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When you finally self-diagnosed yourself, when all made sense and you said to yourself, "now that's settled, I can get on with life and stuff" but you kept researching and reading and hanging out on forums like this, asking questions, all the while feeling the cramping effect of time because you have a story or something you want to work on, or at least go outside in the fresh air, but you keep coming back and signing on to the internet and thinking of yet another Asperger's search?

Also... when I read about the 'motor difficulties' and balance/coordination I did not really latch on to what that meant. But now lately, I catch myself and remember things:
If I make fried eggs for breakfast it is a rare day when I turn both of them over without breaking at least one - they usually end up scrambled.
Similar when making pancakes and turning them over.
I loved throwing frisbees but was not very good at it, nor at catching them (I didn't have many opportunities).
I once tried riding a motorcycle when I was about 14 but I lasted about 20 yards and realized I wasn't going to ride motorcycles when I grew up.
I was late learning to tie my shoes (even now I have a different way of doing it, which more than one person has commented on) and I was late figuring out which was left or right.


What about some of your motor/coordination difficulties?

Last I checked, AS manifests itself more through peculiar social interactions, trouble relating to others, or stereotypical "nerdy" obessions. If there's a correlation between motor problems and AS I'd bet it's a weak one. Motor skill problems you describe aren't particularly unusual.

Beware, self-diagnosing yourself with mental and social impairments is a good way to feel self-loathing, and to imagine yourself as being one special snowflake... a common desire among angsty teenagers. You may want to get professionally diagnosed ...

Aspergers is certainly an interesting topic to study. But as SineWave said professional diagnose is required, hypochondria is very easy in regard to mental disorders.

Your site has a pseudo-intellectual feel to it, try to write something "tangible".

I was diagnosed, so I had no choice but to leave it at that. How could I doubt the doctors? I knew they were right, so I had to stick to what they said. There should not be doubting any time around is what I thought in my head. For the most part, I trust everyone I know. How could I not? My gosh! Am I possibly in my own little world, or what?

Yeah but also many of us never get diagnoised professionally when were younger and whats the point when your older.

Closure?

Dear Members Online Right Now:

I would like to let you all know that my feelings have changed suddenly. I feel a little sad that I have been diagnosed, and I am trying ever so hard to remember the fact that I said having AS was a gift. I do think so, but other things have forced me to think otherwise for some reason.

Possibly, my feelings have changed because of another member who posts on this forum. This person has been feeling quite sad themselves, and they are not even an American.

I do realize, though, that crying and sadness is a universal language, whether you are in America or not. This person is not online right now, but if you search around, you will see that they want somebody to e-mail them. I think I am feeling the same way they are.

People say that what they think, they usually say. Well, not in this case for now. My feelings have changed suddenly, and I think my conscience is telling me to yearn for some consolation.

The first thing that struck me about AS was the problems with social interaction, and I recalled incidents throughout life. There is mention of clumsiness and motor skills in some AS descriptives, which did not alert me to any connections. And I don't really care about a professional diagnosis. Motor skills that I described may not be unusual, true, but when one adds those possibly weak correlations to the rest, things make sense.
I was never concerned with being a 'special snowflake' and I am in my early forties.

There are things a lot more interesting than Asperger's and I don't see why a professional diagnosis is 'required'. But, as I said almost two months ago, for my first post, it was something that caught my attention that I stumbled onto by accident and thus the study began.

Wow, I feel like I stepped into a nest of yellow jackets.
Sorry...
Yeah, the tangibility... needs work, I know. Thanks.

Correction everyone, I'm sorry. A general nurse practitioner diagnosed me with AS. As for what to do with my feelings, I have no clue. Unusual feelings have struck me this time around. All of you must be under the impression that if I have a private issue in regards to someone on this forum, I should send them a PM or an e-mail. In my opinion, reading all of your replies to this thread has shattered the earth.

No, I'm sorry, I was just being rude.

As has been said, 'closure'.
There is no real practical value - that I can see - to being officially diagnosed at this age. As I read I see there is no 'cure' - and I am also aware that many who are or consider themselves Aspies do not want a cure, because they feel it is not any disorder at all needing a 'cure'; they only want to be able to navigate better through life - if I am understanding correctly.
In my case, it's more like looking back on life, reading about Asperger's, reading accounts of others, putting things together, "So that's what it was..." It just all makes sense. All the confusions and complications make sense, the holes in the puzzle are filled when the autistic influence is considered.
Well... now what? Move on with life and enjoy as much as possible - whether one is Aspie or NT or something yet to be discovered.
Think so?

hi tim kimbler!

I, too, am an older aspie who exhibited many of the very same motor skill challenges you speak of, including tie-ing my shoes, etc. I can totally validate what you are saying, especially considering we grew up in an era when AS was not yet labled; professional diagnosis becomes merely a confirmation in short order of what has otherwise taken a lifetime to define through introspection.

On the other hand, it is our right and duty to ourselves to continually question both self-analysis and professional diagnosis in our quest to continue to evolve as individuals with the hope of self-improvement.

Learning that I am Aspergian, has helped in my navigation of this quest and it has explained the very striking characteristics of my childhood behaviour and many traits I retain as an adult.

Good luck to you!

Part of the point here, is that, whether one decides they are verifiable Aspie or at the least bear traits that resemble AS... I'm having a very tough time leaving it alone. I want to get back to my writing, photography, it's beautiful outside now... Want to somehow put this new knowledge out of immediate awareness and get on with life, and worry less about whether or not I comply with the Rules. But I can't yet drop it. Is this common? Is this what they call obsession? Do you just ride it out to completion, until something new captures your attention?

i think it's common, based on my own experience and what I have seen here at WP.

As defined in the Gillberg and Gillberg Criteria for Asperger's Syndrome, motor discoordination is part of Aspergers. However, this is the sixth criterion, and to get a general diagnosis (outside of a psychological research setting) one only needs to fulfill five of the six:

Social impairment (extreme egocentricity)
(at least two of the following):
(a) Inability to interact with peers
(b) Lack of desire to interact with peers
(c) Lack of appreciation of social cues
(d) Socially and emotionally inappropriate behavior

Narrow interest
(at least one of the following):
(a)Exclusiong of other activities
(b) Repetitive adherance
(c) More rote than meaning

Repetitive Routines
(at least one of the following):
(a) On self, in aspects of life
(b) On others

Speech and language peculiarities
(at least three of the following):
(a) Delayed development (criterion not in US)
(b) Superficially perfect expressive language
(c) Formal pedantic language
(d) Odd prosody, peculair voice characteristics
(e) Impairment of comprehension including misinterpretation of literal/implied meanings

Non-verbal communication problems
(at least one of the following):
(a) Limited use of gestures
(b) Clumsy/gauche body language
(c) Limited facial expression
(d) Inappropriate expression
(e) Peculiar stiff gaze

Motor Clumsiness
Poor performances on neuro-developmental examination

As I understand it, Motor Discoordination is related to the sensory dysfunction in Aspergers and other neurological disorders. So the stimming, the sensory sensitivities, balance problems, and motor discoordination are all related to a single dysfunction.

Last edited by Sophist on 04 Jul 2005, 11:54 pm, edited 1 time in total.