Insensitive?

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I am a nice person (I think), however I hate being lied to and so I don't lie to other people. I don't force people to do stuff but I make my thoughts very clear. When someone has done something that is good I show them praise (or try to) but when someone is having trouble I tell them what I solidly believe is the truth, no matter how harsh it is. I try to be kind about it but I think sometimes I come across a little harsh.

I think possibly I might come across as insensitive?

"the truth no matter how harsh it is." yes I think that comes across to most people as insensitive. It's probably what I would do, maybe it's an aspie thing.

yup, it probably is just an aspie thing.

Insensitive? We all struggle with this, but I try not to be too harsh, because I don't always like the harsh truth told to me. Little bits at a time are easier to swallow. I don't say I always succeed at my attempts, but I try!

I ALWAYS did that, and I STILL try. Interesting thing:

I went to my fathers this last week. I couldn't stomach what I was offered for food, so I wanted to get floss(which I needed), and something to eat. SIMPLE! I knew RIGHT where to go, had been there before, etc... I made a BIG mistake! I let my step mother know! She said "would you get some other stuff for me?". I said "SURE!"! Every nuance of my plan changed. It was VERY dark and I was in an unknown area, etc... I ended up getting hurt real bad, and half way through my errands I phoned them to let them know I needed ice for my growing injury. I FINISHED my errands(YEP folks, injury and all, I finished them, but never got anything for ME to eat BTW), and went back. NO ice, plenty of DELAYS, etc... Meanwhile my injury was growing. I didn't even get a thankyou for my trouble. But I was probably considered insensitive because of the modest request, etc... This leg could probably have healed by yesterday but, because of poor care, it just started to heal. It may not be somewhat back to normal until wednesday, if I'm lucky!

Oh well, I hope they enjoyed the yogurt and pudding. 8-(

Yep, no good deed goes unpunished.

Steve

To most people, it does appear insensitive. I usually lie a lot, but this is because I'm really afraid that telling the truth may give the other person information which may be used against me, or give that person a clue that I'm a easy target for manipulation.

However, I don't lie to spare the other person's feelings. I lie to avoid giving information which may be used against me. There are people in the world who will appreciate your honesty though, so it doesn't mean your honesty will make you appear insensitive to everyone.

I've been the same way most of my life too. I carefully guard information about myself which probably makes me appear really closed off.

To acquaintances, I probably seem insensitive because I rarely respond when I think they might be upset. I always seem to say the wrong thing and I just make the situation worse. With my few friends and family, I make a more conscious effort and if I screw up, they are more inclined to forgive me.

when you tell people your true opinion, that's a good thing, you probably come accross as insensitive because of AS, i don't know the severity of your asperger's, but i know that because of the lack social skills us aspies have, ( i am repeating what i read on wiki, which i double checked, and i partially agree with it, even though i would prefer not to ) we often come accross as 'cold' and 'insensitive', it's because we have trouble conveying our feelings, i sometimes will be called 'jerk', or other things, more related to 'unfeeling' at school, don't worry about it, your not the only one. Besides, you know your not insensitive, right? so it doesn't matter what others think, especially if they don't understand you

There is a whole "political speak" that I can grasp in the abstract(...listen to Bush and other government do "double speak")I just cant do it when upset.I can when I am writing but when I am in the middle of job and irritated with someones laziness I can not hide my irritation.I cant think clearly enough to phrase things in a polite manor,when stressed.I can not seem to control the tone or volume of my voice or the consternation on my face.I am also a horrible liar,though I had years of practice on my parents....usually it isnt telling a lie as often as just leaving out information.If someone asks me a direct question they will likely get an honest answer.I have warned people of this when they ask me something if I dont think they will like the answer.On the other hand.....when I give a compliment,it couldnt be more sincere.I have to be very impressed to say something nice.