Does anyone feel like they have two personalities?

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Most of the time, I'm very sweet and Mick Avory-like.

I take on more of a leader persona at work, separating my work life and my home life. I put on the mask and act of Ray Davies, not showing any emotion or sensitivity when I'm racing around the parking lots, picking up litter and quickly digging up cans out of the trash cans.

I like my real personality a lot better. The sweet, sensitive Mick Avory twin.

My personality constantly changes. It changes on which friend I'm hanging out with, if I'm at home, when I'm at work and when I'm out in public. Yes, I have many quirks that I try and control when I'm in punlic to seem "normal."

Yes, even though I don't like her very much, when I'm in social situations rather than seem like a shy girl who can't make friends I morph into a cold girl who simply doesn't want friends. I don't like her and I'm trying my best to make sure she doesn't come out, especially because I can't keep her up for long and tend to end up shutting down.

I find this subject fascinating - the idea of masks is an interesting one, and also the fact that some people don't actually like the 'social NT persona' they adopt. I wonder if I should have used the word persona instead of personalities?

I have a 'social' face that I present to the world when needs must - eg for work. I literally just act the part as best I can. I definitely think of it as playing a role - that of a person who is generally acceptable to others and doesn't attract attention.

I assume that many people adopt a persona for work - I guess that's just how it is. What really interests me is the conflict or stress this causes for people with ASDs, and the impact it has on them.

Yes I do, but it's just like acting.

Real me - only shown to close friends and family, or when I have no energy to act. Also comes out when I've been around people that make me uncomfortable for extended periods of time with no escape (e.g. on uni field trips) and I can't take being public me any more.

Public me - I discovered this persona after drinking alcohol about 6 years ago and found a way to emulate it. I just act really relaxed and confident, but that's all it is, an act. If I need to do eye contact I just wear sunglasses, and I find wearing shielding clothes like hats/hoods helps. According to people I've heard, I just seem like an eccentric stoner. This works 90% of the time, but falls apart if I'm having a bad day, low on energy, hungry, too hot/cold, or have to deal with a phobia (most of my phobias are related to every day things) or sensory issues. Public me is loud and eccentric like Matt Preston, the Australian celebrity chef. I just emulate him and it's easy, but if I do it all the time it's very draining.

I do have to say, public and real me are similar and only different in the way I act towards people. If someone's talking about something really boring, or someone I don't want to talk to talks to me, then public me steps in and acts friendly by listening and smiling, even though that's not what I want to do.

When I go out, I naturally become this different person. It just comes natural to me, then as soon as I get in the door, I naturally go back to being myself again. Well, I am sort of myself everywhere I go, I mean I can't change myself to the full extent, but I change just enough to be able to be considered ''normal'' and blend in.

Yep. When I first came to WP under my old name this is one of the first things I started asking about, because it's not something most experience.. I remember how happy I was to get so many replies and stories of other people's personas.

When I was a teenager, I wondered if I was a sociopath because of this. Now I see how different I am from a sociopath, but at the time I had no idea what to attribute this to.

OT but one thing I think is interesting, the actual meaning of the word "schizophrenia" means "splitting of the mind' or "splitting of the self". I think it's interesting how similar autism (and especially AS) are to schizophrenia.

Back on topic, yes, I really feel like the part of me that exists as a "person" and isn't real. It can change easily and is often heavily influenced by surroundings, television, other people.

My actual self is very disconnected from all of it and really has no desire to relate to the world.

Different underlying reasons imo.

Most people use the different faces to get something they want or to manipulate others, and it's usually still a part of them, to some extent. It's an aspect of their personality that exists somewhere within them and isn't heavily influenced by things like television, movies, literature,etc.

For me the personas are based on things that are completely random and false. Imitations of people, imitations of attitudes and beliefs that aren't even my own. It's like I wouldn't have a personality or any authentic feelings or beliefs if I didn't first take on the attitude and personality of a person who I view as "real". When I am this "real person" I can guage how they might react in different situations and act that way.

Otherwise, it's like I have no internal direction.

Donna went on to name her two public persona. Others have also done it, but I wonder if this degree of compartmentalization is more true of classical autism, and less developed in Aspeerger's.
Interesting question..

Sincerely,
Matthew

I have different personas also...not just the public and normal me, they're more like just acts. On the whole I am made up of multiple personas, all have names. I enjoy naming things.

This is exactly how I feel. There's my "persona" when I try and act NT and the real me who isolates myself from the rest of the world and is perfectly fine in doing so.

Almost everybody does this, it's hard to function in society if you don't. I don't think it's an ASD trait.

I try to be my true self at all times, although at work some people don't like it because they are uptight and generally frightened - and sometimes they are my boss

However, my true self changes unpredictably even to me, although generally speaking if I ignore my emotions I will stay the same.

My true self also changes when I (do, don't) consume sugar, food, LSD, water, sleep, etc. etc.

I used to become frustrated by some of the stuff I do, but, eh, why bother being frustrated. It's frustrating

Definitely. I think for me my Bipolar Disorder and the medications I'm taking for that have a lot to do with it. I feel the most like myself just before and at the beginning of a manic episode, before I go out of control. One of the problems is that while they help with the bipolar symptoms (somewhat), they suppress the real me.

Sometimes I remember being my old self and try to get myself into that mode. Just the other day I had one of those moments, and it seems so far away an unattainable that I've almost given up trying. That really depresses me.

The problem mainly started when I moved to a new state and my new doctor would not prescribe the medications I was on because he said they contradicted. So I live my life in a fog. I need a new doctor.

Yeah but maybe it's a bigger leap for people on the spectrum from who they really are to the social persona.
I definitely feel this a lot in my life. I find it utterly exhausting (keeping up the persona) and deeply resent having to do so.

Best, Zel.

My personality has never been very consistent. It's not so much that I have different personalities, but rather "personality swings".