Asperger's and skin sensitivity

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I have a very hard time with being touched unexpectedly, and if someone DOES touch me, they need to be firm about it. And they had better not be sweaty. I feel kind of bad because I know sometimes I push my family away, and it offends them, but I REALLY can't stand being touched a lot of times.

There are other textures that just drive me up a wall, too.

I startle VERY easily at loud noises, too, but skin sensitivity is the worst.

I dunno if it's possible for an "NT" to have these sorts of issues...while this is one of the traits that makes me think I could be on the spectrum, I also think it would be good to know if this can exist independently (or in conjunction with just ADHD)...

i know exactly what you mean there! i think i have the exact same thing.
once when i was working in a shop i had my back turned and was sorting through a display and a very small and quietly-spoken customer (obviously in a kind of shy way) wanted to get my attention so she came over and very gently put her fingertips at the top of my back, sort of between my shoulder blades in a stroking motion. at the same time she spoke to me so i didn't get a shock from being suddenly touched but her voice and her whole demeanour where so calm, on the contrary, i felt like a wave of tingling ran all the way from the ends of my hair to my toes and my body kind of turned to jelly.. like that amazing soothing feeling you get from a massage. it actually sent me reeling and as i turned around to attend to her i could feel my head going all fuzzy like i was in some kind of super-relaxed stupor.

after that i noticed that whenever i'm in a situation where people are talking very calmly and quietly, or almost in a whisper (like a library), if i'm touched or something brushes past me i get that exact same feeling again. it's very, very odd!

one other thing (this is going to sound really wrong ok..) when i want to relax, i stroke myself like my arms, my back, my neck and my head, applying a very gentle and consistent pressure with the tips of my fingernails so it's almost a light scraping motion. sometimes when i can't sleep i just lay in bed with my arms stretched upwards towards the ceiling and repeat this motion up and down the length of them. the pull of gravity on them in this position feels very relaxing aswell.

I'm very sensitive. My doctor can never examine me, even. No matter how hard I try, I can't stay still.

I thought this was normal.

Every time my palms (or the soles of my feet) touch water, my skin feels painfully dry for hours afterwards, and while touching certain fabrics or materials is normally uncomfortable at the best of times, in this dry state it is even worse, and gives off a sensation which is almost like being electrocuted.

I was going to make a thread asking if anyone knew of any kind of hand lotion or something which would fix this, but I suppose this thread is as good as any. It seriously gets to the point where I want to spit on my hands just to get some relief, but obviously I can't do that. I've tried a couple of creams and none of them do anything to get rid of the effect, the skin just gets all slimey on top of the nasty electric dryness, creating an additional problem to deal with and leaving me trying to wipe annoying wet stuff off onto materials which are just as annoying.

I refuse to believe there is no solution for this problem though. If something exists which can cause this effect then of course there must be something that can reverse it too. Does anyone have any secret technique that they use to deal with this kind of thing?

one other thing (this is going to sound really wrong ok..) when i want to relax, i stroke myself like my arms, my back, my neck and my head, applying a very gentle and consistent pressure with the tips of my fingernails so it's almost a light scraping motion. sometimes when i can't sleep i just lay in bed with my arms stretched upwards towards the ceiling and repeat this motion up and down the length of them. the pull of gravity on them in this position feels very relaxing aswell.[/quote]

I do this too...often =)

Have you tried using creams that have some kind of anesthetic in them, like creams for insect bites? I'm not sure how safe they are to use extensively, so please do some research first, don't just take my suggestion.

Yeah, I don't like being touched, it makes me want to jump out of my skin. I feel bad because it's an involuntary reaction - that instant recoiling I do. And it's much worse when it's a light touch. I've only ever been able to tolerate it with my SO and he knows there's a limit to my tolerance. I wish it didn't bother me so much. I notice when other people touch each other, too and I'm 100% baffled by it. Complete mystery.

I don't mind touch in the context of fighting though, like martial arts or rough housing. That I like.

I had never thought to try that. Is this something you've discovered yourself or is there some special reasoning behind it?

I've never used insect bite cream so I wouldn't know if they are effective at numbing the skin in that manner, which is what I assume the anaesthetic is for, but it is an interesting suggestion that I will look into, thanks.

If it works it works, if it doesn't, there are surely plenty of other things to try.

I've had dry skin forever - it was very extreme at one point and I've had to be very careful ever since, so I've tried lots of different remedies. Do you use real soap? Because there are some that are much less drying. Like you might want to stay away from ones labeled "bars" because if the word soap doesn't appear on the label then it's actually a detergent which is much harsher on the skin. I go to a natural market and get Kiss My Face Olive Oil soap. It's not hard milled, so you have to keep it out of water. If there's a little water in the dish it'll melt right away.

At night, when you sleep, try putting 100% shea butter on your palms and soles of your feet. You'll want to avoid any that aren't just 100% and any with fragrances. It is the best moisturizer I've found.

if someone so much as puts a hand NEAR my head or my belly, i will FREAK OUT

The tags on shirts drive me nuts...I have always ripped them out.

Although it sounds disgusting, as a kid, from about 9 to 14, I did spit on my hands several times a day, because it was like you describe - all the time. Weird, but just reading your post has made my palms and soles of my feet react exactly like it used to be - uggh. Dry, creepy, intensely sensitive. I can't even stand my fingers touching each other! Oh well. it will go away. Once I got hold of hand lotion, I replaced spitting with that, I used it obsessively several times a day for years. But then I just got allergic to whatever is in the products. I've tried all sorts of different things.

Anyway. A light unscented hand-lotion works on a temporary basis, lasts maybe an hour.
Fisherman's strength hand lotion is more successful, but replaces one unpleasant sensation with a less intrusive different one.
Therapeutic hand creams can be effective but 'thick and tacky'. Might be ok while you're asleep. All these things only have a temporary effect.
Using analgesic creams may be a bad idea, that can cause skin reactions.

You could investigate taking standard over-the-counter vitamin E supplements for a few weeks.

Vegetable/nut oils help the most. (Not baby oil, that's mineral oil.) Even plain olive oil, but it's pungent. Possibly the best is pure avocado oil (try a health shop). Use it in drops, not palm-fulls, so you get just enough to rub in without residue. Getting rid of too much oil is a real problem! If you try to use it regularly for a few weeks you might find the dryness much less of a problem.

I don't like being touched without permission, and I don't like wearing tags. Also, I sometimes get crawling sensations and when I was a child I was really itchy all the time.

i get that too. sometimes it feels like bugs crawling on my skin. i have leapt out of bed and inspected my bedding to see if there were actual bugs. and i have a hard time with a fan or open car window blowing in my face because every single hair that touches my face annoys me and makes me itch. i sometimes use one of those pet hair rollers on the inside of my clothes before putting them on.

also i'm always rearranging my hair. when i put it up, if one hair pulls wrong, it hurts and i have to do it over. if it's down, i don't like the way it feels touching my skin so i usually end up putting it up.

i think it is.