Autism, Empathy and Others... really... what"s the deal

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Right...

Another user just told me that Autistics CAN empathise...

As I understood it, The core problem of Autism, is the inability to relate to another person as a special, live living thing, and all the other problems like social issues are secondary and superficial, caused by the core issue.

I thought:

Its not that we dont understand, in the theorectical sense, which I mentioned in another post earlier about creating a complex
" if this then that" model in my head making emulation of someones problems and experience the pain that way.

It's not that we can't see someone suffering.

Autistics feel pain themselves and have strong emotions yes, but have difficulty communicating.

Its just we dont know how to deal with it

Its like most stereotypical males and their partners:
" why you crying over X??" :S
("god women are so emotional")

Not getting/understanding why crying, cause its "*just a duck*with a broken wing"
(ie: When people get upset I struggle to See why someone would get upset) / think its silly/childish
AND

Not knowing/being able to act/react appropriately for several reasons.
(learn to imitate others yes, but still feels fake, uneasy etc)

and autistics like routine etc and knowing what comes next, dont got that with emotions.


theres more but i'm exhausted atm.




Is the above not correct??
And autistics CAN empathise?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Empathy#Em ... ve_empathy

Relevant bit:

i don't often get a proper picture of how other people think, but i home right in on how they feel, in general.

Hmm.



Emotional Empathy: CONNECT
Cognitive Empathy: OBSERVE


So if I feel as if I :
- dont connect
- can interpret how someone is feeling/thinking

I'm characterized in Psychopathy, schizophrenia,
depersonalization and narcissism ? lol!

I WAS joking bout Sociopath you know? xD



(D. Goleman)
Compassionate Empathy/ Empathic concern:
Moved to help.


Ok YuuThere xD
!
How can people see someone suffer, which they know how to help, but DONT because

"can't go offering random advice, it's rude and condescending" (result: "you dont know me!! you dont understand how I feel!! WhoTheF dyou think you are!! Think your somehow better!!"

"I'm not getting any thing from it/being paid"
(pretty much what my Psychistrist said, lol)

etc

How is that not cold, and inhuman and all the other bad stuff? That to me shows more Sociopathic, narcissistic, indifference etc behaviour, and actually as a matter of fact is a contributing factor to why so many people suck!! !

Ahem. 'scuse me.


Back to the Post xD

I will go read depersonalization, and be back.

I would love a response, from any one on the Turning a blind eye on Q, to, please.

Hmm...

ok i've read what can, and yes, things do seem to point at some sort of dissociative disorder of some sort.

I have had early ASD behaviours though,
and I also have studied body language quite intensely previous DX, and I just read disassxxx are hypersensitive to others, so maybe am ASD a detatched one (hope GF dont read that xD)

So thank you YuuGirl for unintentionally bringing this to my focus! (I knew was detatched but not like this!)


Looks like I stand corrected!
Thank you.

s/YuuGirl/Yuugiri

Wikipedia in this case - is complete BS.

Read the highlighted rows below in the diagnistic criterias.

I don't experience empathy like normal people do.

For example when there is a natural disaster with lots of deaths, my mom tells me her friends husband died, I see a car crash on tv etc, all I feel is "Well s**t. It must suck to be them. Oh well."

I don't get upset, sad or angry like most people do. I experience the empathy cognitively but not emotionally.

In my opinion, to have emotional empathy is a weakness.

I think everybody's different, whether they're NT or not. Some NTs experience emotion and cognitive empathy more than others. It can also depend on age, gender and culture too. Not everybody's the same, and being NT doesn't mean you're extremely kind, loving and caring, full of empathy and very understanding of people of all kinds and able to put themselves in the shoes of people by imagining how they must be feeling in their situation. If every NT was like that then why do Aspies and Autistics get so rejected and misunderstood throughout our lives?

I'm confused with empathy. I can feel empathy, depending on the situation.

If somebody announces that somebody they know (but I don't know) has died, I want to cry for them. My eyes fill up with tears, and I usually give them a cuddle. Not all people do this though, some just say ''oh I'm sorry to hear that'' but don't get tears in their eyes, especially a lot of men. They may feel it inside them, I don't know, but I don't see many men expressing empathy. Teenagers are just as bad. I remember when my aunt's best friend died, and my cousin (who was 16 at the time) just sat there texting on her phone, without any emotion at all. I felt sad for my aunt for losing a best friend though.

Also in some situations I can think ''OK, I get annoyed when that happens to me, so I'm not going to let that happen to other people'' type of thing.

When writing a story, I find it extremely hard to make characters (whether they're people or animals) die in the story. I just can't do it.

I don't get upset over strangers' unhappiness. But whenever I see somebody inflicting pain on others, I feel rage. Ex:

People dying because of a plague -> I couldn't care less.

A sadist sonofab**** hitting animals just to please his pathetic ego -> ''Where is my chainsaw, darling?''.

It is about feelings of justice, I suppose.

One week 3 people I knew at work either had deaths or or sudden illness in the fam. I was in my car alone when I got the news of the last one, and I burst into tears. I never spent time with these people outside of work but they were friendly to me and we worked together almost every day. I sent them texts offering condolences, food, etc. but I didn't have an urge to hug them when I saw them and I didn't feel right talking about it until they brought it up. It's like I know what people normally do in these situations, especially growing up in a tight church community, but I don't take it upon myself to act without someone giving me a cue.
Now something like the Sandy Hook tragedy didn't weigh as much on my emotions. I don't have any younger siblings but I am close to my elementary age nieces whom I adore. Maybe if I had watched news footage like on 9/11 it would have been different. When I first heard about the towers falling I knew it was important but I didn't feel much but anxiety until I watched the news that night. I feel like I'm not easily shocked anymore and I'm more anxious to start critically thinking about the causes and solutions to the problem.