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03 Jan 2012, 9:19 am

ghostar wrote:
Laddo wrote:
Question for NTs:

I have no special interests per se, but I do go through stages of watching entire series of TV shows back-to-back. Would you say that's a particularly non-NT thing to do or do some of you do this as well?


I don't think many NTs do this but i definitely do! I am Aspie.


NTs do this too. Especially those with a hectic work schedule. Myself and my ex (who is as NT as they come) would both find new series (or old that we missed when they were on TV) and blast through them over the weekend. I've watched things like Dexter, 24, Sons of Anarchy, The Mentalist... all episodes back to back only breaking for the loo and cooking meals. It's also a student thing I've found. Lots of the people I know at uni will have days where they'll watch a series for an entire day.



TruthTree
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07 Jan 2012, 4:18 pm

Question for Aspies please.

How can I tell the difference between:
a) When an AS person overloaded and needs to be left alone
b) When the AS person won't speak to me because he is angry with me?

Also, if the AS person is angry with me should I try to leave them alone or should I try to talk to him about it?



Moog
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07 Jan 2012, 4:24 pm

TruthTree wrote:
Question for Aspies please.

How can I tell the difference between:
a) When an AS person overloaded and needs to be left alone
b) When the AS person won't speak to me because he is angry with me?

Also, if the AS person is angry with me should I try to leave them alone or should I try to talk to him about it?


Perhaps you could arrange some kind of signal system with the aspie or aspies in your life? Signs on a door perhaps


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fraac
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07 Jan 2012, 4:30 pm

TruthTree wrote:
Question for Aspies please.

How can I tell the difference between:
a) When an AS person overloaded and needs to be left alone
b) When the AS person won't speak to me because he is angry with me?

Also, if the AS person is angry with me should I try to leave them alone or should I try to talk to him about it?


I can't speak for anyone else but for me the second one just wouldn't happen.



TruthTree
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07 Jan 2012, 5:15 pm

fraac wrote:

I can't speak for anyone else but for me the second one just wouldn't happen.


I hope this is the case..
If you don't mind, can I ask you,
what you do when you are angry with someone?

Moog wrote:
Perhaps you could arrange some kind of signal system with the aspie or aspies in your life? Signs on a door perhaps

Funny you should suggest that.
Once I made him a paper sign that said "can't talk to you right now" and asked him to put it up when he was overloaded, but it didn't work.
Maybe I didn't approach it correctly.



fraac
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07 Jan 2012, 5:29 pm

I don't get angry with people. I just react to whatever's happening at the time, I don't carry history into encounters. Not sure how common this is among aspies.



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08 Jan 2012, 3:54 pm

TruthTree wrote:
Question for Aspies please.

How can I tell the difference between:
a) When an AS person overloaded and needs to be left alone
b) When the AS person won't speak to me because he is angry with me?

Also, if the AS person is angry with me should I try to leave them alone or should I try to talk to him about it?


I would say: do what you want. Special treatment superimposed onto a situation I find patronising.



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08 Jan 2012, 4:20 pm

TruthTree wrote:
Moog wrote:
Perhaps you could arrange some kind of signal system with the aspie or aspies in your life? Signs on a door perhaps

Funny you should suggest that.
Once I made him a paper sign that said "can't talk to you right now" and asked him to put it up when he was overloaded, but it didn't work.
Maybe I didn't approach it correctly.


It would need to be something that your aspie sees the value in using, then prompting until it becomes something in habitual use.


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ghostar
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10 Jan 2012, 11:18 am

TruthTree wrote:
Question for Aspies please.

How can I tell the difference between:
a) When an AS person overloaded and needs to be left alone
b) When the AS person won't speak to me because he is angry with me?

Also, if the AS person is angry with me should I try to leave them alone or should I try to talk to him about it?


When I am overloaded, my typically cheerful demeanor becomes very dark and irritable. Things that I normally love, i suddenly hate.

When i am angry with someone, I usually tell them. Since I can't tell when someone is angry, I never assume others can tell when I am angry.



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14 Jan 2012, 12:19 am

TruthTree wrote:
Question for Aspies please.

How can I tell the difference between:
a) When an AS person overloaded and needs to be left alone
b) When the AS person won't speak to me because he is angry with me?

Also, if the AS person is angry with me should I try to leave them alone or should I try to talk to him about it?


I appear kind of shell-shocked when I'm overloaded. Less responsive and a bit absent-minded, but at the same time panicky and trembling. Sometimes I hyperventilate. Sometimes I make clumsy, abrupt movements when I reach for a tissue (blowing my nose often helps me to stop hyperventilating) or compulsively adjust my glasses.

When I'm angry at someone, I try to avoid all contact with them. Permanently if possible. But in case they are sitting right next to me and I can't easily get away, I just sulk and have an argument with them in my head. I can't handle confrontations, so I just imagine the things I would say if I'd dare to open my mouth. Weird, I know. The difference between both situations is that I'm not agitated or panicking when I'm angry and appear more at ease, just really quiet and thoughtful.



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14 Jan 2012, 12:26 am

Question for nts

What do you do in your spare time?



Mysty
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14 Jan 2012, 4:39 pm

ghostar wrote:
TruthTree wrote:
Question for Aspies please.

How can I tell the difference between:
a) When an AS person overloaded and needs to be left alone
b) When the AS person won't speak to me because he is angry with me?

Also, if the AS person is angry with me should I try to leave them alone or should I try to talk to him about it?


When I am overloaded, my typically cheerful demeanor becomes very dark and irritable. Things that I normally love, i suddenly hate.

When i am angry with someone, I usually tell them. Since I can't tell when someone is angry, I never assume others can tell when I am angry.


Seems to me there's not a need to. Either way, give them space. If someone is angry, wait till they are ready to talk about it.


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19 Jan 2012, 8:32 pm

TruthTree wrote:
Question for Aspies please.

How can I tell the difference between:
a) When an AS person overloaded and needs to be left alone
b) When the AS person won't speak to me because he is angry with me?

Also, if the AS person is angry with me should I try to leave them alone or should I try to talk to him about it?


In my experience, NTs can't read my body signals any better than I can read theirs. So how would an NT tell the difference? By asking a direct question. And with me, it would by far be more likely to that I was overloaded than angry. I've rarely been angry with anyone, and when I have been I usually let them know it. I still get overloaded all the time, especially by crowds.



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19 Jan 2012, 9:08 pm

Question for NTs

Do you complain that Aspie's never admit that they are wrong?

My ex-wife and stepdaughter were what I would classify as alpha NTs.  For example, stepD was student council president in high school. During our marriage, a common complaint from them about me was that I would "never admit that I was wrong." This confused me for years. I would readily admit an error whenever shown proof.  Eventually, I made a serious effort to identify what was going on.  Finally, I discovered that it was my opinions that were "wrong." For example, I like classical music but not pop. That was "wrong" since they liked pop music. How could I not like it? 
This has bugged me ever since. How many people treat opinions and facts the same? How can an opinion be wrong?



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20 Jan 2012, 6:54 pm

jamieevren1210 wrote:
Question for nts

What do you do in your spare time?


I like to garden. When the weather is too cold and all my plants are hibernating I plan out what I will do the following Spring and also compost (which can be done any time of year) and have seedlings indoors.



Abbadackerygirl
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21 Jan 2012, 12:47 am

TruthTree wrote:
Question for Aspies please.

How can I tell the difference between:
a) When an AS person overloaded and needs to be left alone
b) When the AS person won't speak to me because he is angry with me?

Also, if the AS person is angry with me should I try to leave them alone or should I try to talk to him about it?


When I am overloaded, I want to be left completely alone. No interaction with anyone. If I was mad at you, I would call someone else and complain about you, lol.
Although I have to say, the two can go hand in hand. You may have made me so mad that I am now on overload, grr!