Presents and surprises

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The part I hate about Christmas is recieving presents. I hate having to give a reaction when opening a present and I always feel that my reaction is fake (even if I love the present). I just can't naturally give an excited or grateful reaction and it takes a lot of effort for me to pretend to. This causes a lot of anxiety. We did a 'secret santa' at work but I was the only person not to join in because not only would I have to give a reaction in front of a room of people, but I wouldn't know who it was that had actually given me the present. I also hate surprises so much, if someone threw a suprise party for me I think I'd burst into tears and run off.

Does anyone else feel like this? Any tips for how to give realistic reactions?

I've seen a video of me at Christmas when I was about 7 and I rip open all the presents as fast as I can (even though my parents are telling me off for going too fast) and in a really fake voice I say "my favourite" before moving to the next one (once this was even followed by "what is it?" which made me laugh). I don't have children myself so is this just normal child behaviour?

Thanks.

I'm absolutely terrible at this. Sometimes my Mum gets me these really awful clothes, and I can barely disguise my contempt when I first open the parcel, although I eventually manage to say "thanks" through gritted teeth!

I have this too! I HATE people surprising me with things; which is why I tell my friends, don't buy me presents or whatever, I don't want them. If I was ever in a room... I'd run off too.

Luckily, this year for christmas, I have told my mother WHAT I want, exactly, so I am expecting everything. As for reactions... mine are fake, but I usually do something along the lines of;

'THANK YOU SO MUCH!! !!'

And then slyly put it aside. ;P

Same here. I can never seem to get a good reaction. I just don't get it. I feel bad about it, guilty even, but what can you do?

I always say thank you. No one has ever gotten on my back about it so I must have done done something right.

I also tend to avoid work gift-giving ("White Elephant" exchanges are worst of all!). This year, there was no gift exchange at work, so that was nice. I attended the small party for my office, but skipped the division "all hands" Xmas party. It was so nice and quiet in the office by myself.

With family present exchanges, I guess I've just learned to say that I like everything. I assume it sometimes sounds fake, but it's still better than no reaction or a bad reaction.

I'm glad you mentioned surprise parties. For my 16th birthday (I'm 44 now), my mom threw me a surprise party. I clearly remember how dismayed I was, and how the one thing I really wanted to do was turn around and leave. This never really made sense to me until I found WP and recognized my AS traits. Now it *totally* makes sense (like so many other things).

These days, I make sure everyone knows I hate surprises.

JSB

I like getting presents actually, I find it very exciting when I go into the living room on xmas morning to find all presents on the sofa
But like alot of you I am crap at hiding my contempt for bad presents

I'm the same way. I just don't know how to react. If though I like the gift, I just can't show the proper amount of enthusiasm, and I'm afraid the person giving the gift will get offended. It feels fake when I try to react anyway. I do like getting gifts though.

I think I'm alright at hiding it if I don't like something though. I try not to offend people, even if they give me things that anyone who knew me at all would know that I won't use (such as earrings since my ears have never been pierced or candles since I'm afraid of lighting them indoors). Most people are also terrible at picking out clothes. If anyone hints that they are thinking about getting me clothes, I mention that I already have plenty of clothes. They usually get the wrong size or things that I would feel completely ridiculous wearing.

Ugh... my stomach is in knots (not literally) because I am so worried about Christmas. I HATE IT!! ! Call me Scrooge all you want but I find it so stressful, especially the whole everyone ringing you up to 'wish you a happy christmas'. What's there to be happy about? A complete change in routine, a bunch of stuff, some of which you didn't ask for, enforced socialisation, indigestion (I don't eat too much though) then relatives falling asleep on your newly straightened sofa, ruining your perfectly arranged cusion alignment...

As for reacting to a present, my family have learnt to accept a squeal and flapping hands as my 'thanks!'.

Yeah, same here.

An ex-friend of mine one year got me a hoodie.

Yeah, a hoodie....cause y'know...I was so dying to look like Eminem.


Ironically, I did wind up using it a couple years ago. I might use it again for a particular business purpose....

Awww, I love hoodies. They've gotten a lot of negative social connotations, but if you wear ones with kitty ears on, you tend to avoid that!

I don't really mind gifts, although I imagine as surprise party would totally mess up my schedule and be very irresponsible.

The problem with gifts is that they tend to not be what I want. They're not bad, it's just I could've done it better. Recent trends seem to be that giving money is okay, which is great because you'll always get what you want.

I always worry that I'll sound unappreciative. If I get something that I love I still normally wouldn't react except maybe a "nice, thank you", but I try to force enthusiasm just to please.