How are you supposed to react to "banter", insults

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Hey, I'm Dan, good to meet y'all, this is my first time posting on this forum.
I've been browsing around on here for maybe a year now, you seem like a nice bunch, I hope I can benefit the forum and we can all learn from and appreciate each other.

Sorry to start on a bad note, but today's been a s**t day.

I find it really hard to deal with "banter" (which is basically teasing, mocking etc.). In choir today my peers found it "banterous" to take drum sticks and hit me on the shoulder, the back, the groin, etc.. When I took a stick from my peer the guy who's sticks they were said "this is theft. I gave the sticks to them, not to you. give it back". A weird story to start off here but that's what happened. This kind of thing happens literally every rehearsal. Sometimes it's making my phone ring in the middle of the rehearsal, sometimes it's squirting water down the back of my neck. The funny thing is, honestly, it's just me, every time (at least in my row). The other people in my row are left alone.

In maths I got called stupid to my face, and when I tried to justify myself by comparing grades with the person who said it, he said "IT'S NOT A COMPETITION" really loudly so the whole class turned round and I looked like a dick.

Then when I went to ask two other players (I'm in a music school) about when the rehearsal was one was like "it's not on. Jokes it's at 7:30." Then the other guy called me a bender. I later found out there actually was no rehearsal, when I called another player and he said "there's no rehearsal. go away" and hung up.

Then at dinner, one of the people there said that she listened to my remix, which spurted a whole conversation about it. It's a dubstep remix, and apparently the guy sitting next to me listened to it four times "just for the comedy" of it because "there was no drop". Then they said I should do something else because making it was a waste of time (it took me nearly 50 hours to make). Later on in the conversation, I said "I know why you two are friends, it's cuz you're both really touchy and flirty" (this girl is quite a good friend of mine) and she literally threw a fork in my face. Luckily it mostly missed and I wasn't hurt. Then everyone stood up and left. On the way out she was like "sorrry" and gave me a massive hug. She asked me whether I was still pissed off, and I tried to explain why I was in fact still pissed off. She just blew me off and said "If you can't forgive me, I'm not wasting time on you. Your remix is s**t." then she flipped me off and walked away.

So, that was my day so far.

Let me know what you think please... Sorry about the long post.

-Dan

That doesn't sound like "banter". That sounds like harassment and bullying. You need to keep a written record of what's going on in a "bully book". If it's legal to record people without their permission in your area, wire yourself with a hidden mic or camera so there's no dispute on what's going on. After you gather enough evidence to prove that this is a consistent thing, turn everything into a higher-up in your school. Legally, they have to do something--unfortunately, this doesn't mean they will. If they don't, go above them in the hierarchy (so, for example, school counselor, then vice principal, then principal, then an assistant administrator, then administrator, then the board of directors).

I think that, legality issues aside... you should kidnap them and torture them to death slowly... making sure they cry for mercy before being explicitly sure not to show them any. Slow dismemberment while they're still alive is highly advised in order to achieve maximum catharsis. If you go so far as to hang them upside-down in your basement from flesh-hooks for a few days (or weeks), that probably means their pain has become your obsession, and you've gone a little bit too far.

That said, the legality issues are rather significant.... as they lead to a swift end to the frivolity, followed by being told you have a real purdy face and then made to squeal like a piggy... (i.e. buttrape without lube).

ERGO... due to unfortunate circumstances, attempting to do justice by torturing those responsible to death will NOT work out in your favour (such a shame)...


... Now contemplating whether to give you better advice or not. You said "y'all", and admitted to listening to dubstep, which pretty much sticks you on my contempt list under any other circumstances. BUT what bizarre language quirks you have and sh!tty music you listen to are your own business, I suppose.
Long story short, they're going to give you grief because you're different... and you can't stop them, because people are douchebags.
SO.... you have to find legitimate ways to retaliate (without legal repercussion). And remember, there is no such thing as overkill.
Learning not to give a toss about their criticism helps too. Don't feed the trolls and all that.
Make their lives HELL to the best of your ability... at least until they stop, if they ever do.
... Just do anything besides sitting there and taking it like a b!tch.

haha, okay, well... thanks for the responses, I guess. It looks like you both took time to respond, and I appreciate that. Well, I think that taking it higher up would be perceived as a really bitchy thing to do and bring me down in the eyes of a lot of people. The idea of retaliating sounds good, although last time I did that I started a war and ended up unknowingly sleeping on someone else's condom; not a very pleasant experience. And, to the last poster.. I don't actually say "y'all" in real life, I just think it's a funny thing to say online. And there we go, another person telling me I listen to (ergo "make") s**t music. Nice.
any ideas for retaliation techniques? Or should I just laugh it off? I think it's harder to take for aspergers people because we can be more sensitive than most.

i hate banter - its usually another way of saying abuse

typically people are worried about "social identity" and will consider appearance based arguments as gospel. They will also use social alliances against you if you dont have any of your own.

they do it to "get a rise" out of you or just to make themselves look and or feel better

these people sound very disturbing.

they dont respect you because thats easier than understanding.

Behind banter is a friendly intention. But behind what you described is malice. As someone said earlier, I think it's harrassment and bullying. Not well-intended at all. (I don't even like banter, even if it is done in a truly friendly way.) And that woman you called a friend doesn't sound like a real friend.

As someone suggested, you could report it to school because harrassment should be taken seriously - with punishment on the offenders, or resort to more sneaky revenge (serious enough to scare them off). You shouldn't try to be "nice" to them because that will only make them think they can do any horrible thing to you. You need to show them that you will make them pay if they treat you wrongly. You really shouldn't have to deal with such people.

hmm okay, well thanks for the responses.. I'm not too sure about the whole "bite me" thing though.. Seems like I'm just going to have to laugh it off/ ignore it for now. I'll let "you all" know if I get back at them