Board index › General Discussion › General Autism Discussion

Cannot tell if people TRULY like me

Page 2 of 2 [ 22 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2

Previous topic | Next topic

krex
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 20 Jun 2006
Age: 61
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 4,471
Location: Minnesota

13 Mar 2007, 1:24 pm

Whether here or at work...I think I annoy people with enough time.Sometimes it bothers me and sometimes it doesnt.What it does,is often suprise me....people can seem so nice but they never reach out for more of a friendship,and sometimes it is a relief.....it would just take time away from doing the things I enjoy which are solo activities or it would become complicated with feelings/drama.Most the time I dont know if I like someone or not either.I think I like anyone who isnt mean.If they are nice to others,they get bonus points...if they are funny and intelligent.....wow.Thats pretty rare,though.

The manager also seems very annoyed by me.She seems in a constant state of agitation no matter how hard I work.It's a lot like being around my mom growing up.I just try and avoid her as much as possible.I think she has her own psych problems,so I try and not take it personal,I have even considered she maybe aspie and doesnt realize all her "angry faces".People are weird.


I hope people at work like me,they are fellow animal lovers ,so I think they are more tollerant of "weirdness" and tend to be more caretaking in nature.I would never make it in the corporate world....they would eat me alive.


_________________
Just because one plane is flying out of formation, doesn't mean the formation is on course....R.D.Lang

Visit my wool sculpture blog
http://eyesoftime.blogspot.com/


ljoon
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 11 Mar 2007
Gender: Female
Posts: 53

13 Mar 2007, 6:27 pm

I can really identify with this. I feel like I have made a strong connection with a person and I assume the feeling is mutual, but then the person slowly starts to distance themselves from me without an explanation. I never have a clue of what I am doing to push them away. In return I become even more reserved because I don't want to annoy them.



calandale
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 9 Mar 2007
Gender: Male
Posts: 12,439

13 Mar 2007, 9:49 pm

I have this happen when I think that it is impossible. Somehow, I let them know that I'm not interested in them any longer, without trying to.



rhonda70
Emu Egg
Emu Egg

User avatar

Joined: 12 Mar 2007
Gender: Female
Posts: 3

13 Mar 2007, 11:07 pm

I can relate. I used to ask people over and over if they liked me. And I would ask other people if they thought people liked me, over and over. Now I don't but I still can't feel it. It's very frustrating and I don't know what the answer is. :(



calandale
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 9 Mar 2007
Gender: Male
Posts: 12,439

13 Mar 2007, 11:08 pm

Only a real jerk (like me) is going to say something like no to a question like that. I can see my wife answering that - she'd be worse than I would.



new_guy_64
Pileated woodpecker
Pileated woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 1 Mar 2007
Gender: Male
Posts: 178
Location: My own world.

13 Mar 2007, 11:25 pm

Vegasadelphia wrote:
I assumed it was an Aspie trait or at least related. Here was the situation that made me re-asses this notion.

Coworker and I are talking, I cannot read her at all, cannot figure her out. One minute she says "thats hilarious, you are funny" but the next she ignores me when I walk by. Cute girl, big brown eyes, soft spoken, very nice. She smiles and laughs one minute, the gives me a funny look the next and acts like I shouldnt be talking to her.

I rented a movie, and wanted to watch it with family, but my brother in law says he can't watch it with me because he wants to make out with my sister while the movie is on. Clearly a lie. So I ask my sister whats up, and she says he can't stand watching movies with me if I have seen the movie before because i get all excited right before the good parts. HE is the one that asked me to rent the movie so everyone could watch!

I had a friend who I worked with for months, and we got kind of close, talked more about personal stuff than work stuff, and the day she left the company, she stopped talking to me (email, phone, etc). She was even the one who said "we will stay in touch after I leave", I never said it, but then she just cuts me off. So lately I feel like this will happen with all coworkers, family, friends, etc.



I can't empathize very often but I can definitely imagine being in your shoes. A lot of people at church are nice and I'm accepted there, but I still get a lot of mixed messages from them. I'm usually left thinking if they like me or if they can't stand my presence.