Tired of being a pushover?

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I let people push me around for the first 5 or 6 years of my life then i was threw with it and i stopped and started fighting back, now im lucky with braud shoulders, a huge upper anfd lower body, im really a scary person especially with all of my scars, but i can only do so much to stop being stepped on, how do we fight this, being assertive is good, but some of us are just not assertive people nor, should they have to be like that to have a happy life, what can we do to stop this?

Oh yes. You would not believe what people do, either in ignorance or deliberately. You have to actively make it uncomfortable for them to step on you, and do things that you would be reluctant to do because they feel rude or unfriendly. No fun

It's not the fact that you are standing up for yourselves (and if it is the reason, then f**k those types of people anyway), it's that fact HOW you do it. There's a difference between being asked something and you just going "Haha no way man, I really have no time, sorry dude" or you starting to get all pissy and defensive. The former will just invoke a "Oh well, it was worth a try" thought while the latter will be more "Ho ho man chill out, not need to get all flustered, Jesus Christ don't be so sensitive"

Screw you man, I'm putting you on shun, and if I were to meet you in real life, I'd look at my shoes and think long and hard about how I'd thrash you.

The hell are you talking about?

Shut up man! You are being shunned.

Do ho ho oh no, please, stop with the shunning!

..

Last edited by alba on 01 Jul 2009, 6:13 pm, edited 1 time in total.

The only two choices in life are submissively creepy or offensively rigid. No thanks Bob, but I'll look for a more socially acceptable compromise. There are no booleans in the real world, life is filled with fuzzy logic



A monologue is not a conversation. Being a self-centered jerk isn't an AS trait, it's a symptom of how little respect you have for the opinions and feelings of the people around you. Hogging a conversation isn't uniquely AS, all that's required is not giving a crap about anyone but yourself.



Good lord.
A lot of words that basically describe your role as "not the most important person on the planet".

AS is a diagnosis, it's not your membership into the ultimate "us vs them" battle for neurological validity. A diagnosis is a tool to help you recognize obstacles to live a more fulfilling life, it's not an badge or a scarlet letter.

You really need to tone it down a bit or you'll get yourself sent to the quiet room.

Can't wait to hear what you've come up with. Will you share with us or keep it a secret?

You should know. You've shown how little you respect the feelings of others.
Does this work for you IRL?
You made me feel terrible about my post; it has been deleted.
Did you even look at the thread title?

Have you seen the PPR Forum? They would no doubt love to hear all about your life philosophy...but I'm not really interested.

Haha no, let him meltdown, it's quite funny really
also, you shouldn't delete your post just cause some bozo didn't like it. stand by what you wrote

Negotiation and compromise come to mind. Being a doormat means everyone but you gets what they want, and "my way or the highway" means no one but you gets what they want. Compromise means everybody gets something, and negotiation means someone sacrifices something for something they want more.



A good part of your post was ranting about how NTs got bored when you monopolized the conversation. It's not something uniquely AS. If I wanted to hear monologues, I could as easily walk into a bar of intoxicated middle-aged NTs desperate to talk about their drunken philosophies or what they saw on Fox News. I'm pretty sure NTs get bored with other NTs who like to monologue.



Realtalk is right, you shouldn't have deleted your original post. I'm no expert on you, and my opinion applies to my own personal experiences. If what you're doing works for you, stand by it.



I just got linked to the TOS. Context is a funny thing.

I feel other persons whom have know understanding if, not such individuals are nothing more than tyrants are the one's most likely to bully you..Yes, I can recall as a kid, how often I'd be chased by a bunch of goons and taunted and have those same people simply try to make my life a so-called Hades.Anyways, during those times, I'd wish that my brother had been around to deal with those pests but, that was not the case still, I'd wanted someone to help me out of sorts..These days, I don't get tormented in the same manner but, I'm aware of how often people whom I come across in a general manner often treat me as, if I was mentally ret*d.. Well, let the Witch-Hunters have their so-called fun cause, eventually people like that wind up getting what they deserve as, I don't mean this in some malevolent manner..

Check out TOS for this forum; we'll not have personal attacks and name calling. Inappropriate. If you have ideas to express, then do so. But not by using threatening words to others.

For this reason this thread is locked.