I will feel so lost

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I am going to feel so lost if i am not dx with asperger's. my first appt is tomorrow. and I have identified with asperger's for 6 years. It's explained a lot about me and how i do thing, and I understand myself more.

But everyone i know is certain I have asperger's or high functioning autism... just that the Dr's never see it.

What symptoms do other people notice in you? Maybe it's because you're a female. The symptoms for girls are somewhat different than they are for boys, and the male symptoms of Asperger's are more well-known, even among professionals. As a result, many females with Asperger's go undiagnosed even after seeing professionals.

Good luck with your diagnosis.
Even if you don't get diagnosed that doesn't mean you don't have it.
If you're sure you have it and you've done you research then who can say you don't have it?
I remember I had to get diagnosed a second time because the first wasn't official and I doubted it. I don't know why. I'm so obviously autistic. I would marry my special interest, at a specific time, cancelled if there's cloudy weather or fog (or cancelled if I miss a celestial event or Through the Wormhole on Discovery Science), and there will be no more than five guests attending.

Well, if you're not officially "asperger's" what about PDD-NOS if you have some traits, whether severe or mild?

Well, as a 12 year old I was obsessed with singers and knew lyrics forwards and backwards, i would drive everyone nuts cause that's all i would talk about.

when I was 14 i got into drawing, and that's all i would talk about and show people my artwork even if it drove them nuts.

I have had obsessons like this off and on through out my life. My current one is ipod touch 4.
I am like a broken record when it comes to talking about things i have learned or into. However if i do not know someone, i do not speak. I can speak to sales clerks if i need something, but not to people at church. I avoid social gatherings as much as possible. I do not do small talk.

I kept my fingers in my ears as a child, loud sounds would make me have a meltdown, smells also make me have a meltdown. now that i am profoundly deaf i can still hear with my hearing aids, i turn them off 90% of the time cause noise still bother my, I no longer need to put my fingers in my ears cause i can only hear with hearing aids. going shopping is hard for me cause of the noise. when i get in a car i have to turn the radio off. as my family requires me to keep my hearing aids turned on.

everything must be in the same order, as a teen I had to watch 1 show, my mom knew then that i had some form of autism, but dr's never saw it. I get very upset when my routine is changed. I am already worried about the holidays cause it's not going to be at my house, we have stocked up on weighted belts, wrist weights and a weighted blanket to help relax me.

I eat the same foods every day, i do not try new things. if i do change and go out to eat it must be something i am familiar with.

all conversations are one sided, i do not have any friends really, they tolorate me but it's not a 2 way friendship.

I do stim, my mom just said tonight that i have done the hand flapping, rocking, humming etc. but not extreme to put me in a classic autism catagory. As a child i would go outside and spin and spin, then we got a spinner for therapy and i used it for fun when i wasn't doing thereapy for dyslexia.

I have had several people recently tell me i have asperger's. they don't even know me well. someone that hasn't seen me for 10+ years saw my mother and asked her how high functioning I was.

Don't be too distraught if you do not get a diagnosis. Alot goes into a diagnosis. It took a long time, and many years of observations to find out I had AS, and I was not even aware of what it was until I was in my 40s. You need to display somewhere around 80 traits or so to get a diagnosis. It is also complicated by the overlap of symptoms between AS and other disorders like ADD and OCD, as a couple of examples. In any case, good luck with your diagnosis.

You know what?

1. A diagnosis is not an identity, it's only a set of behaviors that are listed in a book. Maybe you're just quirky, and you'll always be quirky without having a label slapped on you.

2. Doctors make mistakes- I was briefly diagnosed as bipolar because I went through puberty mood swings prematurely.

well, i do not work, I get distracted with tiny details of things, that actually holding down a job would be very hard like at a store, i'd find myself looking at the stuff instead of working.

I am really artistic, and would rather make a living with my art, but i am such a perfectionist that my art rarely gets to being sold. I cannot do deadlines or take orders. so whatever i create is what is sold.and for very little money. but that's what i want to do for work.

when I was in high school, the teachers put me at my own table at the far end of the room. cause they considered me slow because I have a hard time processing what is being said, but I would read library books during class on whatever my interest was because i'd be done with my work books 10 minutes into the class thankfully they didn't know that because they didn't pay attention to me really, so i just read my books i brought. it's just that whatever they were teaching, i wasn't into learning about. If I did any extra credit assignments, or any research papers, i'd get in trouble if they sounded too good as if i had read something and just copied it. they never realized i was smart and could write research papers. I was very into studying the dictionary also, so when I passed spelling tests, they accused me of cheating. they considered me slow to the point they refused to let me take an art class cause they thought i would be made fun of thankfully my mom fought for that and i got in and was the best in the class.

When I changed schools, I did a year of researching on a subject for my science fair and got a blue ribbon, the principle asked my mom if she did the report for me. even the people at my new school thought i was slow.

I do come off as slow. but i am not, i have processing problems, I figured I was horrible in math until I decided I didn't want to spend alot of $ on groceries and learned how to use coupons and got $435 worth of groceries for $35 one time, then once with my mother she had $25 in her account and told me i could spend only that, i got $250 worth of groceries for $21, that's when my mother figured out it wasn't actually math i was bad in, it was the problems for school I couldn't do.

I do lack empathy, say rude things, but never on purpose. I take everything literally. and do not make eye contact.

The person at my disability job network helps me with finding the right job. Before she would help me look for jobs in photography but then because I switched my interests now she is trying to get me a job in stage light operating. And she always asks me how I think I'll cope in certain jobs. She also likes my web design.
So, I highly recommend getting job support if you get diagnosed.

Would you be interested in posting your art work?

http://www.dailypainters.com/

You might sell something that way. And you could get in touch with other artists, and they could explain all the other stuff they do to sell, such as a website or a store on eBay.