Why are many people happy to be diagnosed with AS?

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clumsybee
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21 Aug 2010, 5:57 pm

Having the diagnosis helped explain a lot of what went wrong in the past and why I've never had any friends. I'm not so much happy I have AS, it's more that I know why I'm so different from the majority of people.



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21 Aug 2010, 5:57 pm

flyingkittycat wrote:
I don't understand why the OP has 6 posts and declares people are happy to be diagnosed as autistic. Where did you gather your assumptions from?


He didn't assume anything.


FAss wrote:
Usually, people don't get happy when they are diagnosed with a mental illness or a disability.


Ergo, he's addressing only those that did.


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21 Aug 2010, 5:58 pm

Why are people unhappy to be diagnosed with AS? I mean, you can get access to services that you need because of it (not always, but the diagnosis is the first step). You can also understand why you are the way you are, which clears up all the confusion (which can be very damaging).

Stigma is not a legitimate reason to not be happy with a diagnosis (in my opinion) because you'd only be re-inforcing the stigma if you are ashamed of the diagnosis. The first step to fighting stigma is to accept (difficult but doable).

Not wanting to be treated differently is also a silly reason to not want the diagnosis because chances are that the people around you won't treat you much differently anyway. They know you- they recognise you - they aren't going to suddenly treat you like a changeling just because of the diagnosis (unless they're stupid). Also, if people start to treat you negatively because of it, f**k them- they're idiots!

Wanting to be "normal" (similar to the stigma issue) is not a good enough reason to not want a diagnosis because "normal" is such a subjective term. Why would you want to be like "normal people"? Why is that so important? What is the definition of "normal" to you, anyway? Will it make you happy? I doubt it.

Sorry if i sound bitchy, but I wanted to make that point.



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21 Aug 2010, 6:13 pm

FAss wrote:
Usually, people don't get happy when they are diagnosed with a mental illness or a disability.


That's a bold statement. It would be interesting to see if there's any large-scale research into it.

Though it tallies with personal experience:

Doctor: You're depressed.
Me: Well yeah, but that's not it.

Doctor: You're avoiding society.
Me: Well yeah, but that's not it.

Doctor: You're angry.
Me: Well yeah, but that's not it.

Doctor: You're sexually confused.
Me: Well yeah, but that's not it.

Get the idea? ^^


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21 Aug 2010, 6:34 pm

Ambivalence wrote:
FAss wrote:
Usually, people don't get happy when they are diagnosed with a mental illness or a disability.


That's a bold statement. It would be interesting to see if there's any large-scale research into it.


I really don't think the statement was meant as blanket fact, but rather an admission of the OP's perception. If taken as such, perceptions are what they are, and don't require research. That statement, taken in conjunction with the question, "Why are some happy with it?" reveals the OP clearly understands there are different reactions with different people. He simply wants to know why those who are happy, are.

No harm in asking though, I suppose.


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21 Aug 2010, 6:35 pm

FAss wrote:
I am not saying you are wrong, I am just curious. Usually, people don't get happy when they are diagnosed with a mental illness or a disability.


---

My feeling is that people want correct diagnoses.

A diagnosis of central auditory processing disorder (CAPD), when it fits, is better than misdiagnosing the person as having perfect hearing or being completely deaf. A diagnosis of ADHD Inattentive, when it fits, is better than misdiagnosing the person as having a type of epilepsy such as petit mal/absence/complex partial and so on or as being completely neurologically normal. A diagnosis of Asperger, when it fits, is better than misdiagnosing a person as having learning disabilities when they have Asperger, not learning disabilities.

I believe that a correct diagnosis tends to produce happiness and an incorrect diagnosis unhappiness.

That's my understanding.

People hate being wrongly diagnosed due to wasted time and money due to the ignorance of the persons involved in a wrong diagnosis.

By the way, Asperger is not a mental illness any more than dyslexia is.

http://www.hbo.com/movies/temple-grandin/index.html



Last edited by pgd on 21 Aug 2010, 10:03 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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21 Aug 2010, 7:43 pm

buryuntime wrote:
Most people have been wondering what is wrong with them for years, or in turn parents who are being blamed for bad parenting skills when in reality their child is just autistic. It's good to be able to understand the problem and help obtain services to help, I don't see any other reason to be happy over it however.


When my son was diagnosed with autism at the age of six, it was like a huge weight lifted from my shoulders.

He used to do all kinds of socially inappropriate things, especially when he was with groups of other kids. People would say, "He's testing you. You need to be firm with him." So I'd take away privileges and sternly tell him how unhappy I was with him. That just made it worse, not better. So I tried offering him rewards for appropriate social behavior. That backfired too, because I was asking him to do something he couldn't do. Knowing that he was unable to earn the reward just put more pressure on him, and made him do even more "weird" stuff.

At the time, I had no clue that he was unable to "act appropriately". I could not understand why he was choosing to be defiant, but I didn't know what else it could be. If he had been mentally ret*d, or had some kind of physical difference, then I might have guessed there was some kind of neurological problem. But he was brilliant and articulate.

When I learned about AS, everything fell into place. It was such a relief to know that he wasn't being "defiant" and I wasn't a bad mom. I just needed to approach parenting in a different way with him. Just knowing that was a huge help.



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21 Aug 2010, 7:52 pm

My reasons:

It finally confirmed that there was a reason for my problems besides laziness and stupidity.

A correct diagnosis increases the likelyhood of getting useful help.


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21 Aug 2010, 7:55 pm

FAss wrote:
I am not saying you are wrong, I am just curious. Usually, people don't get happy when they are diagnosed with a mental illness or a disability.


Because it's nice to have a fairly well-known term to describe my quirks and atypical thinking processes?

People with AS know they're different, usually from a very young age. Being diagnosed merely gives us the terminology to describe ourselves.


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21 Aug 2010, 7:56 pm

FAss wrote:
I am not saying you are wrong, I am just curious. Usually, people don't get happy when they are diagnosed with a mental illness or a disability.


Um. The diagnosis didn't GIVE us Aspergers or Autism. We had that before.

People with AS know they're different, usually from a very young age. Being diagnosed merely gives us the terminology to describe ourselves.


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21 Aug 2010, 8:02 pm

I was happy. I'd been on the diagnostic merry-go-round, and finally having a diagnosis that actually fit was a huge relief. Actually defining the problem goes a long way toward solving it.

That said, I'm happy to be autistic because I'm happy to be me. It's really not any more complicated than that.


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21 Aug 2010, 8:32 pm

flyingkittycat wrote:
I don't understand why the OP has 6 posts and declares people are happy to be diagnosed as autistic. Where did you gather your assumptions from? The internet or actual people you've met? Did they say that they were happy or did you come to the conclusion that because someone openly admitted they were autistic that it must mean they have no shame and are happy? Why should any of us feel ashamed? I also hear that more autistic children are out in the open playing at the playgrounds with other children, eating at restaurants, going to stores with their parents and going to the zoo with all of the non autistic children. Do you feel parents should hide those kids from public viewing? If so, what are your reasons?


Hi flyingkittycat,
I would like to clear up any confusion. I never suggested anyone should be ashamed about being autistic. I just wondered why some people (not all of them) are only happy once they get diagnosed with AS and are not happy before that. In addition, a few people on this forum get disappointed when a health professional tells them they do not have it. I do a lot of reading here, just don't post that much.
In my opinion, there is nothing wrong with not being diagnosed with anything at all as long as you get help for your specific problems. Those problems don't really need to be united into a syndrome, and sometimes they are not medical problems at all, just common everyday problems.



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21 Aug 2010, 8:42 pm

Willard wrote:
Celoneth wrote:
I was happy that I finally knew what was wrong with me. I was happy that I wasn't the only person on the planet that felt the way I did and that I wasn't broken or defective. Also, it's become one of my major interests so I was happy to have something new to research and obsess over. I wasn't happy that it was something permanent and had been affecting my life in a lot of ways I never realised.



^This^

Dumbass, idiot, lout, freak, jerk, weirdo, oddball, schmuck, lazy, senseless, stubborn, out-of-touch, emotionally ret*d, unfeeling, callous, selfish, whiny, useless, weak, standoffish, shy, socially inept, snob, elitist, dreamer, brain damaged, different, procrastinator, nut, eccentric, eclectic, crackpot, scary, overgrown child, stupid, head-in-the-clouds, sh*t fer brains, strange, clumsy, loon, user, rebel, problem child, odd-man-out, goofball, douchebag, card, character, oaf, throwback, insubordinate, uncooperative, @ssh*le..

Just a few of the terms used to describe me over the course of my life by people I've known, including my parents, many of my teachers and almost all of my employers to name a few, and not one of them was smiling when they said it.

After all that, to realize that what they were all describing was not me - it was their reaction to my Autism - was a tremendous and cathartic relief. Not happy that I had Autism, but happy to discover that my differences from the rest of the world HAD A NAME AND A CAUSE, and others were having these problems, too.


Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I would like to ask you a question: when they called you those names, did you think something was wrong with you? I am more inclined to think that something was wrong with them.



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21 Aug 2010, 8:46 pm

clumsybee wrote:
Having the diagnosis helped explain a lot of what went wrong in the past and why I've never had any friends. I'm not so much happy I have AS, it's more that I know why I'm so different from the majority of people.


Are you sure you never had ANY friends? One or two good friends is quite enough, I think.



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21 Aug 2010, 8:47 pm

FAss wrote:
Those problems don't really need to be united into a syndrome, and sometimes they are not medical problems at all, just common everyday problems.



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FAss
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21 Aug 2010, 8:52 pm

Ambivalence wrote:
FAss wrote:
Usually, people don't get happy when they are diagnosed with a mental illness or a disability.


That's a bold statement. It would be interesting to see if there's any large-scale research into it.

Though it tallies with personal experience:

Doctor: You're depressed.
Me: Well yeah, but that's not it.

Doctor: You're avoiding society.
Me: Well yeah, but that's not it.

Doctor: You're angry.
Me: Well yeah, but that's not it.

Doctor: You're sexually confused.
Me: Well yeah, but that's not it.

Get the idea? ^^


Get the idea loud and clear.
how about this:
Doctor: There is nothing wrong with you, you just need to worlk on your self-esteem.
You: 'Well yeah, but that's not it" - thus proving the doctor right.