To homeschool or not to homeschool, that is the question

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Would you rather have been homeschooled or do you think going to school is important? I am a certified teacher and could easily homeschool my 6 year old son, but I wonder is that what is best for him. What is your opinion?

Definitely homeschool him. Many people say that homeschooled children don't get exposed to 'people' enough.

But you could easily do that by taking him out in public and teaching lessons about people, and having people in the home, as well.

I think things might have been easier for me, and I would have fared better academically if I were home schooled. However, I don't know if I would be as good as I am at acting neurotypical.

There are pros and cons to either situation. With the exception of one year, we have had one or more children at home for the past 7 years, and all three have been home for the past two years. If you have just one child, I think homeschooling is a lot simpler. Social outings are easy to find or arrange and you can focus on a single curriculum targeted to the particular learning style of your child. (If anything, I have found myself limiting social outings so that we can get some butt-in-the-chair school work done. It would be pretty easy to play all day every day -- there are that many social opportunities.) Anyway, families choose what works best for their families, and what works best can vary from year to year.

Two things:
(1) Make an informed decision. Is the curriculum and structure of the classroom your child will attend appropriate for your child? If so, give it a shot. If not, maybe stay home. One size doesn't fit all in clothing or education. Also, know the laws in your state and county. The county's public school website should have this information.
(2) You can change your mind at any time. If your child is in school you can pull him out AT ANY TIME, and if your child is schooling at home you can enroll him AT ANY TIME.

I have noticed something this year, now that the two oldest are set to try a year back in a classroom --- the schools are not so eager to have more students now that money is tight. After years of discouraging policies toward homeschooling, my oldest actually brought back from the counselor's office a listing of approved correspondence courses for high school credit. Ha!

School, there are many different lessons to be learned when it comes to social situations. I went to school and it was at some times not that easy but I did get that edge and heads up for what was coming later in life. It hardened my senses and I'm very happy my mother didn't hide me away from it. If it becomes to much and you notice depression then pull out but if it's a positive experience then your child will grow. I never liked to speak as a kid but by pushing my self a bit and getting put in certain situations I learned the hardcore basics of arguments and different signals that are quite important in life. I never use them except when buying stuff from the store and so on, little things that acquire interaction skill but it all thought me enough to move abroad and continue my studies giving me a sense of freedom and a very golden "can do!" attitude, which I find very useful since it is very positive. I'm happy I went to school, I learned tremendously much not only from books and lessons but from life and the function of people and their environment.

School teaches you things you just can't learn at home under the protective wing of ones mother. Thanks to school I have no social anxiety anymore nor any problem to interact with people, I hardly do, but I can... very well. People would never believe I have AS. And when I tell someone who knows about AS they go "No, you can't have AS, they can't speak like that!". Well practice makes perfect and I'm glad I did my "homework".

Well that's it, I have no more to give. It's important to give the child a sense of freedom as well since we will mostly be locked away in our minds most of the time.

For me I preferred homeschool. I only had a few years of it but I understood my work more from my mum teaching me or me teaching myself, rather than learning from teachers in school.
My social skills did not get better by going to school and I was falling behind in class due to undiagnosed AS. At homeschool I aced all my subjects.

There were a lot of parts about school that sucked, and a lot of parts that were nice...one thing's for sure, if it wasn't for school, I would have absolutely no friends at all.

I don't talk to anyone from school. Or even TAFE for that matter. Friends just drift away from me.

There is a problem: Such people are more-or-less well chosen. I a school you have a random selection of people. Going to school will teach you how to handle those. This is perhaps an approach like pushing someone into deep water and say: "Learn to swim!", but is IHMO in the most cases a better preparation for real live.

Seeing that the public schools have become about indoctrination into the popular "group think" and that I've not seen maybe 10 graduates with the ability to think critically for themselves, I'd not send a kid to the public school system.

My best learning environment was at a Christian School where I was around other children but we worked out of textbooks called "lifepacs," which my sister's high school used "paces," where you read, learn, study, and quiz on your own pace. But that was grade school, and when I hit Junior high, I went to public schools and that was a really tough change for me.

Now I'm the strangest mother you will ever meet, so my plans are really out there for my children. In my house, we jump on beds, draw on walls, and eat desert before dinner. Either way....

What I'm probably going to do with my children is the public school system supplementing education at home. When I say at home, I mean fun learning as opposed to classroom learning as well as what I call "survival" training. I decided a long time ago that most children benefit all around from travel. The money I would spend on private school tuition would be better used to show my children this world. I just noticed that kids who have seen other cultures tend to be less self absorbed at the high school age. Like they know there is a bigger world besides themselves and the prom. Also, I think it's easier to teach history when you are touring a historical landmark. Of course you can always incorporate learning into just about anything.

Also, I think it's my job as a parent to teach my children basic survival. That doesn't just mean to teach them first aid, how to handle a weapon, martial arts, etc. That's more self defense almost. It's also to teach them to manage money, manage household tasks, cook, clean, handle vehicle upkeep, and if either of my daughters are Aspie, also social behaviors. A lot of these things you can sign your kids up later for things that will teach some of it, like Boys in the Boy Scouts learn a lot of basic survival in the wild. But, I figure most of it is for when they are older, so I have a lot of time before I need to really plan out details. But first things first, a lot of those "survival" skills are ones I really need to learn before I can attempt to teach them. Children learn best by example, so right now I'm working on better money management and household management, and personal management all together I guess.

I should also add that I already feel sorry for whatever teachers my children will have. I will keep my kids' school on a very tight leash. If they get a bad grade because they were too creative, or they get suspended because they were defending themselves or someone they loved with the use of minimal force, then I will be there to stop that even if I have to sleep with the superintendant to do it. I won't have much tolerance for bull shnit. I have heard the teachers in the bathroom labeling students (having no idea that a student was in the stall using the bathroom). I also know too many teachers that marry a student right after the student turns 18. Yeah, like they didn't date when the student was underage and a student. I know they take the easy way out when it comes to discipline, and I know they can't do much with discipline besides detention and suspension. I also know they can't control what all the kids do, including mine, but also kids with parents who are too busy looking for their next high or too busy trying to get that promotion to be concerned with their children's behavior at school.
Basically, I know a lot about what goes on at school because unlike most grown ups, I remember more of it. And I don't intend to just accept all of it. A lot of it is just the schools in the states. Puerto Rico is very different, and my in-laws live there, so worse case scenario, my kids will end up in Puerto Rico where God is still allowed in the Public Schools.

But as far as my school is considered, I'm glad I was in the schools I went to. Anytime you have a flaw, i.e. lousy social skills, you can either avoid dealing with it, or you can face it and learn how to overcome it. While an Aspergers child might be much more comfortable in a home schooled environment, the public school system where the children are harsh might be a better learning experience. Of course, the role of the parent plays a major role through it all. To be honest, your kid should be able to do or handle anything as long as you are willing to play the roles of psychologist, drill sgt, Loving parent, and pretty much, all the roles people give God. Some parents (I won't mention my sister) aren't willing to be all those things. I really feel bad for kids in that environment because they actually do feel alone in this world. That would be the same no matter where they are.

But I guess I should best put it as if you can't be happy now, then nothing will bring you happiness. It doesn't matter if you are home schooled, public school, private school.... Things are how you make them.

To be honets, I'm not so sure. On one hand, with homeschooling, I wouldn't have had to put up with all the foolishness that goes on in school, which would have been so nice. However, my mother would have been doing the schooling and honestly, I don't know if that would be a good thing or not.

My mother often engaged in strange behavior involving the kids. For one thing, we spent most of our lives on lockdown, i.e. not being allowed to go outside and if we did, we weren't allowed to have contact with anyone in the neighborhood, or we were only allowed in areas with no people.

She would also let my brother and sister stay in their rooms for hours reading, yet if I wanted to go out and play in the back yard or do something else, wouldn't mandate either of them drop what they were doing and join me, yet if they wanted to go out and I wanted to stay in, I was forced to go with them. I didn't quite understand this double standard.

I remember one time she got mad at my teacher and the school I was attending, so she said she was going to keep me home and have me repeat the grade next year at another school. For around 2 weeks, I stayed home and pretty much did nothing other than play, occasionally go out with her to run errands, and watch TV. On the last day of it she proclaimed to me there'd me no TV that day, saying that until we get our school work done, the TV is unplugged. I basically went to my room and played by myself while my sister, who didn't want to go to school that day stayed home and read. My mother once came into my room and saw me playing with a deck of cards and asked me what I was doing and when I told her I was playing cards, she said I was supposed to be doing school work. I was totally confused by this, since I hadn't been in school in 2 weeks. The next day we went back to the same school.

At this time of year, I would sometimes think it was cool outside and wanted to wear long pants, but my mother would have a fit and send me back to my room to put on shorts. It turned into a major battle with her and she'd sometimes go ballistic if I came downstairs in long pants during the summertime. It sort of became a way for me to rebel without doing any damage.

My mother's obsession with forcing me to swim is something I also talked about in this forum and still makes no sense to me. Forcing me to go other places, while allowing the other members of the family to have a choice, is yet another piece of her behavior that made no sense. Double standards never made sense to me.

Academically homeschooling might have been better for me, but I don't know who would do more damage, the monsters I had to attend school with, or my parents.

Simply put, if homeschooling or virtual schooling had been an option when I was in school I would not have dropped out.

Elementary for the most part was okay, my differences didn't become more obvious until I was around 12.

I would say go with the flow...if he is thriving in a public school enviroment than there is no reason to pull him out. But if he's struggling to get by, and losing his self-esteem trying to "fit-in"...personally I wouldn't hesitate to homeschool.

I think I would have done a lot better if I was home schooled. Even now I still don't know how to interact right or make friends-not because I haven't been around people but because nobody will tell me how!

A simple question: What about the academic quality? I mean two foreign languages, higher mathematics and other thinks like are the basis of any reasonable education. I am strong doubt that the most parents are capable of teaching such subjects.

If I wasn't put through the horrors of primary (at least I felt nt and talked back then) and secondary schools I would be completely disfunctionate. I'd say public school, unless your kid is has very strong autistic symptoms