Do other Aspergers have trouble letting go?

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EstimatedProphet
Snowy Owl

Joined: 15 Apr 2012
Age: 39
Gender: Male
Posts: 144
Location: Midwest, USA

18 Apr 2012, 7:28 am

lostgirl1986 wrote:

I have majorly big issues with letting go but I find that if I think of all of the bad things the person did to me, it helps me get mad at the person and it helps me let go a lot easier. I just think of what a horrible person they were and basically makes me hate them.

I do that too, but it doesn't really help me let go. It just makes it easier to deal with in the moment and maybe helps me stop thinking about it a little quicker.

Feline1982
Tufted Titmouse

Joined: 11 Apr 2012
Gender: Female
Posts: 48

18 Apr 2012, 7:46 am

I have hard time letting go, but I'm learning... I try to talk to myself and explain why should I let go. Sometimes it works and sometimes not.

Sometimes I just get obsessed and can't let go before I tell about my feelings to someone. I do this talking even though the insult was minor and shouldn't really bother. Then I just say sorry many times and explain, that I just had to say it out loud to get rid of the thought.

If someone really insults me in a bad way (which happens practicly never ), I just don't wanna have anything to do with that person...

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falonsayswoah
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

Joined: 26 Mar 2012
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Posts: 59
Location: Oregon, USA

18 Apr 2012, 3:17 pm

I don't know if I have Asperger's not but I have a really hard time letting go of people, feelings, and objects. I still hold grudges from the 6th grade and I'm a freshman in college now. With people... When they leave me I am upset about it for a long time. Actually, I'm still upset about friends I lost in middle school. I am always either too forgiving, or I can never get over something that someone did. The absence of the person and the good times we had is always hard for me to deal with, especially if they have been there for a long time. As for objects... Well... One time when I was in the 4th grade (I think) my grandma told me that she was getting a new TV. I sobbed for hours and barely slept. I hate moving or when other people move because I associate that house with them and just.. Yeah. It took a long time for me to get used to the house my grandparents moved into when I was 11 because they had lived in the same house my entire life.

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Australien
Deinonychus

Joined: 17 May 2011
Age: 42
Gender: Male
Posts: 301

19 Apr 2012, 8:04 am

I have clear memories of insults and injustices from more than 20 years ago. I might be prepared to give the perpetrators another chance, but I certainly haven't and won't forget.

StewLin
Butterfly

Joined: 20 Oct 2012
Age: 55
Gender: Male
Posts: 10

13 Jun 2015, 9:42 am

Yes, not being able to let go of past memories is my biggest obstacle to being more social. I have 2 past memories, in particular, have been holding me back and I'm just now starting to come to grips with them.

ASPartOfMe
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 25 Aug 2013
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Location: Long Island, New York

13 Jun 2015, 1:44 pm

Repetitive behavior is a core autistic trait, perseverating is a common repetitive behavior.

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olympiadis
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 20 Jun 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,849
Location: Fairview Heights Illinois

13 Jun 2015, 6:00 pm

ASPartOfMe wrote:

Repetitive behavior is a core autistic trait, perseverating is a common repetitive behavior.

I also have this, and my memories of things are also extremely clear, thus regenerating the same emotions.
I don't really understand the concept of forgiveness and I'm not sure I've ever experienced it.
It doesn't seem logical.

marcopolo1226
Emu Egg
Emu Egg

Joined: 13 Feb 2020
Gender: Male
Posts: 1

13 Feb 2020, 8:08 am

My take on it is this we take everything literally, being so its taken more personal one thing I can't stand myself is when someone engages me and asks me a question and when I give them a answer they act disengaged our uninterested thats something ive learned to let go as most people are petty in nature, but my solution is look at the person thats saying something our doing something to too you that you dont like how are they doing in there life and 9 /10 times there miserable human beings so you end up feeling sorry for them and that offended nature dispears becuse you realize it's not your fault but there's.

shortfatbalduglyman
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Mar 2017
Age: 41
Gender: Male
Posts: 10,599

13 Feb 2020, 8:33 pm

The frequency intensity duration of my grudges never ceases to amaze precious lil "people"

Sometimes I surprise myself

I used to feel self righteous and s**t

But now I want to be practical

Fictional and useful and other forms of stupid BS

Tried and failed s**t

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