The autism social rule book.

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I got to about page 8 so im sorry if this rule has already been posted.

Wearing a nice smelling cologne or perfume puts you one step ahead of many people socially. I like Ungaro 3, Aqua di Gio, or Hugo Boss Soul. With girls i find Aqua di gio works best.

If in highschool without friends just trade in your lunch for an extra class period, i did this and i found myself much happier.

Girls love sympathetic guys.

If you have acne clear it up with isotretenoin (acutane), Or "exposed" product line.
Apparently physical attractiveness helps in life.

Oh Chewing gum gives you amazing breath... people dislike talking to someone who has bad breath

Don't become aggressive when somebody tells you that Malabo is not the capital city of Equatorial Guinea

Only complain to a certain extent. If you share a moan, that's OK. But if you're out with people and they're trying to have a good time, and you're just walking along acting miserable all the time, people will stop listening to you and will tell you to lighten up.

Whenever you accidentally write ''Sainsberries'' instead of ''Sainsburys'', don't keep laughing about it. I've done it before and nobody else seems to find it very funny.

I'm not sure if I've mentioned this one. If you don't agree, don't venomently express your opinion, just acknowledge. Its best just to agree with people even if you don't necessarily.

Sorry, double post due to computer error.

Stand up straight. Don't slouch. It's not good for your body and it makes you look sloppy, mad or depressed.

I was at page 10 and decided to post, hopefully these haven't been said...

-If playing a 2-player game and an NT comes along and wants to play, they may rush you. Try not to get frustrated at them rushing you, or upset if you're getting pushed out of the game. Do not point out that their behavior is rude, they may take it aggressively. In some cases volunteering your place can earn you brownie points with the person who wants to play. Always have a backup plan, such as drawing or having a book to read.

- if you're watching someone play a game, for example chess, and you notice one of the players doing something stupid Do not interrupt, say the move was stupid, cough, shake your head, or sigh. it could make someone angry. If you know the person and know they like said game and want to get better at it, wait until after the game is done and offer try to offer them advice, without being overly blunt about it.

- Always have a fairly simple backup plan. if you get frustrated you can use your backup as a comfort zone. If you're reading, drawing, or listening to music with headphones that are fairly obvious, people are less likely to disturb you, and are more likely to let 'rude' behavior go. Even putting headphones in your ears and tucking the end into your pocket can work. If people ask what you're listening to you can pretend you cant hear them or name a more mainstream song you like, however this can backfire because sometimes NT's like to grab one of your headphones and listen to your music.

-have an excuse or two thought out ahead of time in case you get bored or want time alone and wish to excuse yourself. Perhaps get an NT friend to help you think of some excuses for leaving, For example you could pull out your phone and look at any old text you have, close it and say something like "i need to go, my brother needs help with his homework". Always have a plan or two for questioning of your excuse like "couldn't it wait?" you could say "my brother's bedtime is 9"

I just have to say that this seems like a thread of horror rules for lying that would exacerbate my tells and twiches, I am sticking with my Aspie normal self.

But I do have noticed this along the years:

If you don't what to find your self in a strange cornucopia of NT oddities, do not ever eat the last piece of anything, even if you haven't had any, NTs have some weird correlation between who finishes something to eat and who ate the most of it. Choose the person who is the most "accepted" by all present people and take a piece, of lets say chips, each times that person does but not at the same time, keep eating like that unless you don't want more. This is true for most occasions unless there are special circumstances such as a birthday, where the birthday person is the one who gets to eat the most (cake). Also in general try to eat 10% less than the average of what others are eating especially if people are watching and try to eat at the same average pace than others are eating.

I don't know much about people with schizophrenia but I do know from experience with a friend that has something inside the schizophrenia spectrum that he is very sensitive when it comes to the following what is accepted within the social paradigm. I still do not know what is it I do but he gets very worked up when I do something he finds goes against social conventions. In my experience with him I would say people with schizophrenia are the most bothered by non-NT behaviour. So be extra careful.

Perhaps someone with more knowledge about people with schizophrenia can be of more help but with that friend of mine this is utterly most certainly true.