Anyone ever get back at their bullies?

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let's just say that what some may do to their graves won't pass for flowers.

Gotten back at bullies several times. One of the more recent was when someone tried to get me fired for essentially being autistic. She's a person of import, but as far as getting rid of this building's people is concerned, she has no power. And clearly she dosen't read a great deal, or she'd know the rules better.
I wrote a letter to address to the next board meeting, and poked holes through almost every one of her accusations. What's more, I received a wealth of support from almost every corner, sending in letters of their own; the person who accused me is not well-liked by many.
I kept my job, received an apology from the board on the spot, and the bully in question didn't dare show her face at a board meeting until over a year later.

Well said, Auntblabby (long time, no chat... I haven't logged on for a long time... I hope you have a survivable Bah-Humbug Day tomorrow).

As Aspies, we have strong trust issues and always remember those episodes of mistreatment far longer than even an elephant remembers. In many cases, I don't think that such atonement is even possible. I have a saying that reflects on this:

Lose my respect and with a sincere heart you can get it back.
Lose my trust and it is gone forever.

Bullies don't have the courage or mentality to atone... it is alien to their way of life. They are all about power, domination and control over other people. Atonement would place them in a submissive position having to face themselves in the mirror, which is what they are trying to avoid to begin with through their own bullying behavior. They are like the ostrich with its head buried in the sand.

I had an immediate supervisor one time in the early 1980s who did something like that when he had no power to do so. He was a good guy otherwise. Jerry was an alcoholic and one night when we were all drunk he began systematically abusing each of his subordinates one after another, telling each of them that they were fired when they said something that he disagreed with. He fired everybody at the table as they each got up and left in disgust. In the end he was left sitting alone with Scotty, the dwarf supervisor of another site who always had a lot of spunk and sense of justice. Scotty ripped into Jerry with a vengeance, telling him, "don't you EVER let me see you treating your people like that again". So the next day the story went out that Jerry had fired all of his subordinates and then Scotty fired Jerry.

I agree. That would only hurt the bully's family. I could never have done that to the grieving family no matter what I thought of the deceased.


It was the same for me; I was petrified of some of them, while indifferent to others when they left me alone.
I had one revenge fantasy that I played out in my mind a few times (nothing realistic, I had superpowers and betrayed the boy who was mean to me by dropping him in lava), and being able to have that escape was liberating. But I never even considered doing anything to anyone for real, it didn't even enter my mind.
The more I think of it now, the more I feel relieved I didn't get any revenge. No matter how good it might have felt then I would have to live with it now and know that I stooped to their level, dirtied myself, compromised who I am, and in worst case scenario maybe even gotten a police record. No thanks.

For about 2 decades I felt a lot of rage towards those who bullied me in school and those who subjected me to (not so random) street harassment in my teen and adult age. Due to recent threads I have come to realise that I no longer carry the resentment, what happened happened, and they have no more power of me. Some of the incidents can still make me angry to think of, but I don't feel like I'm about to explode anymore. I haven't forgotten or forgiven (I can't use the term forgiven for someone who's not sorry), but they don't matter anymore. It has been a very liberating discovery for me.

for a living object lesson in how bullies can atone, google danion brinkley and "saved by the light" - he was a grade A bully who got struck by lightning one day and met his maker, who proceeded to show him [in a total immersion 3D experience] what bad things he did to people until then. he said the experience devastated him and then it was impressed upon him that he had to make it better for each and every one he abused up to then, if it took him the rest of his life to do.

bullies are unable to learn the golden rule. it is an exceptional circumstance when a sociopath learns that he or she should not mistreat other people. if you bloody a bully's nose he likely will return with firepower. decades of youth on youth deadly violence is evidence of this. there is something sick at heart of american society for it to be churning out so many sociopathic bullies [filling our prisons and jails] in comparison with other nations. we cannot just be the most evil people on earth.

There is some truth to this but my experience has taught me if you bloody a bully's nose he will find another target because he wants to save face with the group and remain 'untouchable', as insane as that seems to me. Doesn't solve the problem but I had enough attacks to last 10 lifetimes. However times are changing and 2 16 year old kids shot real bullets at each other recently on my parents street in a middle class neighborhood so who knows anymore? I wonder it I'm the only sane person left some days.

Regardless, in my experiences the worst thing you can to is ignore a bully. In my experience they will just ramp up the attacks until they get the reaction they want and believe me, they WILL get it. It's like in baseball: I was run over once as a catcher and I did not react since I didn't want to start a fight or get tossed. It grew until everyone on the other team was running me over even on a routine trot home and the parents were standing back and cheering them on. If I had to grab the first kid who did it and knock him on his butt, none of this wouldn't have happened and they wouldn't have had to implement a new rule outlawing all contact with the catcher. Sadly, my aversion to violence meant I almost had to quit baseball because of these bullying incidents but for once authorities jumped in and stopped it. By the time I realized I NEEDED to use violence and was filled with overwhelming rage, it was too late because it was 15 on 1 just like in school. At that point fighting back is like taking on the entire US Marine Corps: impossible no matter how strong or determined you are.


I read up extensively on Dannion Brinkley's experience and as much as skeptical as I am, I really, really hope that's what happens to bullies. I don't want to see them suffer in an afterlife but I would like them to truly feel deep down what incredible emotional and physical harm they did to me. Unfortunately, at least in this present life they know darn well what they did and enjoyed every second of it. The biggest delusion in my opinion is believing bullies are just unaware of the true consequences of their actions. In my experience, they are VERY aware of what they did, are proud of it and don't feel any shame or remorse whatsoever.

I would be very surprised if anyone had a framed picture of their boss at home and spent quality free time smiling at their piccy.

I don't need to. most of them have died or gone to prison - or at least ended up in dead end jobs because of getting random people they met in a nightclub preggers....

I electrocuted him with a stun tazer I made
and when the 20 Hz at 60000 volts hit him,
he let go of me real quick, pooped his pance
and fell like a tree.

This was a home made device using a little
12 volt gel cell, a 555 timer chip, some power
transistors, and 2 ignition coils from an old
ford some place, and chopped the end of a
cattle probe off.

you're lucky he didn't just come back with a gun. our prisons/death rows are full of bullies all too eager to take things to the ultimate level. life is dirt-cheap for these kinds of folk.

true today. this was back in the 80s.

The best revenge with humans, I've learnt, is to utter in words the truths they've devoted their lives to hide from themselves.

You destroy the bully/harrasser/aggressor forever - and they can't even call you on it or take revenge, because they won't admit to themselves that their lives are such a lie that anyone uttering some truth can destroy them. Their reaction, invariably is, like a vampire that was trying to suck my blood, to flee horrorized from the "light" I've suddenly thrown on them.

I'm feared and respected by those who've seen me do this to others. They know my tongue is like a flashlight, suddenly flooding with light that which by everyone's agreement in society, needs to keep in the dark. The pink elephant, the emperor's nudity.

I developed this weapon after I analyzed society for decades and finally learned a bit of the basic principles on which humans function, mostly "None of the truth and anything but the truth. I swear." I'm very good at it because I leveraged that skill I have because of my NVLD - the above-normal verbal ability.

And it's the way (in addition to reporting to the Police) that I, an ageing, autistic, totally alone in the world, poor, gentle, kind, massively rejected, woman manage to survive. Otherwise I wouldn't last a week in this wolves' den that is society, at least the society I live in.

^^^
i wish MY tongue were like a flashight

^Me too. I have no idea how to get any points across like what you describe, Moondust. I have never been able to 'think on my feet' (or ever come up with a good retort for that matter). When I read accounts where people just throw insults back ad forth, I have no idea how either side is able to.
I can scream and shout obscenities but that's no use at all of course. It just makes me look bad no matter what anyone does.
I envy you your flashlight talent. Can you try to explain to us no-skillers how you do it? What kind of things you say?