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SyphonFilter
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27 Apr 2012, 8:35 pm

Steven_Tyler77 wrote:
Why they can't debate on a subject without taking it personally and without getting angry when the person they're talking to disagrees with them. Why so many of them resort to calling people stupid when they run out of logical arguments.

Why, although they don't like logical debate, they seem to thrive in the realm of interpersonal conflict. I mean, they so easily get worked up on some minor thing and stir up a whole lot of drama and conflict. I so hate this, I'm so sensitive that fighting with someone totally makes me sick.

Why the vast majority of them have absolutely no theory of mind even towards other NTs (as much as the psychologists would like us to believe that).
I too hate hearing people yell at each other. They need to calm down. Because 99.9% of the time, the argument is over some issue so petty I'm stumped as to why people would be in conflict over it.



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27 Apr 2012, 8:37 pm

I always found figure of speech to be difficult, as when I was younger I used to take figure of speech - like "pull up your socks" - literally. However, as I have grown older figure of speech has become easier to understand, but there are still some sayings I don't understand.



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28 Apr 2012, 1:56 am

SyphonFilter wrote:
Or, if you have a sibling that's younger than you, your parents don't question/supervise what they do. But anything you do, they'll demand to know every aspect of where you're going and when you'll be back. Makes me think I'm ret*d (which, deep down, I refuse to believe).

Yes, that happens to me all to often. I'm supervised much much more than my brother. And sometimes I think they think I'm too gullible, innocent and naive or something like that.


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28 Apr 2012, 2:31 am

bettalove wrote:
I'm confused by the lack of directness. For example, rather than saying "Can you take out the trash?" a NT might say "Huh. The trash is full." when they're actually hoping to get someone to take it out. I can't wrap my head around why they just wouldn't be direct with their request in the first place.


Weird, people have always asked me to empty it out or take it out and I have heard them say the same to others.



League_Girl
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28 Apr 2012, 2:39 am

SyphonFilter wrote:
Steven_Tyler77 wrote:
Why they can't debate on a subject without taking it personally and without getting angry when the person they're talking to disagrees with them. Why so many of them resort to calling people stupid when they run out of logical arguments.

Why, although they don't like logical debate, they seem to thrive in the realm of interpersonal conflict. I mean, they so easily get worked up on some minor thing and stir up a whole lot of drama and conflict. I so hate this, I'm so sensitive that fighting with someone totally makes me sick.

Why the vast majority of them have absolutely no theory of mind even towards other NTs (as much as the psychologists would like us to believe that).
I too hate hearing people yell at each other. They need to calm down. Because 99.9% of the time, the argument is over some issue so petty I'm stumped as to why people would be in conflict over it.



That's why I enjoy dramas so much. they are so fun to read even if they do irk me. Then I am wondering why am I reading all this if it's making me mad? But I just find it all so interesting and how people think. Then I get bored with it after a while because I am like "okay enough of that" because it lasts for pages and pages. But sometimes I literally forget about the whole thing so I end up not visiting that thread again.



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28 Apr 2012, 4:59 am

When a lot of women seem to think being fat is a crime, or people will ridicule them if they appear anywhere over 10 stone, in which they won't unless they are stupid kids or very immature adults who's standards are very high.


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evil_expresso
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28 Apr 2012, 5:15 am

Strong emphasis on sex.

Gossip.

Pop culture interest.

Exclusion.

Over reacting to pointless matters.

Getting into my business when clearly I'm irked.

Talking a great deal; juggling several conversations.

Talking behind one's back.

Not being direct and/or honest.

However, I get along with my NT counterparts and try not to judge them :)


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28 Apr 2012, 7:41 am

Not sure if this is a trait, but it's certainly something what seems like they have to do, and that is getting attracted by someone of the opposite sex on holiday (especially when they're young). A boy always has to have a crush on a sexy cute cocktail waitress, or a girl always has to really fancy a cute young fella at the bar - and they always manage to get talking to them too.

It just pisses me off, and this is one of the reasons why I hate being an Aspie. I've always got to spend every vacation standing looking at people flirting about and fancying eachother. Even if I try to smile and be friendly and dress up nicely, I still don't get fancied by cute fellas at the bar because of ''the vibe'' again.

If ''the vibe'' was alive, I would f*****g shoot it. I hate vibes. They are what f*****g spoil my life.


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28 Apr 2012, 5:15 pm

bettalove wrote:
I'm confused by the lack of directness. For example, rather than saying "Can you take out the trash?" a NT might say "Huh. The trash is full." when they're actually hoping to get someone to take it out. I can't wrap my head around why they just wouldn't be direct with their request in the first place.

Ah, this. The other day my mom told me to take my trash downstairs, and I did it immediately so as not to get her mad. Half an hour later she comes up to my room and asks if I'm just leaving it there for her to take out herself :oops: I keep asking her if she can be more direct with me but she never does it. I wonder sometimes if it's something she really can't help doing, just like I can't help not reading into what she wants me to do.


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Bun
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28 Apr 2012, 6:19 pm

League_Girl wrote:
SyphonFilter wrote:
Steven_Tyler77 wrote:
Why they can't debate on a subject without taking it personally and without getting angry when the person they're talking to disagrees with them. Why so many of them resort to calling people stupid when they run out of logical arguments.

Why, although they don't like logical debate, they seem to thrive in the realm of interpersonal conflict. I mean, they so easily get worked up on some minor thing and stir up a whole lot of drama and conflict. I so hate this, I'm so sensitive that fighting with someone totally makes me sick.

Why the vast majority of them have absolutely no theory of mind even towards other NTs (as much as the psychologists would like us to believe that).
I too hate hearing people yell at each other. They need to calm down. Because 99.9% of the time, the argument is over some issue so petty I'm stumped as to why people would be in conflict over it.



That's why I enjoy dramas so much. they are so fun to read even if they do irk me. Then I am wondering why am I reading all this if it's making me mad? But I just find it all so interesting and how people think. Then I get bored with it after a while because I am like "okay enough of that" because it lasts for pages and pages. But sometimes I literally forget about the whole thing so I end up not visiting that thread again.

I always loved dramas too, that's why when I used to read the papers, I'd read the section where readers write in. In some ways, I love seeing how people's minds work, and how much you can get out of someone when they're speaking about an emotive topic.


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vampresstcullen
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28 Apr 2012, 9:09 pm

StarTrekker wrote:
For me one of them is definitely when they say things like, "It's rude to interrupt people when they're talking," as if it's one of those ancient carved-in-stone things, and yet, every time they get together in groups of three or more, they're so busy talking over one another that none of them ever finishes a sentence. It makes it really hard to determine when it's okay to interrupt people mid-sentence and when it's not. I personally don't like people doing it to me ever, and I don't like doing it to others, but sometimes it's the only way to get a word in edgewise, but every time I do it, I'm so busy focusing on trying to decide if I screwed up by talking over somebody that I never hear the response to what I just said!


Yay, a thread where people pin a trait to a general demographic and complain about it! You don't think other autistics talk about what they think is rude? For the rest of the post, one idea is you could interject when you have an exciting idea, for example, related to what the person is talking about... seems like that'd be forgiven... other wise wait for a pause and be first, I guess? Then if someone else decides to speak its just that you two did it at the same time.



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28 Apr 2012, 9:12 pm

evil_expresso wrote:
Strong emphasis on sex.

Gossip.

Pop culture interest.

Exclusion.

Over reacting to pointless matters.

Getting into my business when clearly I'm irked.

Talking a great deal; juggling several conversations.

Talking behind one's back.

Not being direct and/or honest.

However, I get along with my NT counterparts and try not to judge them :)


HAHAHA... you think other autistics don't do this? omg, so many examples I just ran into TODAY in the autistic community on this post! An autistic chat I go to has been considered in such shambles once that it was called a cesspool of drama! Yes, I get it. Autism makes people so darned perfect. It is an exception to find an autistic girl or guy who is OBSESSED with sex, over reacts, gets into others business, talks about others, lies, and isn't direct or tries to be sly or cryptic. /sarcasm.



vampresstcullen
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28 Apr 2012, 9:15 pm

SyphonFilter wrote:
Joe90 wrote:
The way they get eachother's jokes but never get mine, even though I get their jokes
So true! Or, if you have a sibling that's younger than you, your parents don't question/supervise what they do. But anything you do, they'll demand to know every aspect of where you're going and when you'll be back. Makes me think I'm ret*d (which, deep down, I refuse to believe).


I don't get this post. Is it a crime to not get your jokes, anyway? When autistics complain about not getting others jokes, the NT is the villain, but when its reversed they're still the villain. I doubt the NTs you're talking about get every other NTs jokes either.



jellyhead
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29 Apr 2012, 6:01 am

Constant touching. Why are they always touching each other? Don't you need your hands for other things? Why is ok to rush up to someone and hug them? When is it NOT okay?

I tried to follow suit once and do 'normal' girly things but I just ended up kissing my nanna on the lips and weirding her out. javascript:emoticon(':oops:')



Kroni
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29 Apr 2012, 8:53 am

Bars

Why the hell do people enjoy going to bars? It's loud and smelly, and the bartender is always an as*hole, yet expects you to tip a $5 dollar beer that took him 2 seconds to pour after talking to the hotties for 20 minutes.

I could continue, and I will. The music is generic and lame, the "ambiance" consists of some cheap lights and crowds of people, and the only people that aren't ret*d drunk are the ones trying to get ret*d drunk. Some bars have dancing, which I suppose could be fun if you're into/good at that sorta thing, but a lot of the times you just wind up sitting at a table doing the same thing you'd do at your house...nothing. The women there are also slu*ty, or just there to tease drunk horny guys. (Not that this affects my decision as I am engaged. Now that I think about it, perhaps it's less an NT thing so much as a desperate singles thing.)



howzat
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29 Apr 2012, 3:21 pm

For me its fashion as they have to look the same dress the same also another one is when ever relatives say good bye they still keep on talking on and on they never stop.