Avoidant Personality - Anyone else?

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I apparently have many aspects of this, notably 1 and 6, the others to lesser degrees.

1 - Be easily hurt when people criticize or disapprove of them
2 - Hold back too much in intimate relationships
3 - Be reluctant to become involved with people
4 - Avoid activities or jobs that involve contact with others
5 - Be shy in social situations out of fear of doing something wrong
6 - Make potential difficulties seem worse than they are
7 - Hold the view they are not good socially, not as good as other people, or unappealing

Yeah, I display all of those, except number 2. I give relationships everything I have and end up hurt in the end. But other than that, all of them describe me extremely well.

me too

Yes, i show those symptoms, but not diagnosed.

I took the MMPI last week, and took another test today (Axis II?) because the psychologist believes I may have avoidant personality disorder, and this is the first list of symptoms I have seen... and I see myself in most of them.

I am going through the process because I suspected Aspergers, but she says I don't have enough Aspergers traits to be diagnosed. I was almost disappointed, since I thought I fit... but at least I am potentially getting to the root of some issues in my life.

Oh yes, I have all of those.

My partner thinks I have aspie traits not because of
AS, but because I was nurtured into Avoidant Personality by my very quiet single mother and never had a "daddy" figure in my life.

I have to say I have become much more outgoing since I went to Uni and started living.
Had a 20 year time penalty so I'll never completely catch up, but at least I can pass as normal now.

I show those signs. The psych that did my eval in the airforce mentioned avoidant PD, schizoid PD and AS as possible reasons for some of my issues.

I have AvPD and fit most of those criteria except No. 2. It's been a while since I've been in a relationship, but when I did, I was pretty open. Perhaps too open, and that's probably where my aspieness kicked in.

I have all the traits listed, but I'm not sure if I'd say I have #2 as well...I've never been in an intimate relationship before, nor do I ever want to be. Although I'm sure I would have trait #2, if I was in an intimate relationship.

Wow, it's like you're describing my personality on the whole here!

Yes, and I tend to have a fear of criticism, and I get really upset or angry when people point out my quirks to me.


I don't mind having a relationship, but it's all the texting or ringing that I get fed up with sometimes. Also, I want to find the man what's right for me, not the first man that comes along just for the sake of having a man.


I want to become involved with friends, but not with strangers who I won't see any more. Like if I go away on holiday, I don't see the point in making friends abroad and becoming too involved. Mild friendliness like saying hello and having a bit of small talk is as far as I like to go.


I was looking for retail work, but after several experiences of dealing with customers through voluntary work, I found it rather overwhelming. So now I am just looking for work that goes no further than contact with colleagues.


I am shy nearly everywhere I go, for that exact reason. At my last voluntary job, I made myself out to be a confident person, and I may of fitted in a bit more and made friends, but I did do a lot of things wrong and even had a few tears from too much bitchiness from other people because of me saying something at the wrong time, so now at my new voluntary job I'm at now, I have made out to be a much quieter person than I would of been, because of the fear I have developed of saying or doing something wrong and being shamed for it. But now I believe I am a bit too quiet, so last week I tried to make conversation a bit more - but was set back a bit because people there now assume that I'm quiet and so they don't expect me to talk and so don't listen out for me, so I didn't get heard anyway.


I do feel I make excuses, probably due to anxiety. Like with jobs, I go, ''oh that would be too bloke-ish for me'', ''oh the environment sounds very bitchy there'', ''nah, that sounds like too much heavy-lifting'', ''hmm, that place doesn't sound like it's going to last so I'd best not come all off job-seekers to start in an insecure job'', ''too many hours'', ''not enough hours'', ''too far, I don't want to have to get 2 buses'', ''the pay doesn't sound good''.....and the list goes on. But this is NOT due to laziness, it's due to anxiety and paranoia.


Yep - this is me. I feel I am not good enough for anyone, that people are going to notice something off about me sooner or later and not want to be friends any more, that my cousins are all better than me because they're NTs, and when I hear somebody saying about a favour somebody had done for them I think ''huh, I bet nobody would do that for me''. Also I have the ''the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence'' attitude, where no matter what I've got, somebody else has it better than me. I can't seem to spot any good points about me and my life, even though there probably are lots, I focus too much on the bad things about myself and the good things about other people. I also find I become so jealous of other people for having better social skills than I do, and I beat myself up inside a lot too.

Except for point 2 and point 3, to some extent, this is me. Without being diagnosed, I know I have an avoidant personality. There are so many things in my past that I've pulled out of, due to social anxiety, that I don't need anyone to tell me that I have avoidant personality disorder. I'm fine with a friend or two or even a stranger, although I used to have issues with avoiding fairly close friends too. There are so many other situations that I'll just avoid, e.g. making a simple phonecall, applying for that dream job or doing my honours year at uni. I know people who take medication, to enable them to get on with their lives. I've never even spoken to my doc about it and I've not lived up to my own and others' expectations, because of it.

I have all of these. Except for 2, which doesn't apply to me because I've never been in an intimate relationship.

Asperger's and AvPD. If there's ever a recipe to guarantee lifelong virginity, this is it.

I'm an avoidant, and I have all seven of the listed traits to one extent or another. It doesn't surprise me that aspies share the avoidant traits; it's one of the reasons I feel comfortable on this forum (I'm not autistic myself).

Apparently i have avoidents personality disorder but i have been told so much i dont want to say i agree or dont agree.
but i will say this its the closet anyones came to my actions and personality before.

I can say yes to a lot of those—to some extent, anyway. I don't know about #2 since I've never been in an intimate relationship, though. With #3, I don't really approach people I don't know, but I'm fine around people I do know as far as that goes. #4 is a problem at times, but other times, it isn't much of an issue; it depends on my mood. As for #5, it depends on who I'm around.

EDIT: Apparently Avoidant Personality Disorder manifests itself in early adulthood:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Avoidant_p ... y_disorder

I've experienced these sort of issues when I was a child too, so it's hard to say.

I'm 3,4,6, and 7 to a very high degree...number 3, especially, since I don't like becoming involved with a whole lot of people.