Lived Self-Diagnosed, then Confirmed not to have AS

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Hi BrooxBroox and another welcome. This is a really interesting thread. What if what happened is that, because you read about autism and understood what was going on in your head, and having a lot of intellectual ability you were able to deal with the autism so well that you can pass for normal?

I resisted for years any suggestion that I might be AS, but when someone finally put a book in front of me and said "read this", I wished it was around when I was fourteen. Nowadays I've no idea if other people would think I was AS or not but I wouldn't want to prove it to anyone - way too humiliating. If anyone who actually spent any time with me said I seemed normal to them it'd be a huge confidence boost, and I think that's the way you should take your undiagnosis. WELL DONE YOU. Good luck with your studies.

OP, you story sounds exactly like why I will not go in for a diagnosis. I am comfortable with the fact that I am somewhere mildly on the spectrum and yet I know that I am not "impaired" enough to get a diagnosis. That's what defines whether you have a disorder or not to the medical community. How "impaired" you are at functioning "normally."

I think its possible I may have been able to be diagnosed if I had gotten assessed as a child. When I was much more detached from reality - in my own world - unable to make eyecontact, had inappropriate emotional response (crying for strange reasons that I still can't properly describe to this day, absense of fear, absense of grief, tendency to analyze the situation rather than worry about it, absence of familial attachment), selective mutism, highly attached to inanimate objects, inability to process non-specific instructions/needing unusually high amounts of systemizing and structure, general disinterest of connecting with people...

Anyway my point is I was much more "impaired" as a child but when it got to the point where I had to get out there and take care of myself, I learned to cope. I force myself to look in people's eyes (well, to all appearances I do anyway. I actually look at an invisible glass wall a few inches in front of their face), I force myself to hold conversations (by removing my mental filter and saying whatever comes to mind which gets me into additional trouble.. but if I stopped to filter, I'd never say a thing). I force myself to take an action in a situation where the steps are unclear (after panicking about it for a good while). Etc.. I think I appear rather normal. I have gotten incredulous reactions when I mention autism from all but my mother and husband (aka the people who know me intimately as opposed to superficially).

Maybe I don't have it, maybe I'm "cured," who knows? To that I say, "Who cares?" Certainly not I. I've expressed several times on this forum that it is enough for me to identify with this community and learn and share experiences. I don't need a label.

I don't feel particularly impaired by having AS. I'm socially awkward and I have sensory issues, yes. I also have chronic insomnia that leads to all kinds of disabling problems. and I miss most of the supposed non-verbal communication that goes on. still, if the spectrum brain is physically different than the NT brain and manifests itself across a spectrum of different qualities/behaviors, then diagnosing according to disabling qualities alone will always exclude those who've learned to function through analysis and practice rather than by whatever it is that makes most people good at non-verbal communication.

I've been to many, many professionals for depression. no one looks past that if you're an adult female. they just give you drugs. I made appropriate eye contact, so I could not have AS. that's what I was told when I brought it up. well, I don't have clinical depression and I do have AS, so professionals aren't infallible.

so with aspergers they couldn't sell you any meds and without they have you on lexapro? shrinks drive me nuts.

There's also the whole thing with depression and anxiety being a comorbid of AS, it's possible perhaps you have GAD and AS?? As it's already been suggested in this thread, a lot of psychs seem to go waaaay overboard with just handing out pills to cure X, Y and Z without bothering to go deeper into the root causes in the first place!!

Anyway, all I was going to suggest really was this; have you ever applied the DSM criteria to you past as well as your present? Does the AS 'profile' fit you as you are now, and also as you were when younger? Can you cite some examples of something, like say a sensory overload that you experienced when you were a kid, basically, if possible it might help if you wrote out something like this (or even better, if you can talk with relatives as they may be able to help remember your childhood and how you behaved, and indeed any odd behaviour that stands out in their memories)

And another thing, were you diagnosed by both psychs after just one visit or did you have to see each professional on more than 1 occasion? I'm asking because if the assessment was made after just one visit, this seems a bit abrupt, when I had my assessment I had to go back to the psychologist for 3 visits before she gave me the official diagnosis of mild Aspergers, in other words she wanted to get to know me a little better before going through my past, the DSM and then making the diagnosis.

fwiw I'm also female and she said she found it quite difficult to diagnose me at first, but by the 3rd visit she was quite certain. Thing is, I've read a lot of books on Aspergers since, and that one does come up time and again that us females are better at hiding it. To be honest, I'm darned good at faking 'normal' for a while when outside, but when I come home and I'm safe again I run about the house on my tip toes and get all excited every time I see 'plat-plats' (herring gulls) outside, so yeah, I suppose in some ways going 'to see the doctor' makes me take the 'formal me' out of the box, and formal me tends to act as 'normal' as possible.
It's like the personality version of wearing a suite!!

Wow, you're seriously complaining about NOT having Asperger's? I have it (as in, I WAS DIAGNOSED BY A MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL) and I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.

Self-diagnosis is BS. Most of the symptoms of Asperger's/autism can be applied to other conditions or can simply apply to "I have no social skills." And to the self-diagnosed people: You are the reason why so many people think Asperger's syndrome is made up. Just because you're socially awkward does NOT mean you have Asperger's. You are almost as obnoxious as the people who claim their kids have ADD because they can't pay attention.

By the way, Asperger's is just high-functioning autism. Try being a special snowflake now.

I took that quiz twice this week and both times it said it most likely have AS. I have not been formally diagnosed yet as i just found about AS this week and don't have health insurance but i am going to try to get an official eval i think.

*edit* i misread the title of the thread. i have not seen a doctor so i have not been confirmed to have it or not have it, oops.

You can probably visit 5 different doctors and recieve 5 different diagnosis regarding this. It is still very much debatable what is what even at the top of the field, let alone some random diagnostician. So while not getting the "wanted" diagnosis is probably a bit of a shock i wouldn`t worry too much about it until they sort the definitions and criteria in the first place and maybe try again later if you wish.