How do you determine if you can read social cues?

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I've been looking at information on AS for a few weeks, since our bio teacher briefly discussed ASDs. A few things she mentioned sounded familiar so I started reading about it online. I have several traits: social problems, sensory problems, attention problems, obsessive interests...
What I'm not sure about is how well I read "social cues" and empathize. I've taken quizes online but those just seem to tell you how well you think you do. So I was wondering if anyone here had any suggestions. How might I determine if my problems are with reading social cues and empathy?

A psychiatrist could help. Or . . . try watching a movie considered to have brilliant acting . . . if you don't get why, that could be an indication.

Your avatar looks like a guy hatching from an egg, and you are an "emu egg." It made me smile and feel quite joyous.

Thanks for the advice. I just picked that picture at random when I made the profile I have no idea where "emu-egg" came from.

It's a system based on how many posts you have. If you stick around, you'll graduate to Butterfly.

I found out by being told and being told what people know on their own I didn't know. I had to be told it to know. Plus just by reading and I learn from experience. Like I know it's not okay to date your friend's ex. I saw a thread about it here once and I saw it in Mozart and the Whale and I just picked up it must not be okay to do it. But what if your friend was okay with it? I think it should be okay.

Non-Verbal Dictionary

Check it out. I was shocked by just how much non-verbal communication there is between NTs.

NTs I showed this to, were only shocked that I didn't know this stuff.

[quote="ghostpawn"][url=http://www.center-for-nonverbal-studies.org/6101.html]Non-Verbal Dictionary[/url]

Check it out. I was shocked by just how much non-verbal communication there is between NTs.

NTs I showed this to, were only shocked that I didn't know this stuff. [/quote]

Thanks for sharing that. That's all new to me

I didn't know such dictionary existed. Cool. Why would there be one if NTs already know that stuff? Maybe they like to cater the small minority such as us.

Is there a website for the nonverbal dictionary?

my psychiartrist said i have difficulties with social cues...but i still am not sure what it means. i am not saying he's got it wrong, just that i am not aware myself of what social cues i am missing.

Wow, fascinating!! !

Isopraxism ("Tendancy to mimic others") could be redefined as "The thing Aspies don't have". They say about it: Our tendency to imitate clothing styles and to pick up the nonverbal mannerisms of others is rooted in paleocircuits of the reptilian brain.

Can we assume that someone who does not automatically imitate others is operating from a higher brain circuit?

Possibly. Most of the time, when some part of a human brain doesn't fulfill its function properly, we'll adapt some other part to cover the same thing. It could be that we're doing a lot of this stuff "manually", using brain structures not specialized for the job, whereas with other people it's more automatic because it's located in an older, more instinctive section of the brain.

You can often tell that you don't get non-verbals when people tend to get upset and expect you to know things you had no way of knowing.

Non-verbal cues can be studied........and learnt academically.

I have studied body language over the years from books and websites. If you google "body language" there should be plenty on the subject. Strangely people seem fascinated by learning their own cues! It is very interesting though.

When I have some mental stamina, it seems that I can cognitively recognise body language and non-verbal cues with lightening precision. I am better at it than most people without AS. I have studied for years but on the days where I am tired, stressed or the person makes me feel plain creepy(which happens a lot ) my cognitive process goes out the window and I make all sorts of mistakes.

On a note of interest, I find with my fiance for eg., whom I know very well and am quite familiar with his body language, if he has a few drinks and gets a bit tipsy, his body language shifts slightly and throws me off completely. To the point where I am terrified. It is like alarm bells ringing all over the place and internal shouts of "computer says no!!". It can be very disarming. I think it is a trust thing. I do not recognise him if he changes his "language" and I go instinctively on the alert for danger. Intellectually I know it is the same person, but it becomes very confusing and often find myself reverting to primal cues like smell and touch. If he smells and feels like my man, he is my man but a strange version of it. I then have to make a decision as to whether to kick him out of the cave or let him stay and see what he can offer in terms of tools, furs or food

So, non-verbal cues and body language is just that, a language. Most languages can be learnt, and in my opinion this is no exception. It is not easy, it can seem completely foreign and banal and takes many years to learn. I still practice my skills when socialising(which is very rare)......I bet you will find it a challenge, but it is a science of sorts, and anything with science in it is alright by me . Subliminal facial expressions are also fascinating subjects (like people tend to look to the left before lying and so on). Lie To Me, the TV show, seems to have quite a bit of fact in a drama context relating to this.

Take care and keep reading.......

Mics

I can identify lots of non-verbal stuff.
But I sometimes make people upset by doing things and they respond angrily and I ask them what I should do and they become even angrier and it makes no sense.
I smile without making sounds, usually.
Nothing shows brains like functioning.
I hate how people connect completely random things with eachother, such as job performance and social inclusion or intelligence and colour.
I hate that this is slowly creeping up on me, too.

Oddly enough, I'm actually a theatre education major. I have noticed, however, that when those around me critique a performance I often don't understand what they mean or didn't notice things they did. I struggled in my acting class. The teacher said he could tell that I was used to hiding my emotions. I didn't know how to react cause that wasn't really the case. I thought I had given it my all in the scenes we were working.
Thanks for the response. Is there a movie you would recommend?

Last edited by A-markz on 31 Mar 2010, 9:49 pm, edited 1 time in total.