Feeling different

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I honestly don't know. I mean it's obvious I've felt one way or another in certain parts of my life but the rest of the time it just feels like it's asking the wrong question.

I feel perfectly normal and even sociable with a group sometimes... if I'm in a room full of cats.

I'm not sure when I first realised it. I remember playing with the neighbour kids when I was small but I never had much in common with them. I didn't like it when they messed up my stuff either. Recently I've learned that "having affection for things rather than people" is a sign of AS. That seems accurate in my case.

I have always felt different all because of how I saw how other kids functioned and what they did and how I was treated. I didn't know what was so different about me then. I also figured it was how I was treated too so that's what also made me different. It was a feeling I had then.

Then I started to feel normal in high school when I realized everyone had aspie moments and does the same oopsies as me. So why did it make me that different? I think I got high self esteem so I started to feel normal and not so different. I only feel that way sometimes now.

I've got low self-esteem, but I still don't feel different. I used to feel like ''the shy one'' at school, and I felt that everyone else had better abilities than I did. But after I left school and experienced different locations (college, work experiences, job centres, courses, my voluntary job), meeting hundreds of different people have really opened my eyes. I have come across some very weird and wonderful people since I left school, and whether I'm different or not, I will never feel different towards them because there are some odd people about.

I knew one rough woman who lived up my street, and she have 5 kids, and an obsession with ironing boards. She used to be seen every day carrying ironing boards about, and people used to laugh at her because the ironing boards didn't just represent part of her job (she didn't have a job anyway), they represented part of her weirdness. And she used to put her kids naked in the buggy when they were babies, even on a cold day.

I'm glad I'm not as stupid and weird as that.

I feel different around I'd say 75% of people. I tend to get along well only with slightly offbeat people.

Yes, I always felt "different" as a child, and usually still do now. Part of that has to do with the fact that I'm transgender, but certainly part has to do with being on the autism spectrum. I remember being a little kid and half-believing that I was born on a different planet and was taken to earth as an experiment, and that the clock in my room was actually a video camera that recorded everything that I did so that my parents could watch it later. Yes, I was a bit paranoid. But really, yeah, I do feel "different."

Sometimes, thought, I wonder whether NTs would also say that they feel different. I mean, people like being unique and special, at least to some extent, and I don't imagine that people like admitting that they're really the same as everyone else. Plus, how can people know exactly what's going on in other people's minds? They might just assume that they're different, even if they're not. So I can't be sure that feeling "different" is really just an Aspie thing, or if it's more of a human thing. But then again, I could just think that because I don't understand what's going on in other people's minds. Maybe other people actually do.

I've always felt different for as long as I can remember. I've never really desired to fit in. Never craved company/friendship. I've had friends but with me, it's like if a person is not in my life for any length of time, I tend to forget about them. Even with family. That's not to say I don't love or care about them. I just seem to be to busy with my own things

It's not just about feeling different.

You know when people walk they dog.

Thats how felt when i was around NT's and tried to be social, i was like the third wheel or 5th wheel whatever you call it, like you dont belong, you are just there for the ride, and not anyone you miss you if you were not there.

Definitely not a nice feeling.

But i was different even as a kid. I remember my mother telling stories of me not being like other children, i would say sit around on the floor before and after i learned to walk and play with my stuff. Ive always been kinda self contained, i didn even need one of those beds, that most kids have, im not sure what its called on english, but its tremme seng on danish, bar bed, bed with bars, you know so parents can do other stuff and the child doesnt vanish or get hurt.

Since as long as I can remember. I was always the smartest. I was always the last one picked for teams. I was always the one who didn't fit in the group. I was always the one who saw things others didn't. I was always the one who was picked on. I was always the one who looked odd.

My whole life has been spent trying to adjust my behavior to fit in. I'm acting, because the real me is too unusual, too much like a little child. When I'm with people I'm hypervigilant. When I'm alone I can breathe.

I think you mean crib.

Yes, I have always felt different - I'm baffled by the universe and it seems to be baffled by me.

If I'm alone I feel just fine. If I'm in a group of people I'm not that familiar with, I feel very different. If I'm with people I know well and trust (a very select few), I feel less than different, but also not 100% normal.

I have somewhat of a skewed radar in terms of normalcy, so it's kinda hard to gauge for me...

Yes, that is the word, thank you.