social battery

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Does any else sometimes go through periods of being able to put across a face people accept,make friends and do well....for a while before everything gets too difficult,you can't put on your mask, feel tired all the time like a drained battery and you haveto cut off contact with the friends?I recently started college but things I was surprised I was able to cope with the last five months have suddenly became as difficult as before.there seems to be a cycle in my life of this type of thing.
Has anyone else had experience of this?

Oh yeah, for sure. A good example for me, is going to Christmas dinner with the family and in-laws. I act just fine while I'm there, and everbody else thinks so too, but when i get home I crash hard, usually napping for a couple hours while i recharge from the 'drain'.

Anxiety is a terrible thing to deal with, especially when it's at 'disorder levels'.

know that feeling well and really true...
People are now wondering why i can't keep that level of sociality etc up and on top of the problem to begin with that is starting to agitate me too.

yeh i think so, especialy more so if it is not my good friends i have had for years. I do find hanging out with my good friends although it can be taxing is also in another way very rewarding. i need to think a bit more about it to explain it better.

The social battery thing is quite common. I don't know if I have or would experience this or not. I've only recently been paying a lot of attention to myself.

I don't tend to make an effort to be somebody I'm not. I don't force myself to socialize. If there are more than 2 to 3 people, even if I've known them for over half my life, I tend to not be involved with the socializing and wish to not be there at all (this perhaps could be tiring for long periods). It seems that most people with an ASD get tired out from trying to appear normal.

I know that just making phone calls that I'm not comfortable with can make me feel sick afterwards. The anxiety and general ill feeling fades over a short time, but I can't imagine having to deal with social in any form that I'm not comfortable with -all- the time. I may end up with the "social battery" thing.

Sure I can get tired if I try to do too much social stuff for too long. I seem to avoid crashing by limiting the social part of my life, and particularly by NOT trying too hard to fit in or to appear a lot more "normal" than I am. I'll go so far but ultimately I am what I am.

But there's more to it than just needing alone time to recharge.......if I stay away from people for too long, my social skills get rusty and I get to like being alone a little too much for my own good, so I start noticing the awkward aspects of company. To perform at my best socially I need a good balance of company and solitude, and I like to think that I could increase the social time gradually as I get more used to it, though social opportunities and obligations tend to happen when they want to rather than when they fit nicely into my training programme.

Absolutely. It's difficult to monitor ebbs and flows, or how much activity is too much and how much 'time out' is going to be needed to recoup. But just knowing that this is how you function can be useful. Before I knew I had AS, I always wondered why I was so often tired/stressed and in need of solitary breaks to cope. I never thought of it as something linked to social situations, but It is.

I also think, along with the social aspect being draining, sensory issues can often play a part in exhaustion. When I'm at home, I'm in better control over how much sensory stimulation I'm subject to. In other situations (especially social ones) there are more sights and sounds to process and contend with.

btw, asobi_seksu, I like your username. I'm guessing you like the band of the same name.

I think this is due to a strain from excess information processing. NTs have that information automatically running in the background; they don't have to think about it. We can compensate for a considerable amount of that social processor that we don't have, but it takes extra effort. Other areas of the brain have to take over, and it is draining after a while. I think a graphics processor in a computer would be fairly analogous.

I've noticed this phenomenon with my 14 yo son, and it definitely impacts his ability to complete school work during the second half of the day. However, I never heard the phrase "social battery" before and I like it! I think the concept of a "social battery" is a most excellent analogy/description for what my son goes through on a daily basis, and I plan to use this term while advocating for him in school. So, many thanks for giving us some very useful language! Hang in there. I can't help but believe that with hard work, determination, and persistence you will find a way to overcome

I have just been working on a relapse prevention plan (to try to avoid another bout of severe depression) with my psychologist and there is the same idea of needing a time-out to recharge a social battery. The warning list we came up with is:

INCREASED
Anxiety
Rumination
Avoidance
"What ifs" = something bad
Demands
Numbing of emotions

DECREASED
Social contact
Interest in doing things
Communication

The idea is that being aware of these alarm bells and taking time out, and trying to ensure graded social interaction, allows time to recharge.

Yeah I get that a bit but I'm more anti-social than not.

Yes, I know what you mean. On Sundays I go to my church and it takes me mondays and tuesdays to re-charge and feel ready to meet people again.

to tell you the truth when I think back on myself in college it kind of makes my heart ache. Bleh.

Anymore I just accept what I am. I can definitely feel it when I get over-stimulated.

When I have to interact too much with people I get overstimulated and can't take light or noise or anything. There have been some times in my life where I was able to turn on a social, getting to know people person, and I enjoyed it, but I couldn't do it for very long - like maybe an hour and I'd get overwhelmed the same day. And if I made friends, the friendships would fade very quickly because I didn't want to pursue any further communication. I have always enjoyed one on one type of attention, though but it was usually a guy who just had motives of more than just hanging out. And I've always had trouble in party type situations - crying and stuff - I can't pull out that persona at parties.

I do find that I need to charge my social battery, from time to time. I'll have three weeks to do that, starting next week.