Thellie wrote:
Early on in our friendship I noticed he seemed to get a kick out of me laughing. I'm an easy laugher and can also be easily lost in a total gigglefit. No matter if I chuckled at him or at what he said, me laughing triggers his stand up comedian gene, he will at times stretch whatever joke or funny thing said or done till its a dead horse and then beat it a bit afterwards - just to keep me laughing - or so it seems.
After reading about Aspergers, I wondered if this is a trait of his, possibly that due to uncertainty of body language and such there is one feature that feels 100% as positive feedback to him - laughter. And that this is why he strives towards it?
To me, its a pleasure either way. And after years of knowing one another I find it adorable the way he peeks in my direction after dropping a joke, anticipating my reaction.
And yes, that IS cute. <3
Clowning is definitely one of my main weapons when I'm with people......and yes it does have less of an ambiguous feedback than a lot of social gestures do. As long as you can tell the difference between a belly laugh and a throat laugh then you know which jokes worked and which fell flat. It's even more so in the performing arts......you can play music and they'll just applaud by default, but with stand-up comedy, they won't force a laugh if you haven't amused them. So yes, I think it's quite possible that your friend has tapped into comedy because it's a social tool with clear, immediate feedback. It's also a good way of feeling really close to people, there's something about collective laughter that cuts through a lot of the drivel.
I was with a lady who got the giggles the other night......a few years ago I'd have thought it must be me that was amusing her, and I would have started feeding the fire with wisecracks, but this one is rather special, like you, she wasn't laughing at me or with me, she was just laughing.
It's amazing - the whole laughter process seems to be internal for her, as if she's got a built-in comedy show in her head......I've got one too but I've learned to keep it reasonably secret, so that I don't make people think I'm weird. And because I knew that, I was able to provide a foil for her giggling, so that the crowd wouldn't think she was weird (imagine the difference between sitting alone giggling, and giggling with an attentive friend who is also giggling), and of course I don't think she's weird at all, I thoroughly enjoyed the evening and I still giggle when I remember it. Never saw anything like it before from anybody who doesn't use alcohol or reefer.