Scared of the Wrath of NTs

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I don't know I have manipulated my bosses to fire someone on several jobs and not to mention talked co-workers into hating another co-worker by telling them what they said behind their backs or by making something believeable up. They are easy to manipulate if you know what you are doing.

There is nothing funnier in my opinion than having some as*hole co-worker talk garbage to me while they are eating a lunch they let me prepare for them. The idiots would sit there calling me names all day long then ask me to fry up some chicken wings for them. I use to put wings in the back of the cooler so they would get nice and slimey so I could serve them to the idiots I worked with. I would also spit in the wing sauce I served coated them in. They had so little respect for me they thought I was not smart enough to mess with their food when making it. I was hoping they would get sick enough to mess their pants when on the job or even pit them in the hospital for a day or two so I could get some peace at work. I never allowed any of those idiots to prepare my food I knew they would do the same to me if given a chance.

I think there is an inverse relationship regarding jobs. An "easy" job is far more likely to end up abusive for someone on the spectrum or someone who's different in any regard. Whereas a "hard" job is more likely to have people who are reasonable, rational, fundamentally sane, constructive, etc, etc.

One of the worse jobs I ever had was working as a checker at a grocery store. The "co-workers" (if I can even call them that!) engaged in a variety of tricky bullying behavior. The good ones didn't seem to have the skills to say, Hey, not so cool. And the "managers" were either hostile or disengaged idiots. As in, the manager was hung over, or might just have well been hung over for how little energy and interest he or she put into the job. Or, the manager was high on weed, or might just have well have been high on weed for how little he or she was actually aware of what was going on.

One of the better jobs was at H&R Block, even though unethical company, I think associates really need to inform clients of third-party bank cross-collection, even though the company only wants you to technically inform. But then the job only lasts 5 weeks anyway, might as well take some chances. But . . . I think it's great practice for being a doctor, lawyer, business professional, architect, any vocation that has face to face interaction with clients. I was generally appreciated by my clients as someone who knew taxes and knew the computer system, and who hit the high points of explaining without bogging down or overexplaining. (took me a while to learn that part!) And for two out of three years, I got a good office manager. One year, the guy appreciated that I lobbied for the underdog and he got fewer complaints from my clients than other clients. I actually got promoted to office coordinator, but that didn't work out because the district lady was so unreasonable. I should have taken medium chances earlier on to address the issues, but I didn't know. Now I do.

I wrote an essay "Tight, defensive boxing to a draw. One week." http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt134616.html

I don't want to oversell this. I briefly took some boxing lessons in 2005, and I've practiced some on my own since. If I took some more lessons, I could probably fight someone approximately my own size to a draw. That's all I'm looking for.

To a draw because I'm not trying to humiliate or embarrass someone, esp someone I'm likely to see again. Taking the medium high road. And actually I think this would work well a fair amount of time for international relations.

And please do not take a bunch of blows to the head during training because all that stuff about post-concussion syndrome and even cumulative lesser blows is largely true. And football helmets don't really protect, and probably neither does boxing headgear. Mainly, practice skills and bag work and shadow boxing.

Maybe a couple of individual lessons, then some practicing on your own, and then maybe some more individual lessons. You might be surprised at how much you can learn in a relatively short period of time.

And the goal is not to cause trouble or egg on some idiot. The goal is to have it available if need be. Kind of like insurance, you're hoping you don't need it.

So, tight, defensive boxing is a lot of blocks, primarily blows to the rib cage, some jabs to the face. How you might see two good welterweight boxers fight.

If you happen to "win" a fight, be gracious, don't make a big deal about it. If someone tries to brag on your behalf, maybe matter-of-factly say to them, don't always work that way, sorry it had to come to that.

If you happen to "lose" a fight, I guess be gracious about that, too.

And walk away from a fight if you reasonable can. Sometimes you can, and sometimes you can't.

This is what causes me anxiety the most. Getting off my arse and getting out there doing things doesn't make me anxious. It's other people who make me anxious doing these things. The way others judge you and expect you to conform and if you don't you get ridiculed, which is what you don't want either. It is so hard. It causes social anxiety, because I am just so frightened to speak up in social situations, or to stand up for myself when somebody is being unfair to me. It's so awkward for me.

When I was about 12-14, I used to buy tapes to record my voice, and on the tapes I would tell stories made up from the top of my head as I went along, saying what I wish social interaction was more like. I didn't use a narrator, just used a different voice for each character, and they said really silly, ret*d things, and nobody took any notice because it was all ''normal''. For example, one time in one of my stories I told was I was sitting on a bench with my cousin, then my cousin's next door neighbour randomly came out of her house and danced around her car, singing a made-up stupid song, and we just smiled and enjoyed the song. Now, in real life, if me and my cousin saw somebody doing that, we'd get freaked out, and the neighbour would of got took away to a nuthouse or something, then would be named and shamed.

It's probably socially easier to be NT, but I still don't think NTs live a more happier life than I do. NTs get stressed, miserable, and anxious, and they come to situations where they feel frustrated. I know lots of NTs who hate their job, but can't leave because of financial reasons. I know lots of NTs who have split up from their partners, fighting to get custody for their kids, moving back in with their parents, etc. Then I know lots who are unhappy in their marriage but can't leave for various personal reasons, and having fall-outs with people, the list goes on. At the moment I'm glad I just live at home and OK financially and don't have to deal with all that s**t. It would probably happen to me one day too, but at the moment, why worry? I just worry for them.

I only wish I was NT for social reasons. I wish I could be more social without making an arse of myself.