
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01 Apr 2009, 7:50 pm

When Im not focusing on anything and just staring off i've been told i have a vacant look on my face but when i'm aware on whats going on around me I have that "fairytale look" redplanet and labpet were talking about... especialy when im really focused on something, like a tv show Im into or something...



Ntstanch
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01 Apr 2009, 8:00 pm

Everyone I know says that I look really angry in the picture that I use for this forum. Which I cannot see, no matter how hard I try. Angry is probably an understatement... one girl said, " You look like you want to kill someone." and my ex-girlfriend would complain if I had it as my display picture on MSN. I also noticed that my dad also does this often. Although we both smile when someone is talking to us... but I know, for me at least, that I would probably come off as creepier if I attempted certain facial expressions, or tried to smile all the time.

Although the while looking intimidating has really been a problem for me, as I hate the idea of people always thinking I'm angry or upset or arrogant or whatever when I am very rarely any of those.

Does anyone else see it? :?



amazon_television
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01 Apr 2009, 8:05 pm

protest_the_hero wrote:
Quote:
I'm told I look high all the time might be my eyes.
Me too. It's a common aspie thing.


Is it? I never heard that but it's definitely the case for me. I also don't know what's up with this but I blink way more than normal, I remember when I was younger (maybe 17?) I was timed at 92 blinks a minute

People fixate on my eyes more than anything else. Almost every woman I've met refuses to believe that I don't shape my eyebrows (I don't have the focus to keep my eyebrows perfectly groomed! but whatever), and my eye color has been variously described as green, blue, gray, blue-gray, blue-green, hazel, and "different every day". (they are basically blueish-green on the outside and light brown around the pupil, but they do vary somewhat).

This picture shows the eyebrow thing and the "stoned" look (I actually look more ripped than normal in this though, I was real tired--but I was not stoned!)

Image



LabPet
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01 Apr 2009, 8:38 pm

Ntstanch wrote:
Everyone I know says that I look really angry in the picture that I use for this forum. Which I cannot see, no matter how hard I try. Angry is probably an understatement... one girl said, " You look like you want to kill someone." and my ex-girlfriend would complain if I had it as my display picture on MSN. I also noticed that my dad also does this often. Although we both smile when someone is talking to us... but I know, for me at least, that I would probably come off as creepier if I attempted certain facial expressions, or tried to smile all the time.

Although the while looking intimidating has really been a problem for me, as I hate the idea of people always thinking I'm angry or upset or arrogant or whatever when I am very rarely any of those.

Does anyone else see it? :?


Lab Pet cannot 'read' emotions or expression, and, agreed; to me you do not look angry (or homicidal!) - your eyes look like, well, Autistic Eyes.
amazon_television: Agreed; I do not drink/smoke/take any illicit drugs - ever! But I've been told I can look...far away? And drugged - but I am not.
MeTaLiNmYvEiNs (< that's a tricky username!): Understood about that 'fairytale look' & I've been told the same - often. I suspect this is mostly due to my gaze which can look dissociated &/or intense.

Eye contact is really not possible for me either (my video clip, URL below) includes this aspect too.


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richardbenson
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01 Apr 2009, 8:40 pm

my eyes look like my balls


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solinoure
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01 Apr 2009, 8:47 pm

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Duuude! I am soooo not high... So, just finish takin' teh pic - so I can munch out on these righteous nums!! ! (j/k)


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01 Apr 2009, 8:54 pm

Ntstanch wrote:
Everyone I know says that I look really angry in the picture that I use for this forum. Which I cannot see, no matter how hard I try. Angry is probably an understatement... one girl said, " You look like you want to kill someone." and my ex-girlfriend would complain if I had it as my display picture on MSN. I also noticed that my dad also does this often. Although we both smile when someone is talking to us... but I know, for me at least, that I would probably come off as creepier if I attempted certain facial expressions, or tried to smile all the time.

Although the while looking intimidating has really been a problem for me, as I hate the idea of people always thinking I'm angry or upset or arrogant or whatever when I am very rarely any of those.

Does anyone else see it? :?


That doens't look like anger to me, it looks like determination. People often fear people who are deeply determined, and that could be why they think it looks angry, because of a subconscious association of their fear of determination with anger in the people who exhibit it.



amazon_television
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01 Apr 2009, 9:03 pm

solinoure I know you're joking but that's actually a good point, the fact that I was able to refrain from devouring that plate long enough for the picture to be taken is as good as scientific proof that I was not stoned hahaha, I get out of control munchies when I'm high (and now that I don't smoke really I get em real bad just from being in the room with people smoking)

Also I just realized that picture is gigantic, sorry about that. I have a smaller version but it just does not do the extreme stoned face justice.



CelticRose
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01 Apr 2009, 9:54 pm

Ntstanch wrote:
Everyone I know says that I look really angry in the picture that I use for this forum. Which I cannot see, no matter how hard I try. Angry is probably an understatement... one girl said, " You look like you want to kill someone." and my ex-girlfriend would complain if I had it as my display picture on MSN. I also noticed that my dad also does this often. Although we both smile when someone is talking to us... but I know, for me at least, that I would probably come off as creepier if I attempted certain facial expressions, or tried to smile all the time.

Although the while looking intimidating has really been a problem for me, as I hate the idea of people always thinking I'm angry or upset or arrogant or whatever when I am very rarely any of those.

Does anyone else see it? :?

I don't think you look angry, etc., but I can see what the NTs are seeing.

You have no expression at all on your face, which really freaks NTs out. They are so accustomed to using facial expression to "read" people, that if you have no expression at all they feel the need to invent one to fill the void. Since they are feeling angry, scared, etc., due to your lack of facial expression, they project those feelings onto you.


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Ntstanch
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01 Apr 2009, 10:10 pm

I'm gunna try and responde to my replies later... I spent too much time trying to type a rant about noise blowing my attention apart and how my roommate is the worst case of ADHD impulsiveness ever... and now my brain is all much, and my vision all nice and spastic like in the movie " the butterfly affect " when they go back in time... except a lot milder, thankfully.