New plan: deliberate selective mutism

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Joined: 20 Jul 2012
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09 Oct 2012, 5:20 pm

Recently, I have become so, so tired of interacting with the worthless, idiotic vermin from my school that I've decided that from now onwards, I will only talk to those I've deemed worthy of interacting with me. I spend the majority of my day in silence anyway, so all I'll be doing is not responding on the rare occasion that those repulsive creatures attempt to interact with me. I can't believe I've never thought of this before!

People have had long enough to at least try be nice to me and now, they've missed their one and only chance. I've already began compiling my list of undesirables.

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emimeni
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09 Oct 2012, 6:00 pm

I felt the same way when I was your age, only I didn't even have the energy for the people who were nice to me. You don't need to be polite to people who are rude, or even disrespectful towards you.

You seem like you have dehumanized them, though. Like, they're an undesirable instead of human. I know you'll neever heal completely, but maybe you'll heal enough that you'll think of them as human bullies, instead of repulsive creatures.

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Davinel
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09 Oct 2012, 6:06 pm

Heh, when I was in school I was like "STOP TALKING TO ME!!" and preferably stop talking at all. And even more preferable - stop existing.

And now I'm like "someone talk to me please..."

Curiotical
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09 Oct 2012, 6:15 pm

emimeni wrote:

You seem like you have dehumanized them, though. Like, they're an undesirable instead of human. I know you'll neever heal completely, but maybe you'll heal enough that you'll think of them as human bullies, instead of repulsive creatures.

You're right, I have dehumanized them because I don't believe that those who deliberately antagonise innocent people don't deserve to be regarded as true humans.

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09 Oct 2012, 6:42 pm

Curiotical wrote:

You're right, I have dehumanized them because I don't believe that those who deliberately antagonise innocent people don't deserve to be regarded as true humans.

They are human though, same as you. Deal with it.

chris5000
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09 Oct 2012, 7:07 pm

I did the same thing a week after I got put in special education. I talked to no one at that school.

emimeni
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09 Oct 2012, 11:01 pm

Davinel wrote:

They are human though, same as you. Deal with it.

I agree, though I wouldn't be as blunt as Davinel. Part of the healing from the bullying is acknowledging the fact that your bullys' are human, as are you and humans' can do terrible, terrible things to others, as can you. What makes you better than those who are bullying you is that you are resisting the temptation to, for example, bash their head into the wall, but they aren't resisting the temptation to be a total jack***.

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thewhitrbbit
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09 Oct 2012, 11:07 pm

Aspie God complex much?

emimeni
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09 Oct 2012, 11:53 pm

thewhitrbbit wrote:

Aspie God complex much?

I would apply "Aspie God complex" to adults who know better, not to an upset, bullied 14 year old.

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AliceInAspieland
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10 Oct 2012, 2:07 am

emimeni wrote:

thewhitrbbit wrote:

Aspie God complex much?

I would apply "Aspie God complex" to adults who know better, not to an upset, bullied 14 year old.

I agree. Everyone on this site has probably been bullied at some point. It can be terribly upsetting. We use whatever skills or ways of coping we can to get by. If this is how Curiotical deals with it, then let him have it. Not coping with it could be far worse and cause more problems. For instance anger as opposed to isolation could result in violence.

Curiotical - Dehumanising them isn't mature way to think about the situation. I understand where you're coming from. But in the long run feeling this way won't help you make friends with the people you want to. While it seems logical to you, NT's tend to find this sort of attitude concerning. It's unsettling to them.

Perhaps you could think about them as being humans who will undoubted miss out on a full and true experience of life. By being judgemental and closed minded, they are missing out on lots of wonderful things. By bullying you and making you feel bad, they are concentrating on hateful and negative thoughts and actions. If I had a choice I wouldn't want a life dominated by those sorts of things. Ignoring them is the way to go, I agree.

Also with the list, be careful. Make sure it can only be interpreted as a list of people you aren't going to talk to. I don't think High Schools would react well to a hate list. It could look a little Columbine. Which definitely wouldn't help your situation.

Curiotical
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10 Oct 2012, 10:27 am

thewhitrbbit wrote:

Aspie God complex much?

Your characterisation of my attitude as an "Aspie God complex is entirely flawed. The term "Aspie God complex" would only be applicable if I harboured an outright hatred of all Neurotypicals. I didn't say that, nor did I imply it.

emimeni wrote:

I would apply "Aspie God complex" to adults who know better, not to an upset, bullied 14 year old.

Thank you for trying to stand up for me, but at the same time, please don't patronize me. I was reasonably calm when I started this thread, and as a mature fourteen year old, I am entirely accountable for my actions and opinions.

AliceInAspieland wrote:

But in the long run feeling this way won't help you make friends with the people you want to. While it seems logical to you, NT's tend to find this sort of attitude concerning. It's unsettling to them.

I understand where you're coming from, but I already have friends from my Aspie social group. I'm perfectly happy with the small social life I have. I really couldn't care less about how unsettling I am to my classmates anymore. If they want to be nice to me or befriend me, then obviously, they are welcome to do so; but the vast majority are nothing more than garbage in my eyes.

Anyway, the "deliberate selective mutism" thing worked out very well for me today! The ID's (irrelevant douchebags) didn't receive their satisfaction, and my day was much less stressful without the unwanted social interaction.

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10 Oct 2012, 11:22 am

Curiotical wrote:

If your having a tough time, right down and remember ever significant offense that you can remember. When you get about my age 25, just mention it when you run into those people.

The guilt trip you can put people on is amazing.

To crush a 14 year old is relatively easy, to crush an adult is power. :lol:

knowbody15
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10 Oct 2012, 1:11 pm

Curiotical wrote:

emimeni wrote:

You're right, I have dehumanized them because I don't believe that those who deliberately antagonise innocent people don't deserve to be regarded as true humans.

They probably make you feel so low, that the only way you can deal with it, is to make them even lower in your mind. So, in your mind, if you're making them subhuman, then they're making you feel pretty much almost subhuman...the thing to do is raise yourself up a few notches, don't let them make you feel so low.

They're human. Their behavior is a distinct human characteristic. Their shittiness is partly what makes them human, and if they can overcome that and grow and learn, that would be another distinctly human quality. You guys are young, trying to make your way through the often times cruel world, especially for 14 year olds. You guys have it rough, no doubt. Those kids have issues. They treat you that way, because someone else treated them that way, or they feel pressure by other kids, or simply haven't developed their moral compass....

If you were my kid, and I heard that some other kids were picking on you, I'd want to smash them, I want to smash them now, but someone's gotta be on the good side of things, and it might as well be us. If those kids dont learn, they'll suffer in life....let 'em. For you, take the high road and set yourself up for a decent life where you can handle your business, and maybe one day, this stuff will slide off your back. It's about your happiness, not their pain....

hang in there dude, I know how that anger feels, it burns, hits you from all different angles....

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emimeni
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10 Oct 2012, 2:02 pm

Sorry for seeming patronizing.

Looking at them like they're garbage isn't very mature of you, though.

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Curiotical
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10 Oct 2012, 2:51 pm

emimeni wrote:

Sorry for seeming patronizing.

That's okay. It is understandable, given that young people on the spectrum are often naive, and Neurotypical young people can be ludicrously immature.

emimeni wrote:

Looking at them like they're garbage isn't very mature of you, though.

I still have to disagree with you on that point. I'd say it's a perfectly reasonable reaction.

_______________________________________________________________________________

ATTENTION

This thread wasn't started to discuss my opinion of them. It was started for the purpose of discussing my method of "blanking" them in order to reduce social interaction with them. Please use this thread for it's intended purpose.

~Curiotical~

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10 Oct 2012, 3:52 pm

Curiotical wrote:

I really couldn't care less[emphasis added] about how unsettling I am to my classmates anymore.

Thread hijack: Thank you so much for using this phrase correctly instead of saying the cringe-worthy "could care less." :thumright:

As to your topic: I already do this. It's great, but everyone thinks I'm weird and/or rude. Of course, they did already, so...

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