Irritating AS guy on Youtube: Help!

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Dear Rascal77s, please go and read the 'moderator attention' thread in WromngPlanet.net discussion forum for proper reporting instructions. your inflammatory in-thread 'report' was pointless as it was likely to be missed by the moderators, and it was likely to incite a flame war. thank you. Sincerely, a moderator

Why not just make it so you moderate your comments? Then every comment has to be approved. Never approve his - delete them and they are gone from your channel. After his comments are not approved for x amount of time he is sure to move on.

But more than anything - just ignore him. From the sounds of him he is just annoying... there are plenty of annoying people out there. I personally don't mind annoying so much as I do derogatory or mean spirited....

I agree - you have a "fan club" you gotta put up with the good as well as the bad...

well they could block so that he cant comment but he could create another account so I really dont know what they can do but that would be your best bet.

I wanted to respond to several comments here but decided to just respond to the OP.

First, I think you need to find out his personal situation before you can judge him. He might be looking for a girl with his interests who is an Aspie, but be frustrated because he can't find any. I think this is the most likely scenario. If that's the case, I think that the best solution would be to not block him outright, but tell him that the frequency of his comments is inappropriate and, as you have tried to explain, they just aren't interested.

I think you are scared of another [edit: name removed by moderator] scenario. However, this guy's interests and motives seem a lot more healthy and intelligent, unlike with [edit: name removed by moderator]. I spoke to his mom yesterday and she said that he's just not right in the head right now. He is clearly fixated on drugs, crime, video games, and girls who have at least some interest in his interests.

So I think that the girls should try to convey to him directly as to what their interests are. However, I think the aspie community thing is legitimate and I don't see why they can't give it a shot. His tendency to leave comments might be obsessive but it might also be a routine, as well as a desperate attempt to initiate conversation without really knowing how. Stalking is a common thing with AS and is often not intentional but unfortunately ends up resulting from a lack of companionship as well as fixation on people, which is not necessarily sexual but is more of a style of interacting. If your friend wants others to understand her people fixations, she should give the same understanding to someone who tries to interact with her in a similar way.

P.S. I've looked at the channel of who I think you're talking about and I couldn't find any comments along the lines of what you have mentioned. So now I'm really confused as to who this is.

there's nought so queer as folk

Sounds like stalking to me. I would keep blocking and keep on blocking him if he keeps on contacting me. That is what I would do if I were them. They could start being nasty to him hoping he will leave them alone because "they are so mean" to him but he may not get the hint or not care because he is too obsessed with them. I have tried it with my online stalker I had and he still kept on coming and play the victim and act like he is doing nothing wrong. Plus he would also gaslight. Does it need to be done with intent for it to be gas lighting? What if someone was not aware of their behavior so they truly thought they were victim so they act like the person is the bad guy, not them. Would it still be gaslighting?


Cathy and Megan may have to disable their youtube comments. I would also just keep deleting the messages if they were off topic, I see it as spam.

I really appreciate everyone's input here as it has given me some insight on how to possibly deal with similar situations in the future if one arises...which I know they will as I am someone who works directly with people on the spectrum.

As suspected, he has good intentions, but poor communication skills. The trick is to break appropriate and inappropriate social behaviours down as much as possible, as well as clearly state how people feel, what people expect of him when he comments, and potential consequences for not doing so (people will become frustrated or you will be banned). He is finally understanding how they feel about his comments, and now he has promised to make less of them, directing his focus on other videos of interest.

Like most people I know on the spectrum I know, he approaches social situations on a purely logical basis. He has questioned why a particular commenter also commented on Cathy's video in Spanish, accompanied by a translation, but he couldn't do so for one of the languages he was interested in. I told him that this is sort of like a "test" to see if the person in the video might find this intriguing. I've established a rule for him: if the person in the video does not directly respond to your interest (i.e. leaves a comment that says: I think it's neat that you speak Spanish) that this person is not someone you talk about this interest with.

As her mentor, I have also coached Cathy on how to handle this situation if it ever becomes problematic for her again. I know that she gets frustrated easily with others who are more impaired than her, as she has difficulty understanding other's intentions. I broke down the reasons for his behaviour and the things she can do to redirect him without getting frustrated or being too vague that he won't understand her.

I have also sent Megan a PM about the guy and explained the situation. She is having a bit of trouble handling him, so I have offered to help her out.

Mathgirl: I was worried originally at first about the guy possibly having similar tendencies as [edit: name removed by moderator], but upon breaking down the situation with him and these girls with him in detail, I was able to get a better sense of what his true motivations are. I now feel very comfortable coaching him with through this situation, as well as other ones that may arise for him.

Exploit him for money

^ My intentions were not to exclude him at all...if I wanted to exclude him, I would have gone the easy way out and simply blocked him.

Rather, my intention is him to become better integrated with these girls so that they come to a middle ground where they are more accepting of him. I intervened because I care about Cathy and want to teach her how to be more tolerant and accepting of the people she attracts to her channel. I don't think she necessarily understands that if she's going to talk about subjects like AS that she is going to have people with a wide range of social abilities watching and commenting.

Cathy in particular doesn't seem to be really accepting of people who have different personalities or more difficulties than her. She is all about image and tends to gravitate towards people who look or act a certain way, rather than identify and empathise with the difficulties that a person has. She struggles a lot socially herself, so perhaps she has trouble generalizing and comparing their experiences with her own.

She looks up to me a great deal because I've worked on and have been met with a lot of social success despite having ASD, but she needs to realize that if she truly wants to connect with others with ASD, she has to be more tolerant of their difficulties. This is why I am trying to get her involved in the ASD community and get her exposed to more people with it.

Troll or not, I agree with this post, somewhat. I believe most computers these days have scroll bars, and even touch screens can be swiped to scroll down, thus making it incredibly easy to simply skim past anything you don't have the time or energy to read - surely much easier than presuming to correct someone's behaviour.