How old is too old to live with your parent for an autistic?

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I'm 28 and looking to move out soon, but I'm afraid. I'm afraid that I'll lose my job and have to move back, I'm afraid I won't know what to do in an emergency, I'll miss the presence of my parents when I'm depressed or need advice on something, and I don't know what awaits me (which is why I'd rather live with a friend or someone who knows me already- much less stress than a NT stranger who doesn't would never be sympathetic to my slight oddness.)

I'm not looking for sympathy, because most of you made the leap when you were much younger, but I've had more than just aspergers. I just want to know, what are the preparations I should be working toward if I'm ever to move out permanently? Please, all advice is welcome!

I'm just a few days shy of 31 and still stuck at home. Of course having Asperger's - and not being able to drive - are factors.

I don't think people should make such a big deal out of being stuck at home with one's parents, especially with the economy the way it's been the past several years...

Tim (aka the Slipperman)

i stopped living with my parents when i went to college. haven't lived with them since.

Depends on who is passing judgment on you about it and how much it matters to you. Typically, in the USA 28 would be considered late.

I ended back with my parents and am 41 now. It's probably a bit different as I look after them (somewhat; not all the time) now, which is seen as a redeeming feature.

This is presuming one has a decent job. You need a decent job for this to be true.

I'm about 40 days shy of my 20th birthday, and I still live at home with my parents. They insist that I live with them for as long as they're alive, and then move into an assisted living facility afterwards. My parents really enjoy my company and they tell me that they'd be heartbroken if I left home. Besides, they say that I'm at the "lower end of high functioning" on the autistic spectrum. In other words, I can function decently, but not enough to be able to live on my own.

For the first part or the second part? As far as the second, I'm on disability, which may be another "redeeming" factor. Mostly, I don't really talk to anyone and don't give a crap about what they think. But that's probably easier at my age.

Like someone else said, given the economy I hope the public is lightening up about young folks being at home longer than usual. Especially folks on the spectrum.

At 23 I seem to still really care what people think. Any idea what age this goes away.


Also, I have a job paying 12.50 an hour.....but its back breaking work

I've moved out at the age of 32. I felt a little cramped, and I needed room to grow and be myself. I abused my first two summers of freedom, living the punk rock lifestyle, but I got my feet back on the ground, last September.

We mature at a rate of 2/3 to 3/4 of the average NT. Say the age for an NT to move out is 21. The age we move out should be 28 to 31.5. Using the 18 standard, we should move out anywhere from 24 to 27.

Well, if you're out in the world, not living like a hermit like me, it's a lot harder. I think it's mostly when the dire consequences of reality are more of a threat than other people's opinions. Or, doing back-breaking work and seeing judgments from people who have never worked that hard.

I saw an article in the paper about baby-boomers whining about how the current 20's generation isn't just like them. When they were 20, you get a job without college and support a family on it. Those days are OVER. They're not qualified to judge, but they do it anyway. IMO, that's usually the case.

I don't care about what most people think because they will never live in my shoes. How can they say what's right for me? Practicality will take you further in life than beating yourself up. Being realistic and practical will save you a lot of grief. I'm thankful that I'm one of the more asocial aspies.

If you're Asian and single, you're never too old. Many Asian parents dread having an empty nest.

I live alone, which can be isolating, if you know someone you could deal with for long periods of time, it would probably be better. I could not deal with a random roomate again, and I would not suggest it.

This is what I would do if I had to move out again. some sound ridiculous, but for what it's worth:

- work on a detailed budget, and try to save what you can.
I found living to a proper budget stressful, knowing things like the target $ per day for each of food, drink and entertainment helped. You might not be able to avoid moving back, if you do loose your job, but if you save a little bit of buffer money can give yourself time to figure out what to do.

- make a list of the little stuff you use while living at home
Anything from toilet paper to salt. There is allot of little things you have to keep in stock, its hard to remember what they all are.

- have a backup meal
A food that lasts forever and is easy to prepare (ie canned). For when you don't have time or can't deal with buying or making real food

- if you rent in a apartment or condo building to begin with, then you don't have to be concerned about most emergencies.

- have a backup key

- have a system that reminds you about bills, or other todo list stuff (remember the milk is great)

- if the subject of your post is a concise question, people may never read the OP

I'm in a pretty much the same situation,accept i'm on disability. I have huge savings though so its not a financial issue. I think the level of stess i can deal with is extremely low so basically i sit around in a chair opoided out of my eyeballs (i just watched that gluten casein free diet video) and am capable of little else. Why even make the effort to move out when it's just going to make me isolated and stressed? I agree with you that the ideal situation is living with someone we actually know and guess what? Thats what we are doing! Mainly its the pychological issues i find troubling- from feeling like a child and not feeling like a proper independent adult. Even though i am and can do what i like.

IDK. My reaction to all stressors is just "avoid". i really should move out but i'm incapable of doing something so stressful for so little real gain.

OMG I'm 28 and I'm moving out today!

Anyway as other posters have said, it depends on if you have a job or other source of income and if you can take care of yourself. I have multiple things wrong that hinder me. I am moving to a disabled/elderly community and also near other relatives than the ones I live with now, so if you do move out and need support, make sure you got it.

Good luck!