Joe90 wrote:
blackcat wrote:
I am a waste of everything. I can't do anything right. All I do is cause trouble for my family. I am a moron for ever thinking that I could do ANYTHING that normal people do. I cannot believe that I actually thought I was capable of driving, or working like a normal person, having friends, dating, ANYthing. I am a FAILURE. Why I keep trying is beyond me.
Move it, leave it, reply, dont, whatever. Nothing matters anymore.
I know that feeling, I get it every day at some point. Whenever things go wrong, I always blame myself because I've been convinced so many times that NTs are the perfect ones who can't do no wrong socially, and I'm the social problem so it's probably always me who's the responsible one for other people's sh**. It makes me feel so damn miserable that I just look at myself and ask what's the point of it all.
I can relate to both these posts. My trouble is it's become ingrained in me to always take the blame for everything that goes wrong, whether it is or isn't. I've been doing this since I was just a kid. My parents would get mad at me for something, & I would apologize for being born. They made it out to be my fault that they got stuck with me since they adopted me. I don;t blame NTs at all. If anything it's my fault I can't get along in the world....it's been like this for me since I was a toddler.
I often feel worthless & useless & like the world would be a better place if I never existed. I wish I could offer up some positive advice, but I am feeling overwhelmed with personal stuff going on in my life right now. Not sure which way is up.
_________________
If I do something right, no one remembers. If I do something
wrong, no one forgets.
Aspie Score: 173/200, NT score 31/200: very likely an Aspie
5/18/11: New Aspie test: 72/72
DX: Anxiety plus ADHD/Aspergers: inconclusive