This sign should not be posted at the edge of the street.

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Are you two seriously saying autistic children should never be allowed to play outside on their own??! Surely the function level of the child must count!
I was allowed outside on my own from age 2 (although my parents kept an eye on me from the veranda, which I wasn’t aware of). From age 6 I was allowed to go to my grandparents on my own, as long as I told my parents first. They lived maybe 4-5 minutes’ walk from us and I had to cross a road, but because I was a responsible child in that regard I was allowed it. I’d also play in the area, which meant not always where I could be seen by them. I don’t see how anyone can think I shouldn’t have been allowed that freedom, same as my peers?!
The only bad experience I ever had regarding other children when out on my own like that, took place when I was 9. Two boys from my parallel class threatened me with a knife. That didn't happen because I was Aspie, it happened because they weren't quite right. They were always trouble. Once one of them threatened a neighbor with an ax.
To say that ASD children aren't/shouldn't be out without parents/aide etc is madness! We aren't all LFA

No, they shouldn't play on their own.

Amplify the lack of common sense of a normal child by a zillion, and there you go ("a remarkable lack of common sense" is there in the Asperger's paper). That's AS too, not HFA/LFA.

Complete and utter nonsense. It depends entirely on the child. If attitudes like that are common, I can only thank the magical beings I don't believe in that I wasn't dx'ed until my 30's! I don't care how this sounds, it's true: I was far more sensible than a "normal" child, I never played in the street, I always minded traffic, I never talked to strangers, I was never a risk taker. I was always amazed at the stupidity and lack of awareness some children showed. It might be a gender thing. Girls are usually smarter (or more mature) in that area, that's why boys are more accident prone.

Last edited by Skilpadde on 25 May 2013, 9:17 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I played outside by myself when I was little too. Never as a small child. I remember being outside young as five by myself without a grown up. I was watched from the window. I still got out of the house when I was three and would wander across the street to play with this girl's roller skates or to watch her brother get on and off the special ed bus because I was fascinated by the ramp. But my mom would always come out too.

Just pay attention and follow the laws while driving like your suppost too and you won't hit anything or anyone so on that basis theres no need for a sign. The eople who tend to hit these kids won't notice or read the signs anyway. Why not just stick to the time tested and true children at play sign, the details are not needed. Around here they will put the disabillity (deaf, blind etc.) sign right outside your home.

Your response illustrates why this whole labeling thing is crap. I'm a self diagnosed AS but I was catching a bus on my own (quite independently) when I was five years old. On the other hand there are plenty of kids diagnosed with AS (like one who goes to my daughter's swimming pool) who always have their parents with them because they lack judgement or common sense (despite being able to talk) to cross the road or swim in a pool on their own.

I used the term "autistic child" to refer to a child diagnosed with autism,I wasn't actually referring to Aspies. In addition the manufacturer of the sign (assuming its legit) was probably aiming the warning to look out for autistic kids who are considered to be a "higher risk" of being blind to dangers of vehicles etc. You may be insulted by the sign but it's intention might be to save lives.

Last edited by cyberdad on 26 May 2013, 6:02 am, edited 1 time in total.

I never was diagnosed with anything and I don't remember my mother letting me play outside by myself or even leave the house by myself until I was at least 10-12. Even then I don't remember doing much unsupervised until I was 14. I guess my mother was overprotective but I'm amazed at how young some kids seem that are out on the street on their own without adult supervision.

That little girl that wandered off and drowned recently was playing in the yard with another child and no adult supervision. Had an adult been supervising that never would have happened. If a child was the physical age her mental age was they never would have been left alone outside.

As a child of at least 10 I was followed by a couple in a van. They could have snatched me. There have been plenty of cases in the news of neurotypical children getting abducted as I'm sure you know. My sister (NT) was gullible enough to get in a stranger's car that asked directions and he exposed himself to her and masturbated in front of her. My friend (NT) and I were walking home from school together at age 12 or 13 and a boy from the school exposed himself to us and masturbated in some trees alongside the pavement. There are other incidents I could quote. We had parents who thought it was a "normal" level of being out unsupervised.

AS means usually low awareness of danger. My children are both highly intelligent, possibly gifted, but they both think they could fight off an abductor and that they are invincible (also both think I should let them go and stay in a hotel alone, go to malls alone - they are 8 and 11). This is despite me telling them there are bad people out there and that people get kidnapped. I cannot believe the freedom you had at such a young age, luckily you are here to tell the tale but as you suffered one knife threat you may not have been. What if those boys had stabbed you? Yes it may have been that they "weren't right" - but that's the point! These types exist out there and the very fact this happened to you illustrates my point.

Then there is the running off thing which both of mine have a history of and which my youngest is still doing aged 8 - and that's when she's with me. Then there are the meltdowns causing loss of awareness and any shred of common sense there was.

An AS child could be thrown a ball and feel such anxiety at being "supposed to" catch it because of being rule-bound and not wishing to be jeered at for missing, that they could run into the road to catch it. Then there is the issue of NT peers abusing an AS child's gullibility and making them do things to be laughed at which could be dangerous. (What about the teenage Aspie given a bomb by his supposed friends and losing his hands recently?)

My children are AS and HFA - not LFA. My eldest is asking me when I will let her go places alone, but because of the things she says (she lives in a fantasy world where she thinks she's a character from Alvin & The Chipmunks) and thinks she's invincible, doesn't understand dangers, is very gullible and easily-led, I would not dream of letting her go places alone (I wouldn't let an NT child go alone anyway).

I could go on and on. An AS/autie child should never play unsupervised or in a situation where they could make a split second decision that could kill them (such as right alongside a road).

(edited for typos and additions)

Last edited by whirlingmind on 26 May 2013, 5:04 am, edited 5 times in total.

http://www.pressdemocrat.com/article/20130513/ARTICLES/130519855/1350?Title=Search-expands-for-missing-Clearlake-girl

http://www.sfgate.com/news/article/Missing-S-F-autistic-girl-found-dead-4519317.php

She was 9 but her mental age was 1.

Oh, I thought the joke was about exploiting autistics’ tendency to follow rules blindly, so they play right there and get run down.

It reminds me of this.

http://dsjvpv76ko1eo.cloudfront.net/uim ... 7f615.600x

I must admit, I have never seen children over the age of 5 randomly run out on to the road.

But when I was a child, I was quite cautious, and I didn't have fussy, overprotective parents either. I remember once when I was about 7 or 8, I was playing on my bike in my street on my own, and a man came by and something about him frightened me, the way he was looking and walking. He seemed intimidating, and I grabbed my bike and ran to my house, pulling the bike along. I told my mum and she was pleased I knew better to come home if I see anyone looking a bit dodgy.

It happened again another time, when I was about 9. I was playing under a tree on my own, and a car drew up with two young men inside. One of them leered at me and said, ''would you do it with me?'' I didn't speak to them nor go near the car. I just turned and ran home as fast as I could.

But I remember I knew a kid of my age with learning difficulties. He went to mainstream school but required extra help, and his mum wouldn't let him go out to play alone even at 10 because he still used to run out in the road, and he even took offered sweets from older men who he didn't know. Luckily they weren't drugs or contaminated.

That was how I interpreted it.

My son gets lost in his thoughts and will walk into the road without looking - He is high functioning but I never let him go in or out of the school gates alone for this reason - the problem is that I have a two year old who sometimes wonders off on her own, and newsflash, I have one set of eyes, hands and legs. This isn't bad parenting, this is 'real life'! I can only imagine the stress on parents who have children who are low/moderately functioning knowing there is a chance that they will run into the street with little warning - unfortunately, as politically incorrect as it may be, sign posting to warn drivers and people around, is just common f'king sense.

You can see a clear rectangular outline on the word "Autistic". This is not a real sign, but now exists in your collective minds.

Also, Photoshop users will notice some botched cloning right away.

@ cyberdad Exactly! It’s all about the child’s function level/understanding of its surroundings.
I’m sure there are children who shouldn’t be out by themselves but it’s way more than neurology to it. I remember someone on here (don’t recall who) talking about how he was traffic safe at young age while his NT sister wasn’t.

Yeah and if someone had showed up on your school with a gun, they could have shot you. There have been quite a few incidents in China and Japan where men have run into school yards and stabbed children, and there was a case in France where Jewish children were targeted. Maybe all children should be home-schooled just in case? Or is it just the autistic children along with Japanse, Chinese and Jewish children who need it? You can’t ever make anything 100% safe, and being hysterical is no solution.


Yes, there have been several cases, that’s true. You know what more? In the majority of cases of child abuse, the perpetrators are someone the child knows. So maybe children should grow up in institutions only surrounded by robots to tend to their needs, not too unlike the episode of South Park where all the adults go crazy thinking someone will take their children, then realize that the majority of cases were by family they are the biggest threat and send their children out to fend for themselves in the wild.

Yes, there is some sarcasm in my reply so far, because I find this disturbing. I expect this kind of nonsense from NTs but not from my fellow spectrumites, who among all people should be the first to know how diverse the autism spectrum is, even within one particular part of it, like AS. I wasn’t anything like what you describe so no, I should not have had my freedom reduced just because some spectrum children need more looking after than their peers. Just like there will be NT children who will need more looking after than others, there are definitely AS children who needs no more babying in matters of safety than their NT peers, and there are some of us who were beyond them in such matters. So saying that AS children need to be looked after period is as wrong as those saying we’re a danger because one aspie shot 20 children in a school.
The individual has to be taken into account, and you must also remember that the autistic spectrum is one of extremes so while some aspie children can be hopeless with safety, others will be equally advanced in their understanding.



To me it sounds incredible that your sister was gullible enough to enter someone’s car willingly. That’s something I’d never do! I was so skeptical to strangers I felt bad when a photographer came to take pictures of us in daycare. We were supposed to be called up one by one but I refused to go because it felt wrong to me. I was used to my parents taking pictures of me, that was normal, but not okay for a stranger. So I sat tight at the sandbox, and they took the pic there. I refused to look up at all. Because it felt wrong.

When I was somewhere between 10 and 12, I was on my way to my grandparents. I had just gotten to the sideroad leading to their block, so I was a few meters from their door when a guy in a car said “Hey!”. I turned, and waited, skeptical and ready to run if needed, but willing to try to explain the way if that was what he needed. I’m naturally skeptical and his attention set off my danger alarm. “Do you wanna help me sell flowers?” he asked with a smile. He had some trailer thing attached to his car. (this type: http://www.tilhenger.com/TIKITILHENGER%20B250.jpg )It was open but I didn’t look to see if there was anything in it. I just ran as fast as I could to my grandparents’ stairwell.


That’s certainly not so in my case. If I had been more skeptical to strangers than I am, I would have been paranoid. When my parents explained that there were bad people out there that could do me harm, I had no problems getting it at all. If anything it made sense to me that strangers equaled bad.
In the same way I understood looking out for cars and traffic. When I was 6 we moved to a place where the street was closer to our home and so they drilled me in it and I got it right away. I remember my parents playing the part of cars in the living room while they taught me, and boy, I found it so embarrassing, lol! The message got through though.
Even in daycare I had no problems understanding that medicine wasn’t candy and that eating it when you weren’t sick was a bad idea, so I never tried to eat.
I had great respect for fire so it was unthinkable for me to play with matches or lighters. As opposed to some of my NT classmates who in 5th or 6th grade took some interest in playing with matches and would set them off by striking each other’s (and their own) jeans. I just looked and never participated (and no, they never tried to set anyone on fire). And before you talk about children and freedom, this happened during recess.
When I was 11 I was walking along a small road inside a residential area along with an NT classmate. A car came up behind us, driving slowly of course, according to the speed limit in residential areas. I immediately stepped to the side to let it pass. The other girl turned around, waved at them and walked on lazily for a bit before she let it pass. That’s something I have never done. I would never trust that the person behind the wheel was normal and not someone who’d do me harm if I didn’t get out of the way. I knew it wasn’t likely but I also knew the consequences would be bad for me if it did happen, so car equals get out of the way.


I can see why your children can’t enjoy the same freedom I did. I cannot even begin to understand where your children are coming from. They must be very different from the child I was.
I never fought I could fight off an adult (or even someone older than me). That was why I was wary of older boys. Often I didn’t want to go to bed, and especially when I was 8 I did what I could to postpone it, including hiding behind a commode. My father would then pull me out from behind it and drag me to bed, while I tried to hold on to everything on the way there. I knew painfully well that I was no match for an adult.
I never thought I was invincible (hence my fear of things I saw as dangerous, like fire and strangers). I couldn’t quite comprehend death, but I feared injuries.
I don’t know how far your malls are from your home, but I started going downtown on my own when I was 13. Always in daytime. At first it was to go to services (something I took an interest in at the time), and a year or two later it was also to go one particular book store and also to look at video games. This was the same age as my peers started going downtown alone while some still weren’t allowed.
When I was 10 my parents and I visited my grandmother up north. It was the first time I was there. I live in the south eastern part of the country, as do one of my cousins who is six years older than me. While I was there I learnt that this cousin went there every summer on her own and had done so since she was fairly little. I was very glad I didn’t. Flying in the safe company of my parents was fun. The plane ride she had on her own sounded scary to me. I can’t even grasp how a child would think it could be cool or okay or whatever it is they think, to stay in a hotel alone. Heck, I was nervous enough when I did that for the first (and so far only) time at the age of 26! I always reacted when I read books where children did unbelievable things like that; starting a business, thinking they could catch real criminals or run away from home to be a star or join the circus etc. Some of the ideas presented in some children’s books were just so much too much for me. I knew it was just fiction but sent in an otherwise realistic world, it was too much of a stretch.
As for running off, I have never had a history of that. I hear sometimes about autistic children who will run from their daycare, and I’m equally amazed every time. I never went off on my own. I was afraid to get lost. When I was anywhere with my daycare, class or family, I made very sure that I stay with the group. I was terrified of getting lost. On a similar note, I can’t understand how children can go off the train on unknown stations when they know their families are on the train. Before we moved, probably from about the age 3-5, I would play on the train when my mother and I went to the downtown area. There was a pole (for passengers to hold on to) located near each door. I would grab it and run in circles around it until we neared a station and people came to the doors on the opposite side to go off the train. I stopped my game then and waited for them to leave before I went back to the running around the pole game. My mother sat nearby and kept an eye on me but never needed to stay by my side or be hysterical in fear of me doing anything stupid like going off at the wrong station.
As for meltdowns, I can only remember one where I really lost it, and that was at home. I was 6. I’m far more prone to shutdowns.


I am sure there are AS children who could be like that, just like there are NT children who can be so into a ball game that they’d run into the street to get the ball without realizing what they’re doing. I never did either and wouldn’t have. Ball games were played away from traffic. In fact to play ball near traffic I’d have to go seek it out.


We didn’t have ball bombs, and no one could ever have persuaded me into doing anything I thought could be too dangerous for me. I keep hearing about how gullible we’re supposed to be, but I seem to be close to the other extreme. I take most everything with a grain of salt.
As I mentioned there was that one episode with those two boys, other than that other children gave me no grief when I was out on my own. Other than the bullying in 4th grade, I had it easy. Nothing very extreme ever happened. I know lots of people here have been through a lot but I had it fairly easy really.

As for Michael Boggan… He is 15 and of normal intelligence. You can't babysit a boy like that.
I noticed there was some debate about the perpetrator and whether or not he knew what the ball contained. I’m assuming here that he did know. If the 17 year old really was set to harm Michael, he’d find a way. Leave the ball on his property (if they have a garden). Leave it in a box outside his door and write Michael’s name on it. Throw it at him when he’s in school or walking with his babysitter. Throw it at him into his window if they live on a reasonably low floor. If he want to harm him, he’d find a way no matter what precautions taken.


An 11 year old who thinks she’s a cartoon character? Really? Why I never! It that’s true, it sounds like she needs counseling. I have played being someone else but I have never believed I was. Sorry, but that’s not normal.
If your assessment of your daughter is correct, then it does indeed sound like she shouldn’t go on her own. But when you say you wouldn’t let any 11 year old be on their own at all, then that’s just way too extreme. I don’t know where you live, but at some point children need to become their own individuals.
I’m very glad I grew up with freedom and not extreme limits.


The freedom I had was just the same freedom the other children around me had. It was normal. The girl next door (from I was 2-5) was a couple of months younger than me and she and I played out by ourselves.
The freedom I had was just the same as same aged children in the neighborhood had, and later as my classmates had. Once again I thank my lucky stars for being born into the family I did.


I appreciate the sentiment but I was never in any real danger for crying out loud.


First of all, if they had stabbed me, the knife was a small pocket knife, not much more than a letter opener, so hopefully I would have made it. More importantly, they didn’t stab me. They didn’t even try to. I said they probably weren’t quite right, but I don’t know if they ‘had’ anything. They could have just been silly boys mouthing off, trying to look tough. They never bothered me before that, and they never did after the incident.

OMG this is almost funny! To you that incident proves your point, to me it proves mine. The worst thing that happened to me was a verbal threat by two boys who had a knife but didn’t do anything to me. That’s the worst thing another child ever did to me. For the most part my childhood was good and easy.



Yeah, I could go on and on too, but after this I’m dropping this thread. There isn't more to say and this thread is bad for my blood pressure I think.

Hell I am 27 and I will still wander out on the road when I am crossing if I get too lost in my thoughts.